Perfect
by probablyprocrastinating
Summary: Merder au 3/3
1. Chapter 1

_Hi guys! Here is Perfect, I thought I'd put the first chapter up for you guys. I should have some more time next week when my college assignments are done for a couple of weeks, to write the next part. Please let me know what you guys think/what kind of things you'd like to see. I have the whole thing pretty much mapped out already but if there's anything you guys want to see I will try my best to incorporate it in if I can! Even if it's just a scene or something you guys would like to read of them_

 _Thank you to those of you who have stuck with me throughout this trilogy and I'm hoping this one will be the best one yet. It's going to be a long one and there's going to be drama, but I love these two as much as you and so there's also going to be a lot of cuteness and fun_ _._

 _I also know a lot of you guys have been asking me about Stone Cold and I know it's hard to but believe me when I say I WILL finish it. It might not be for a while but one day it will be done._

 _For those of you who haven't read the first two stories I would go back and start with Help me lose my mind so you can get up to date with this MerDer universe._

 _Thank you and I hope you like it!_

 _PP X_

 _I found a love for me_  
 _Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead_  
 _Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet_  
 _Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me_

 _'Cause we were just kids when we fell in love_  
 _Not knowing what it was_  
 _I will not give you up this time_  
 _But darling, just kiss me slow_  
 _Your heart is all I own_  
 _And in your eyes you're holding mine_

 _Baby, I'm dancing in the dark_  
 _With you between my arms_  
 _Barefoot on the grass_  
 _Listening to our favourite song_  
 _When you said you looked a mess_  
 _I whispered underneath my breath_  
 _But you heard it,_  
 _Darling, you look perfect tonight_

 _Well, I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know_  
 _She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I'll share her home_  
 _I found a love to carry more than just my secrets_  
 _To carry love, to carry children of our own_

 _We are still kids but we're so in love_  
 _Fighting against all odds_  
 _I know we'll be alright this time_  
 _Darling, just hold my hand_  
 _Be my girl, I'll be your man_  
 _I see my future in your eyes_

 _Baby, I'm dancing in the dark_  
 _With you between my arms_  
 _Barefoot on the grass_  
 _Listening to our favourite song_  
 _When I saw you in that dress_  
 _Looking so beautiful_  
 _I don't deserve this_  
 _Darling, you look perfect tonight_

 _Baby, I'm dancing in the dark_  
 _With you between my arms_  
 _Barefoot on the grass_  
 _Listening to our favourite song_  
 _I have faith in what I see_  
 _Now I know I have met an angel in person_  
 _And she looks perfect_  
 _I don't deserve this_  
 _You look perfect tonight_

'Still nervous?' Asked Derek, squeezing her hand as they made their way across the parking lot.

'Very.' Meredith nodded. 'I wish there was a mixer so we could have met people before today.'

'I know.' Derek murmured. 'But Lara and Joe will be there.'

'I still find that weird.' Meredith scrunched her nose.

'At least we wont be running into them all the time unless we're on peds.'

'True.' She sighed. 'Do they do a lot on the surgical floor.'

'I don't think so.' Derek shook his head. 'Only every now and again.'

'And Mark.' Meredith giggled.

'Oh don't remind me,' Derek rolled his eyes. 'Having Mark as my boss is one hundred percent my worst nightmare.'

'He might not be your resident.'

'No but he's still a resident. And we're interns.'

'At least knowing him we have our insider knowledge.' She giggled, turning to glance up at Derek who was smiling softly at her.

'Very true,' he laughed. 'At least this way mom knew to give us enough food for forty eight hours.'

'Probably the only thing going to get us through.' Meredith grinned, moving her hand from his to wrap around his waist, leaning into him as they neared the hospital.

'Yeah.' He sighed as they stopped in front of it, and he squeezed Meredith close.

'We're here.' She grinned.

'We're here.' He nodded. 'Fourth best surgical residency program in the country.'

'Yeah.' She whispered.

'You ready?'

'Yeah.' She nodded, before pulling on his hand as he started to walk toward the door. 'Wait… Der…'

'Yeah?' he turned around.

'I… love you.' She murmured, moving closer to him and wrapping her arms around his neck.

'I love you.' He whispered, kissing her gently. 'And we can do this.'

'Yeah.' She nodded, nuzzling his neck as her arms remained tightly around him.

'Love you.' He repeated, pressing a kiss to her hair.

'Hmmmmm.' She smiled, pulling back from him to give him another quick kiss.

'And we are going to kick ass today.' He ginned, hugging her. 'Dr. Shepherds.'

'Dr. Shepherds.' She giggled.

'I'll leave the snacks in your locker,' he murmured. 'But make sure you save me some.'

'Always.' She breathed, resting her head on his shoulder as he held her close.

'And page me at lunch.'

'Of course.'

'Love you.' He said again.

'Love you.' She echoed, kissing his cheek.

'You ready now?' he breathed.

'Yeah.' She nodded. 'Just wanted an us moment.'

'Hmmmmm.' He smiled, pressing his lips to hers. 'Let's go.'

'Kay.' She smiled, grasping his hand tightly as they headed into the was the first day of hers and Derek's internship at Mount Sinai. They'd moved to New York after graduating med school in June and got an apartment together in-between the hospital and his mother's house.

They'd had three weeks after graduating where they moved home and then took a ten day vacation to Hawaii to have some time together before their lives completely turned around. They'd heard from Mark just how many hours Sinai put them under, and decided it was important to have quality time before they became owned by the hospital.

They'd been married for three years now, and together for eight. Which was the weirdest thing ever. She was twenty seven years old, and Derek was thirty. And they had been together eight years. There was a time when being together six months seemed long, but this was crazy. And although it sounded like such a long time, it had flown.

Her life with Derek was too good to be true, it seemed like yesterday they were in Europe together. But here they were, top and second in their class about to start at Mount Sinai. She leant up and kissed Derek's cheek as they walked down the reception desk to collect their scrubs.

'Hi, we're here to start our internship.' Smiled Derek at the short blonde woman behind the desk.

'Name?' she replied bluntly.

'Derek Shepherd and Meredith Shepherd.'

'Okay,' she noded, reaching for two packs of scrubs and handing them over the desk. 'The locker room is on the second floor the east wing, you'll find it easily.'

'Thanks.' Derek smiled, handing the scrubs to Meredith.

'You're welcome.' The woman nodded.

'East wing,' Derek murmured as they stepped inside the elevator.

'Hmmmm.' Meredith nodded, leaning into him as it made its way up to the second floor.

'Let's go.' He breathed, kissing the top of her head as the doors opened.

'Yeah.' She echoed, following him.

It was pretty obvious when they reached the interns locker room, it was full of loud chatter as people everywhere were changing into scrubs and stuffing stuff in their lockers. Meredith's and Derek's were next to each other's with them having the same last name and he handed her the bag of snacks Allison had given them to put in her locker.

'Thanks.' She whispered, pulling her scrub pants on before taking the bag off him.

'It's okay.' He nodded, putting his coat inside and putting his top on over his shirt.

'Listen up,' came a voice all too familiar as Mark entered the room along side another resident, a clipboard in his hand. 'Carr, Handler, McConnel, Grey and Sims, you're with me.'

'Me?' laughed Meredith.

'Yep you Grey.' Mark winked. 'Come on.'

'Coming.' She nodded, shoving her stuff in her locker and moving to follow Mark and the rest of his interns.

'Now, I'm Doctor Sloan and I am your resident, you will do what I say when I say. Got it?'

'Yeah.' The five of them nodded in unison.

'When I page you, you better be there immediately. And if I hear any crap about you from any of the attendings then you will be on scut until I say otherwise. I assign you to your attending and you do as they say, this first shift is forty eight hours so buckle up.'

'Handler and Sims, you're with , Carr you're with me, Grey and McConnel you're with Dr. Reed. Go.'

'G-go…' Meredith breathed as Mark took off in the opposite direction. 'Where… how do we know where to go?' she turned to a ginger girl next to her.

'You're Grey, right?' she replied.

'Right.' She nodded. 'Well not technically…. But yeah. I'm Grey. Meredith.'

'Georgia.' The girl nodded.

'Are you on Dr. Reed's service too?'

'Nope,' she sighed.

'Oh.' Meredith breathed, turning around to where the other interns had been to see no-one was there. 'Crap where did they go?'

'I have no idea.'

'Damn it. How are we supposed to find the attendings? Mark didn't even take us around the hospital.'

'Mark?' Georgia raised her eyebrows.

'Oh… Dr. Sloan.' Meredith corrected herself.

'Since when did you know Dr. Sloan?'

'He's my brother in law.' Meredith explained, wincing. 'Crap… let's go this way.'

'Okay.' Nodded Georgia, following Meredith as they searched the floor for their attendings. Meredith didn't even know what this Dr. Reed looked like, she was totally screwed.

'Lara!' she shouted as she saw her sister in law getting in an elevator.

'Mer!' Lara grinned, stepping back out to hug her. 'You okay?'

'Yeah,' she nodded. 'No. No I cant find my attending and I have no idea how to.'

'Who is it?' Lara frowned.

'Dr. Reed. And Georgia's looking for Dr. Hond.'

'Reed?' Lara winced. 'Ouch, rather you than me.'

'You know him?'

'Yeah, he should be on the cardio ward. I'll come with you and point him out.'

'Thanks.' She sighed in relief. 'Do you know where Hond is for Georgia?'

'I've just seen her actually she's a peds surgeon, she's on her way to get a CT scan so head there. Down the hall to the right. She's got dark hair, very bubbly.'

'Thanks.' Georgia nodded. 'Bye Meredith.'

'Bye.' Meredith smiled before walking with Lara. 'So what's Dr. Reed like?'

'A jerk,' Lara rolled her eyes. 'I don't know him personally but I've heard a lot.'

'Great.' Meredith sighed.

'So who's your resident?' Lara asked as they turned a corner.

'Guess.' Meredith laughed.

'Who?'

'Mark.' She rolled her eyes.

'Mark is your resident?' Lara laughed. 'That's classic.'

'I know.'

'At least he's not Derek's, he'd die.'

'I know.' Meredith giggled.

'Who's his resident?'

'I don't know,' she shook her head. 'I left before he got assigned.'

'I see.' Lara nodded, stopping walking and pointing across the corridor to a tall man with dark hair. 'Reed.'

'Thanks.' Meredith breathed in relief. 'You're the best.'

'I know.' Lara laughed.

'I owe you.'

'Don't be stupid,' Lara shook her head.

'Thanks.' Meredith breathed before running over. 'Dr. Reed?' she said to the man staring at the OR board.

'Yes?' he turned around.

'I'm Dr. Shepherd, your intern.' Meredith nodded.

'Oh. You're late.'

'Oh… I… I'm sorry sir I wasn't told where to find you.'

'McConnel found me just fine.' He said shortly. ''Here. I need you to do rounds on my patients. Catch up with McConnel.'

'Right.' Meredith nodded, taking the clipboard from him.

'Go.'

'Okay… going…' Meredith nodded, looking at the room numbers on the list and looking through every window she passed until she saw an intern she recognised, assuming it was McConnel and opening the door. 'Dr. McConnel?'

'Yeah?' the guy turned around.

'I'm doing rounds with you.'

'Okay.' He nodded, continuing to write on his clipboard.

'Do you… need me to do anything?'

'Nope.' He shook his head. 'I'm just finishing this and then we're moving on.'

'O-kay….' Meredith breathed, wondering why this guy was acting like her boss. She didn't like this guy already, she had no idea what she was doing and neither did he, they were supposed to be working together and instead she felt like she was useless already.

'Dr. Shepherd, Dr. McConnel,' Dr. Reed came into the room. 'I've just received some blood work back for Mr. Helton and need you both to take him up for an ECG,'

'Okay.' They both nodded.

'Mr, Helton, there is no need to worry,' Dr. Reed turned to the man in the bed who's wife was sat next to him. 'Once we have the ECG results I can give you a better idea of what I think the complication is. But you're in good hands, our new surgical interns will take you up now.'

'Thanks, Dr. Reed.'

'No worries.' He smiled.

'You two, go.'

'Yes sir.' Meredith nodded quickly, putting the chart down and moving to help Dr. McConnel with the bed.

'Do you want to get the door?'

'Are you… okay with the bed?'

'Yeah, you get the door.' He nodded.

'Okay.'She nodded, reaching to open it. Dr. McConnel pushed the bed out of the door before Meredith moved to grab the other side of it and help move it down the corridor.

'Grey, McConnel,' she heard Mark's voice. 'We're going to get an ECG I believe.'

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded.

'Don't get used to my superior presence, I'm only coming with you to show you how it's done.'

'Thank you, Dr. Sloan.' Nodded Dr. McConnel.

'And how are you Mr. Helton?' Mark grinned. 'Haven't seen you in a while.'

'Good.' The middle aged man laughed. 'Just hoping I come out clear and can go home.'

'Hopefully.' Laughed Mark. 'This way.' He nodded to Meredith as they turned a corner. 'And how you doing Grey?'

'Fine.' She smiled.

'And you?' he turned to her fellow intern.

'Yes thank you Dr. Sloan.' He nodded.

'Dr. Reed told me you were late.' He said quietly to Meredith.

'What?' she breathed.

'You were late.'

'Oh.. yeah… only a few minutes… I didn't know where he was or how to find him.'

'Just giving you a heads up,' He murmured. 'McConnel wasn't late, and Reed can be tough.'

'Okay,' she nodded. 'Thanks.'

'But I've got your back, Grey.' Mark smirked.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

Meredith sighed as she slumped against the restroom door. She was having a crap day. The crappiest day she'd had in a long time. Dr. Reed had her and McConnel with him all day, but didn't even acknowledge her. It was like she wasn't in the room. Unless it was to do scut. She had to run and pick up a lab while McConnel got to help Mark prep a guy for surgery, and then she'd been sent to get his coffee. She knew internship was supposed to be hard and she wasn't exactly expecting to cut into anyone, but holding doors open and getting coffee just didn't seem to be benefiting her medical education in any way.

She knew she'd been late that morning but only by a few minutes and it wasn't a conscious thing, she had no idea where she was going. She was lucky she'd bumped into Lara otherwise she could have been wandering around for ages.

She flushed the toilet before heading out to wash her hands in the sink where she bumped into Georgia.

'Hey,' the ginger intern smiled at her.

'Oh, hey.'

'You okay?' she grinned.

'I'm good, thank you.' Nodded Meredith. 'You?'

'Great.' She grinned. 'How's cardio? That's Reed, right?'

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded. 'It's…. how's peds?'

'Good.' Georgia grinned. 'Dr. Hond is great.'

'Lara said she was nice.' Meredith nodded.

'Dr. White?'

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded. 'She's my husbands sister.'

'Oh.' Breathed Georgia. 'She was on my case this morning but she's gone now.'

'She's great.' Smiled Meredith.

'Yeah.' Gerogia nodded. 'So what have you been up to? I got to watch Dr. Hand do a liver transplant on an eight year old, it was amazing.'

'Oh… wow.' Meredith breathed. 'That's great.'

'So what's your case? Any bypasses or anything?'

'Oh… no.' Meredith shook her head. 'We had a patient this morning but it turned out just to be a scare and he's fine.'

'Oh.' Georgia breathed. 'Anything more fun this afternoon?'

'I'm not sure. I'm just going to get Dr. Reed's coffee and then he's going to assign me something else.'

'Coffee?'

'Yeah.' Meredith sighed.

'That… does not sound fun.'

'Not fun at all.' Meredith shook her head.

'Hey have you heard anything about the scrub in?'

'Scrub in?' Meredith frowned.

'Yeah, the intern who gets to scrub in at the end of the first shift.'

'Oh… no.' Meredith shook her head. 'I didn't even know about that.'

'I'll let you know if I hear anymore about it.' Georgia nodded.

'Thanks.' Meredith whispered.

'Anyway, I better be getting back. Dr. Hond's getting a neuro consult for a little girl. I'll see you later.'

'Bye.' Meredith smiled as Georgia left. Scrub in. Someone got to scrub in and she was about a hundred percent sure it wasn't going to be her. Reed seemed to hate her. Georgia had seen a liver transplant and all she had done was run around after an arrogant ass of a doctor.

She sighed as she left the rest room and went to the coffee cart to get another coffee for Dr. Reed. She wondered if Derek was having a better day than she was. Surely he must be. It wasn't hard.

'Dr. Reed,' she smiled, knocking on his open office door, where Dr. McConnel was sat next to him, assessing a scan on the computer screen.

'Ah, my coffee.' He nodded. 'Thanks.'

'No problem.' Meredith breathed. 'I… what would you like me to do now, sir?'

'I've been told they need an intern in the ER, there's a load of backed up rectal exams they need doing.'

'Oh.' She breathed. 'Okay.'

'Bye.' He said, turning his head to drink his coffee.

Rectal exams. Rectal exams. She was being sent to do rectal exams. While Dr. McConnel was sat doing some real work. Some interesting work. Looking at a scan. And working with an attending surgeon. While she was getting coffee and being sent to do rectal exams. At least it was almost eleven, which meant there was only two hours until she saw Derek.

She had a feeling as soon as she saw him she would fall into his arms and start crying. Her attending seemed to hate her and she was doing absolutely nothing. It wouldn't bother her, if everyone's first day was like this; but it wasn't. Georgia had watched a transplant and McConnel was working at the right hand of the head of cardio. While she was running around getting coffee and being treated as if she didn't exist.

She needed Derek. She needed a Derek cuddle and a Derek kiss and Derek telling her everything was going to be alright. As much as she loved him she kind of hoped he was having a crappy day too, that would make her feel better.

She opened the door of the ER and saw an attending.

'Hi I'm Dr. Shepherd, I've been sent down as the intern to help with the… rectal exams?'

'Rectal exams?' the woman laughed. 'What did you do to piss off Reed?'

'What?' Meredith breathed.

'He always palms his worst interns off, the rectal exam is his favourite excuse. He's used it the last four years now.'

'Worst interns?' Meredith breathed, not wanting her voice to waver. 'I… it's only been five hours.'

'Yeah.' The woman laughed. 'and you're already down here.'

'Oh.'

'Here, this way,' the woman nodded. 'I'll take you to your first patient.'

'Okay.' Meredith nodded. 'Thanks.'

She straightened her back as she walked, not wanting to look hurt by what she'd just been told. Worst interns. She was second in her class at Dartmouth, only second to Derek. She hadn't even had a chance to prove herself yet and she was already being branded as one of the worst interns. She wanted to cry. She wanted to cry and she wanted her husband. But she couldn't cry. She couldn't cry because she had to stick her hand up some stinky guy's ass.

She took a deep breath as the woman pulled back the curtain on her first patient. Only two more hours until she could see Derek.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

Meredith sighed as she placed her tray on the table and sat down with the rest of Mark's interns, taking the seat next to Georgia.

'Hey,' she breathed.

'Hey,' grinned Georgia, taking a drink from her water.

'Hey,' smiled another girl.

'Hi,' Smiled Meredith. 'I'm Meredith.'

'Grace Carr.' The girl grinned.

'I'm Stephen Handeler.'

'Hi, I'm Meredith.'

'I'm Toby McConnel.' McConnel smiled.

'You guys been on Reed's service?' asked Grace.

'Yeah.' Toby nodded. 'Well, I have at least.' He smirked.

'I thought you were on that service too.' Pouted Grace.

'I am.' Meredith sighed. 'Reed hates me.'

'Ew, jackass.' Frowned Georgia.

'He's cool.' Said Toby.

'Hmmmm.' Breathed Meredith, taking a bite of her salad.

'So you're Dr. White's sister in law?' Asked Stephen, glancing at Georgia.

'Oh… I… yeah.' Meredith nodded.

'You're Dr. White's sister in law?' Asked Grace. 'Wait, who's Dr. White?'

'Peds.' Nodded Georgia.

'She's my husbands sister.' Meredith nodded.

'You're married?' Grace raised her eyebrows.

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded. 'My husband is an intern too.'

'Here?' breathed Georgia.

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded. 'I haven't seen him all day.'

'Wait so your husband is an intern too?' asked Grace again.

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded, laughing slightly.

'Who?' she grinned. 'Is he hot?'

'Grace!' Meredith giggled.

'There was a really hot guy in the queue for the labs today… it could have been him!'

'He's hot.' Meredith nodded.

'What does he look like?' she breathed.

'What's he called?' asked Georgia.

'Derek.' She nodded. 'He's taller than me but not tall, and he has dark hair.'

'You have to point him out.' Georgia nodded. 'How long have you guys been together?'

'Eight years.' She breathed.

'Woah.' Said Grace. 'That's like… a long time.'

'Yeah.' Meredith smiled.

'How long have you been married?'

'Three years.'

'Wow.'

'Yeah.' Meredith laughed slightly. 'It's a long time.'

'And he's Dr. White's brother?'

'Yeah.' She nodded, before adding tentatively: 'And Dr. Sloans too….'

'Wait what?!' Grace almost spat out her juice. 'Dr. Sloan…. Our resident… is your husbands brother?'

'Yeah…' she nodded. 'I mean… not biologically… but yeah they're brothers.'

'What the fuck.' Breathed Toby. 'Is that even allowed?'

'Must be.' Meredith shrugged. 'They knew when we applied and I was assigned to him. I mean, maybe it explain why Derek's not got him.'

'Still favouritism.'

'Mark doesn't show me favouritism.' Meredith frowned. 'I've been doing rectal exams for the last two and a half hours while you've been working with an attending.'

'Hmmmm.' Toby shrugged.

'So your husband seems to have a lot of doctors in the family.' Said Stephen.

'Yeah,' Meredith laughed. 'His other sister is a resident at Boston gen.'

'Seriously?' breathed Grace.

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded. 'They're all really smart.'

'So if you two have been together eight years, when did you meet?'

'Freshman year.' Meredith grinned. 'We were in the same bio class.'

'That is so romantic.' Breathed Grace. 'And you've been together ever since?'

'Well, the end of freshman year.' Meredith nodded. 'Yeah.'

'That's amazing.' Sighed Georgia. 'I've never had a boyfriend longer than a year.'

'Poor Georgia.' Giggled Grace.

'Are you married?' Georgia turned to the other girl.

'No.' she shook her head. 'I'm seeing someone but it's not anything serious.'

'Can we talk about something else?' Toby frowned as Meredith saw Derek come through the cafeteria doors with some other interns. He was laughing as he made his way to the lunch line with them. He looked really happy, like, really happy. Which immediately shot her hopes of him having a worse day than her.

She waved at him as he picked up his tray and headed for a table. 'Der!'

'Oh,' she saw him look up at her and make his way over, pardoning himself from his new friends.

'Hey,' she breathed as he got closer.

'Hey,' he grinned, ducking down to kiss her quickly.

'Do you want to sit?' she asked.

'Sure,' he smiled, putting his tray next to hers and pulling up a spare chair before turning to the other interns at the table. 'Hi, I'm Derek.'

'Hi,' grinned Grace and Georgia.

'Hey,' nodded Steven.

'You okay?' he asked, wrapping an arm around Meredith and kissing her cheek.

'Yeah,' she whispered, leaning into him, even though she wasn't okay. 'Are you?'

'Great.' He grinned, kissing the top of her head. 'How's Mark?'

'Good.' She nodded.

'I'm glad it's you rather than me.'

'I know.' She giggled, reaching her hand to rest on his thigh, wanting to be as close to him as possible. 'Who's your resident?'

'Dr. Torres.' Derek nodded. 'I like her.'

'Good.' Meredith whispered. 'Have you done anything cool?'

'We got to help with her pre op this morning and watch a knee replacement she scrubbed in on.'

'That's cool.' Meredith nodded.

'You?'

'I'll talk to you later.' She whispered.

'Oh.. okay.' He murmured, squeezing her to him and kissing her head once again. 'Do you need a moment?' he whispered. 'Outside?'

'Please.' She nodded quietly, hoping none of the others would notice how suddenly close to tears she was feeling.

'Okay.' He breathed. 'Do you want me to get some of mom's cookies and we can sit outside? It's a nice day.'

'Yeah.' She whispered.

'Okay, let's go.' He reached for her hand.

'Der you lunch… we… I can wait.'

'You're more important than a salad, Mer.' He breathed, kissing her gently.

'I love you.' She whispered, squeezing his hand.

'It was nice to meet you guys,' Derek smiled. 'I'm just going to steal my wife for five minutes.'

'Okay.' Grinned Grace.

'See you later, Meredith.' Said Georgia.

'See you.' Meredith smiled weakly, picking up her tray and taking it to the stack.

'Hey,' Derek whispered as they walked down the corridor and he reached for her hand. 'Are you okay?'

'Yeah.' She murmured. 'Just want you.'

'Okay.' He breathed, squeezing her hand as they reached the locker room. 'Shall I just get the whole bag of cookies?'

'Please.' She nodded. 'I could do with a few.'

'Okay.' He murmured, picking up the bag and moving to hug her, holding her tightly. 'Let's go outside.'

'Yeah.' She nodded.

Derek walked her outside until they reached a bench that was just in the sunshine. He sat down before pulling her onto his lap and holding her close to him, kissing the top of her head.

'You're not okay.' He breathed.

'I'm fine.' She whispered.

'Mer….'

'Fine. I'm not okay.'

'What's wrong?' he murmured, kissing the top of her head again.

'I'm having a really bad day.' She whimpered, feeling her voice starting to waver.

'A bad day?' he murmured, squeezing her.

'Reed hates me. McConnel's an ass. And I've spent the last two hours doing rectal exams just wanting you to hold me.' She whispered.

'Oh Mer…. Reed doesn't hate you.'

'He does.'

'He doesn't.' Derek shook his head.

'No, he does.' She looked up at him, a single tear dropping down on to her cheek. 'He… he sent me to do the back log of rectal exams which apparently he does to all his worst interns and I… he likes McConnel and he's letting him do stuff and Georgia watched a liver transplant and you watched a knee replacement and I… he hates me and I….'

'He doesn't hate you. Baby he doesn't hate you.' Derek breathed, kissing the tear away from her cheek. 'It's the first day. It's not even been a whole day yet. We've been here six hours. The first six hours don't define who you are. You're going to be an incredible surgeon. It's your first day.'

'Derek…' she whispered, nestling her head in his neck.

'I know it's crap. I know you're having a crap day and I know McConnel's an ass and I know Reed's an ass. But Mark's not an ass. And you wont be on Reed's service forever, only the first shift. Do you want me to talk to Mark?'

'No,' she shook her head. 'Don't talk to Mark. Definitely don't talk to Mark.'

'Okay, okay.' He breathed. 'No Mark.'

'No Mark.' She shook her head. 'McConnel hates me for that too.'

'What?'

'Being related to my resident.'

'Hmmmm,' Derek breathed, cupping her face in his hands. 'McConnel's an ass. And he's gonna hate himself for being an ass when he realises he's working with one of the best interns in the program.'

'Derek…' she shook her head.

'I love you. And as soon as it's time for sleep you page me and come find me and we'll find a bed somewhere and we'll cuddle and in the morning, when it's time for pre rounds, it will be a new day.'

'Hmmmmm.' She breathed.

'I'm sorry I cant make it better.'

'It's okay.' She whispered. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.' He kissed her softly. 'I love you and you're a Rockstar and you're going to kick ass and make McConnel and Reed regret doubting you.'

'Hmmmm.'

'I love you.'

'I love you too.' She whispered, cuddling into his chest as he held her close.

 _Thank you for reading, please review X_


	2. Chapter 2

_Hi guys! I'm sorry it took a week but as usual I've had a hectic week and this has been worst than most. Thank you for reading and BIG thank you to those of you who have reviewed and especially to those who have stuck with me throughout these three stories._

Derek breathed in the scent of his wife's lavender smelling hair as he pulled her closer to him. They had about four hours to sleep before pre-rounds started and his wife's day had gone from bad to worse since he'd last seen her at lunch.

She'd been made to stand at the side while Toby McConnel had assisted Reed, and ran a few labs. But she seemed to be having a really hard time of it, she really didn't get on with Toby and for some reason Reed didn't like her and it was getting to Meredith more than it probably would normally, but this was their first day and she'd been eager to impress.

It didn't help that his shift was going really well. He had help diagnose a patient and seemed to be Dr. Torres' favourite over the other interns. But Meredith didn't need to know any of that, she needed to be held and kissed and told she was loved and so that's what he did. He was really hoping after a couple of hours sleep she'd be feeling better and would be able to get off on a better foot. And then they could go home and have a bath together, and he would cook her a nice dinner and then they could have a full nights sleep in their own bed and she could come back tomorrow ready to start again.

'Derek…' She whispered, turning over in the single on call bed they were sharing.

'Yeah?' he whispered, as to not wake the other doctor in the on-call room.

'What time is it?'

'Almost four.' He murmured, kissing her forehead.

'So we have a little bit?'

'Yeah we have about forty five minutes and then we can get ready for pre-rounds.'

'Kay.' She whispered, nuzzling his neck as she wrapped her leg around his.

'You okay?'

'Yeah.' She whispered, kissing his neck softly.

'Okay.'

'I don't want to get up again.'

'I know,' he murmured. 'I know.'

'Can we switch?'

'I wish we could,' he whispered, running his hand along her back. 'I'd do anything to make you happy.'

'I know.' She murmured. 'At least tomorrow I'll hopefully be on someone else's service.'

'You should be.' Derek nodded.

'Hmmmm.'

'I'll make us a nice dinner tonight.' He breathed.

'Hmmmm.' She grinned up at him.

'What do you want? I'll make you whatever you want.'

'Alfredo,' she breathed. 'with fried chicken.'

'Alfredo with dried chicken?' he laughed quietly.

'You said whatever I want.' She pouted.

'Fried chicken alfredo it is.' He nodded kissing her softly. 'And a bubble bath?'

'A bubble bath would be amazing.'

'Hmmmm.' He smiled, kissing her again. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.' She whispered. 'Are you okay?' she breathed, reaching to stroke his face softly.

'I'm good.' He murmured, kissing her cheek softly.

'You never told me about the rest of your day.'

'It was okay.' He nodded.

'Still getting on with Dr. Torres?'

'Yeah she's really cool.' He smiled. 'She's nice.'

'Hmmmm.' She breathed. 'Did you do anything else exciting?'

'Not really.' He shook his head, although it was a lie.

'Hmmmm.'

'You get some more sleep.' He breathed. 'You have another half hour.'

'I'd rather cuddle with you.' She whispered.

'We can cuddle while you sleep.' He kissed the top of her head. 'Get some rest.'

'Okay.' She sighed.

'Just think about when we get home.'

'You know what I've just realised?' she giggled.

'What?'

'It will be six am when our shift finishes, it wont be time for dinner.'

'I'll make it you anyway.' He promised.

'Chicken Alfredo at seven in the morning?' she laughed.

'Anything you want. Now get some sleep.'

'Kay.' She murmured. 'Love you.'

'Love you.' He squeezed her gently, closing his eyes after he watched hers drift shut.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDM

'Dr. Shepherd,'

'Yes Dr. Torres?' he replied, following her alongside the other interns down the corridor.

'You can join me on Dr. Robinson's service today. Neuro.'

'Really?' he grinned. 'Thanks.'

'Follow me.'

'Yes, Dr. Torres.' He nodded. 'Is everyone on a different service today?'

'Most people. But I cant speak for other residents assignments.'

'I see.' He nodded.

'I believe you're Mark Sloan's brother?' she laughed as they stepped into the elevator.

'I am.' He nodded.

'I wont ask how that works.'

'Oh… he's not my biological brother.' Derek explained. 'Unofficially adopted by my parents.'

'I see.' She chuckled. 'And now you're following in his surgeon footsteps?'

'Kind of. I mean, our sister's a paediatrician here, and me and Mark did start out together. We both did pre-med at Dartmouth but then me and my wife went to Europe for a year before med school. So Mark's ahead but we're the same age.'

'I see.' Callie nodded. 'How was Europe?'

'Amazing.' He breathed.

'Really? I've always wanted to go.'

'Yeah, it's something you have to do. Me and my wife want to do it again one day.'

'So you're married, huh? Mark didn't mention that.'

'Yeah,' Derek grinned. 'Meredith, she's an intern here too.'

'Oh wow. Is she a Shepherd too?'

'She is.' He laughed, nodding, as he followed her across to the tall guy wearing a scrub cap.

'Dr. Robinson,' Callie nodded. 'This is Dr. Shepherd, my intern.'

'Dr. Shepherd.' The guy nodded, smiling.

'What have we got.'

'A guy complaining of severe headaches and nausea. I'm suspecting an aneurysm so I need you to do a neuro exam and then take him up for both a CT and an MRI.'

'Okay.' Callie nodded. 'Dr. Shepherd do you want to go and inform the patient and I'll be in in a minute to oversee the exam?'

'Sure.' Derek nodded, taking the patient chart off Dr. Robinson and stepping inside the room. 'Hi, Mr… Callman, I'm Dr. Shepherd. Myself and Dr. Torres are going to give you an exam in just a couple of minutes and then take you up for a couple of scans.'

'Okay.' The patient nodded. 'Thank you, Dr. Shepherd.'

'And then depending upon the result Dr. Robinson will let you know the course of action.'

'Okay, thanks.' He nodded.

'Dr Shepherd,' smiled Callie as she walked in. 'Mr. Callman.' She nodded. 'Did Dr. Shepherd inform you of the scans we're going to be doing today.'

'He has.' Mr. Callman nodded. 'Can I get some painkiller for my head? It wont stop.'

'Yeah, sure.' She nodded. 'Dr. Shepherd, would you like to give Mr. Callman some morphine?'

'Yeah.' He nodded, moving to Mr. Callman's side.

'Okay, and push.' Callie instructed as he gave him the dose. 'Well done Dr. Shepherd.'

'Well done?' laughed Mr. Callman. 'What is it his first day or something?'

'Second.' Dr. Torres laughed. 'But don't worry Mr. Callman, you're in very good hands.'

'I should hope so.'

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

'Have we heard anything about the scrub in?' asked Jenny as she sat next to him at the table in the cafeteria.

'Nope.' Derek shook his head before turning to Dr. Torres' other interns. 'Have you guys?'

'Nope.' Sam shook his head.

'I'm being killed on Preston's service today.' Jenny groaned. 'I haven't stopped and my patients a pain in the ass.'

'What's wrong with them?'

'Only an appy.' She shrugged. 'But it's not scheduled until this afternoon and she's driving me insane. And Preston's got me monitoring her all day.'

'How old is she?' asked Sam.

'Twenty one. And a pain in the ass.'

'Who's service are you on?' Derek turned to Sam.

'Dr. Hond, Peds.'

'How is it?'

'Good, I like her.' He nodded. 'But I'm exhausted.'

'Me too.' Derek sighed. 'But we're three quarters of the way there.'

'True.' Sam agreed.

'And then we're here again tomorrow afternoon.' Jenny rolled her eyes.

'Welcome to internship.' Sam laughed.

'I wish it was time for residency already,' she sighed. 'I want to learn to cut, not wait on a stroppy twenty one year old and run labs.'

'Yeah.' Sam nodded.

'Do we know who was on Dr. Reeds service this morning?' Derek asked, taking a bite of his salad.

'I think it's still Meredith.' Jenny winced.

'It is?' Derek sighed.

'I saw her pushing a bed with Toby McConnel so I assume they're both on the same service again.'

'Crap.' Derek sighed.

'Is she still having a rough time?' Asked Sam.

'I haven't spoken to her since this morning but we was really down yesterday.'

'He seems tough.' Jenny nodded.

'Yeah,' Derek sighed. 'Sam are you going to eat your pudding cup?'

'I was going to….'

'What if I give you five bucks?'

'All yours.' He handed it over to him.

'Thanks.' Derek grinned.

'I didn't think you even liked pudding.' Jenny laughed.

'I don't,' he shook his head, laughing slightly. 'But this way Mer gets three rather than one.'

'Meredith is a very lucky lady.' Sighed Jenny. 'I wish I had someone to get me extra pudding cup when I'm having a bad day.'

'Dr. Shepherd,' came Dr. Robinson's voice from behind them.

'Dr. Robinson?' he turned around quickly. 'I… did I miss a page?'

'Not at all,' he shook his head. 'I'm sure you've heard about the intern scrub in on the first shift and I've cleared it with the chief. You'll be scrubbing in with me on my aneurism clipping this afternoon.'

'Oh….' Derek breathed his eyes going wide. 'I… Thank you, Dr. Robinson. Thank you.'

'I'll see you at OR two at three.'

'Of course.' Derek nodded as he watched Dr. Robinson walk away. 'Oh my god.' He turned to the other interns. 'Did that just happen?'

'Dude!' grinned Sam. 'you're scrubbing in!'

'Well done Derek!' grinned Jenny. 'And you're a neuro geek, right?'

'Right.' Derek laughed breathlessly. 'I am.' He nodded.

'This is so cool.' Sam clapped Derek on the back. 'You're the intern, Derek! Out of everyone, it's you.'

'I cant believe it.' He shook his head. 'I… I have to go find Mer.'

'Of course.' Jenny nodded. 'Take her my pudding cup too.' She breathed as she handed it to him.

'Thanks.' Derek grinned, taking it off her and heading in search of his wife. She'd been running a lot of labs yesterday so his first instinct was to check there, he made his way down the hall unable to take the grin off his face. He was so focused on getting there as fast as possible that he didn't realise his wife walking right towards him.

'Der,' she breathed, pulling his arm to bring him back as he walked straight past her.

'Mer!' he grinned.

'Hey,' she smiled.

'Are you free for lunch?'

'I have to go and give Mark some results and then I'm good.' She nodded.

'Good.' He grinned. 'Because I have a surprise for you.' He grinned, quickly looking around him before kissing her on the cheek.

'You do?' she giggled.

'I do.' He nodded. 'How's your day?'

'Not great.' She sighed. 'Reed still hates me.'

'Oh Mer,' he murmured, wanting to pull her into a hug. 'Let's go and find Mark and then we'll get lunch.'

'Okay.' She murmured. 'You're coming?'

'Yeah.' He breathed. 'I want to spend my lunch with my wife.'

'You're cheesy.' She giggled.

'Shush,' he laughed. 'Let's go.'

'Kay.' She breathed. 'So this surprise….'

'Yeah?' he grinned.

'Do I get a clue?'

'It's nothing big,' he shook his head. 'I just thought it would make you smile.'

'Hmmmm,' she smiled.

'And I have something else to tell you…. But I cant tell you now.'

'Two surprises?' she raised her eyebrow.

'Not really.' He shook his head, still grinning.

'Then why are you grinning about it and why cant you tell me?' she laughed as she led him to the elevator. 'Sloans on the third floor.'

'I can tell you but I don't want to tell you on the way to meet Mark.' He sighed as they stepped in the elevator.

'Tell me.' She pouted as he hit the button.

'No.' he chuckled.

'Derek, tell me.' She pouted, moving closer towards him. 'Please?' she tipped her head up to him and kissed him softly. 'I need some good news.'

'Fine.' He sighed, smiling. 'I… I'm scrubbing in.'

'What?' she breathed, her eyes going wide. 'Seriously?!' she squealed.

'Yeah,' he laughed. 'I'm scrubbing in on the aneurism this afternoon.'

'Derek!' she wrapped her arms around him, kissing him hard. 'You're scrubbing in?'

'I'm scrubbing in.' he echoed, his arms holding her close to him as she kissed him again.

'Derek that's amazing!'

'I know.'

'I'm so proud of you.' She whispered, running her hand through his hair.

'Thanks.' He grinned. 'I'm proud of you too,' he breathed. 'You're hanging in there.'

'Thanks.' She murmured, as the elevator doors opened. 'I'm so proud of you.'

'Thanks.'

'I'll get to watch, right?' she asked as they headed out of the elevator and down the hall.

'I think so.' He nodded.

'I cant wait.' She breathed. 'Oh, there's Mark, I'll be two seconds.'

'Okay.' He nodded.

'I wish I could kiss you.' She giggled, before turning and walking to give Mark the lab results in her pocket.

'Shep!' he grinned, calling him over.

'Yeah?' he asked, coming up behind Meredith and placing a hand on her back even though he knew It was inappropriate.

'I believe congratulations are in order, your wife just told me about your aneurism clipping.'

'Yeah.' He laughed.

'Congrats, man.' He clapped him on the back slightly.

'Thanks.'

'I'll be watching like a proud mom.' Mark smirked.

'I can't wait.' Derek rolled his eyes.

'Now go get lunch you two, get the goo fest over.'

'Goo fest?' Derek laughed.

'You know,' Mark shrugged. 'Her telling you how proud she is and you going all mushy saying you wouldn't have been able to do anything else without her, and then you make out for about five hours even though you're thirty.'

'Shut up.'

'You know it's true.' Mark smirked. 'Go, get outta here. And I don't want to hear anything about my interns getting nasty in an on call room.'

'Shut up.' Derek rolled his eyes again, pulling on Meredith's hand as they walked away. 'He's so annoying.'

'He's your brother.' Meredith giggled.

'Hmmmm.'

'I cant believe you're the intern scrubbing in.' she breathed, squeezing his hand. 'You're scrubbing in.'

'And it's neuro.'

'I'm so proud of you.'

'I love you.' He kissed her cheek as they made their way down the stairs.

'I love you too.' She grinned. 'But you should probably stop touching me before someone sees.'

'Okay.' He sighed.

'We'll eat our lunch outside so you can touch me all you want.' She giggled.

'Good.' He grinned. 'I've already eaten but the surprise is I've got you three extra pudding cups, so you'll have four.'

'Seriously?' she laughed.

'Yeah.' He nodded, before adding quickly. 'I've just realised that's a really bad surprise.'

'It's not.' She shook her head quickly, turning to him. 'It's a great surprise.'

'I thought it might make you feel a bit better.'

'It's a lovely gesture and very you.' She nodded. 'But I am happier about your surgery.'

'Well in my defence that happened later.' He laughed.

'I love it.' She grinned. 'Thank you for my pudding.'

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	3. Chapter 3

_Hi guys, here is the next chapter. I should be able to update more regularly for the next couple of weeks so I'm going to try really hard to take advantage of my free time! Thank you for reading and I hope you like this chapter. Thank you so much to Patsy for your review! It would be great if more of you guys could review and let me know what you think whether you've followed all of these stories from the beginning or whether you're new to them and have only just caught up!_

'You ready?' Derek asked as she came through the living room with her shoes in her hands.

'Yeah.' She nodded, siting down on the couch to put them on. 'We're not too late, are we?'

'No,' he shook his head. 'But I told mom we were exhausted last night when she called, so I don't think she'd be mad if we were late anyway.'

'Exhausted is an understatement.' She sighed, tying her converse and standing up to kiss him before grabbing her jacket. 'I'm ready.' She nodded.

'Okay, lets go.' He breathed, taking his keys in his hand and locking their apartment door behind her.

It was Sunday family dinner, and it was a miracle they'd both landed the same shifts, finishing at midnight the night before and not in until five Monday morning. When they'd gotten home last night Derek had picked them up a pizza and then they'd passed out in bed.

She was exhausted, they both were. After their first shift as interns, Derek had done exactly as he had promised. He had taken her home and ran her a bath before cooking her chicken alfredo for when she'd done. Then they'd kissed and cuddled in bed before falling asleep. Derek was on such a high from scrubbing in that it made her forget all about her crappy day with Reed.

Getting to watch him in the OR and totally kill it was the best feeling in the world. He looked amazing all scrubbed in with his hair tied in a scrub cap, and he had stood assisting Robinson and Torres throughout the aneurism clipping. People had expected him to fuck up, people were saying he'd blotch it, but he didn't. She had sat with Grace and Georgia and watched her husband with pride.

Unfortunately, the rest of her day hadn't been as elating. Reed definitely didn't like her. And she had a feeling it was something to do with her being a woman. She knew as an intern she'd have to do crappy jobs but he totally dismissed her and didn't even look at her when he was talking to her. She thought all the chauvinist crap had no place in hospitals, but apparently it did.

The rest of the week had gone more her way, she'd been on Dr. Hond's paediatrics service the next day, who was really friendly, especially when she found out Lara was her sister in law. It had given her a boost to not be constantly put down all day, and she was with Grace rather than Toby which was a lot easier.

Georgia and Grace were both really nice, and they were both really good. She and Grace had also been on Dr. Robinson's service yesterday, and were again tomorrow. She understood why Derek liked him so much. He was tough but friendly and she really enjoyed her shift yesterday, so was looking forward to be back on his service the next day.

As for now they were on their way to Alison's house, and she couldn't actually wait. It was going to be so nice having dinner cooked for them, because even though Derek made the most amazing meals, she felt bad that it all came down to him because of her limited kitchen skills. They'd managed to have a lie in and catch up on some much-needed sleep, and when they came home Derek had promised her sex.

He pulled up outside his moms, and kissed her on the cheek before hopping out, waiting for her to do the same. She joined him walking up the driveway, her hand slipping in his.

'I'm starving.' She giggled.

'Me too.' He laughed as his mom opened the door.

'There you two are! Come in!'

'Hi Ma,' Derek grinned, kissing her on the cheek and hugging her tightly before Meredith did the same.

'You both look tired,' Alison said, concerned.

'First week of internship,' Derek shrugged. 'You should know after Mark.'

'I know,' Alison sighed. 'But you do look particularly tired, and you seem to have lost some weight.'

'I'm fine, ma.' Derek rolled his eyes.

'Hmmmm.'

'He has lost weight, hasn't he Meredith?' she turned to her. 'At least since I've seen him?'

'I think so.' She nodded sheepishly, before turning to her husband. 'only a little.'

'Great.' He sighed, turning to go into the living room where his siblings were sat, except Liv who was living in Boston. 'Jack! Hello little man.' He grinned, walking right over to where Lara and Joe's baby boy was playing on the floor and picking him up.

'Aw, he's happy now his uncle Derek's here.' Lara grinned. 'Hey Der.'

'And his Aunt Meredith,' Derek whispered excitedly to the baby, kissing his cheek and turning to her. Every single time Derek held Jack her heart melted. They were absolutely adorable together and she was pretty sure her husband's eyes lit up in a way she'd never seen before.

'Here's my guy,' she breathed, joining Derek and allowing Jack to take her finger in his tiny hand as he giggled. 'Hey Jack.' She whispered, kissing his nose.

'How come he goes all happy when those two arrive but whenever I hold him he cries?' Imogen rolled her eyes.

'We're his favourites, get over it.' Derek winked at her.

'Shut up. Anyway, I feel like we haven't seen the two of you in ages.'

'We were literally here last week.' Said Derek as he and Meredith sat down on the love seat in the corner of the room with Jack on his knee. '

'Yeah and we've had no communication with you since.'

'They've been slave to the hospital.' Winked Mark. 'And technically Grey's been a slave to me.'

'Please never say that again.' Derek winced as his sisters laughed.

'What, you're Mark's resident, Mer?' asked Claire.

'For my sins.' She giggled.

'You better not be making her life hell Mark.' Warned Lara. 'Patricia said you were great on her service the other day, Mer.' She grinned.

'Really?' Meredith breathed.

'Yeah, she said you and the other intern really pulled your weight.

'Grace.' Meredith nodded.

'Which one's that?' Mark asked.

'Carr.' She nodded. 'She's really good.'

'And did Derek tell you his big news, Ma?' asked Lara.

'Of course he did.' Alison grinned.

'What big news?' frowned Imogen.

'He got to scrub in.' Meredith smiled proudly. 'On a neuro surgery.'

'Oh my god Der! That's amazing!'

'On his first day.' Meredith grinned, kissing her husband quickly as he pulled her close.

'He was damn good.' Mark nodded.

'How come we're only just hearing about this now?' Demanded Claire. 'This is huge news Der!'

'We've kind of been living at the hospital,' he sighed, holding Jack close. 'I didn't have time to ring everyone.'

'So you guys are burnt out?' asked Imogen, sympathetic.

'Yeah,' Meredith nodded, her hand resting on Derek's thigh near Jack's feet. 'We finished at midnight though, so we've had a good ten hours in bed today.'

'And how much of that contained sleeping?' Mark winked at them.

'Mark.' Groaned Derek.

'I'm just saying, residency is about to fuck up your bunny habits.'

'My bunny habits are non of your business.' Replied Derek.

'And they're not fucked up at all so far.' Meredith giggled, squeezing her hand on Derek's thigh.

'Can we please stop talking about Derek's sex life in front of my child?' Asked Lara. 'It's disturbing enough let alone when the two of you have my child.'

'Sorry.' Meredith giggled.

'I still don't understand why he likes Derek so much,' Imogen groaned. 'I can bet if I had a hold of him for as long as Derek has he still wouldn't have stopped crying.'

'Because Derek's good with kids,' Claire shrugged. 'He practically raised you and Liv.'

'We weren't babies,' Imogen frowned.

'No but you were young.'

'Derek being good with teenagers does not explain why my own nephew hates me.' Imogen pouted.

'Imogen Sofia, you really haven't gotten any less dramatic as you have gotten older.' Alison sighed. 'Jack doesn't hate you at all.'

'Do you want a hold?' Derek asked his youngest sister.

'I'll only make him cry.'

'Oh Im, for gods sake's take him.' Lara rolled her eyes.

'But then you'll have to get him to stop crying.'

'I'll just give him back to Derek.' Lara laughed.

'Ah, of course. The baby whisperer.' Imogen said sarcastically, standing up to take her nephew off her brother.

'There you go,' Derek whispered, handing her the baby.

'Hey Jack,' Imogen murmured as the baby sniffled.

'See,' Derek breathed, wrapping his arms around Meredith as he pulled her into his lap as he sat back down. 'He's fine.'

'I know.' Imogen smiled, surprised, as she sat down with Jack cradled in her arms.

'There you go, Im.' Lara beamed, just as Jack began to cry from his spot in Imogen's arms.

'You have got to be kidding!' Imogen groaned. 'Jack baby please shhhhh.'

'Rock him.' Lara murmured as Imogen tried her best to calm the upset baby.

'Shhhh, it's okay, you're okay…'

'I guess he does hate you Im.' Claire laughed.

'Shut up.'

'Derek, do you want him back?' asked Lara.

'Mer can have him.' Derek smiled, kissing the top of Meredith's head softly.

'Come on Mer, make him stop.' Begged Imogen as she bounced him up and down in her arms.

'Okay.' Meredith giggled, moving from Derek's lap to take Jack from her sister in law.

'Oh hey baby,' she breathed, cuddling him into her chest. 'Shhh.'

'I swear if he calms down for her, he definitely hates me.' Imogen groaned.

'That's it,' Meredith breathed as Jack's cries began to lessen. 'Let's sit with Uncle Derek and have a cuddle.' She whispered, kissing his head as she moved to sit back with Derek who opened an arm for her to nestle into with his nephew. 'There we go.' She grinned as Derek moved his other hand to join hers which was holding Jack close to her.

'This is why I hate you guys becoming residents now,' sighed Lara. 'who else am I going to ask to babysit when mom's busy?'

'I would say me,' Imogen rolled her eyes. 'But he hates me.'

'He doesn't hate you!' Lara laughed.

'Why can't Claire?' asked Derek as Meredith rested her head on his chest, the baby still nestled in her arms.

'The chances of Claire being free are lower than Jack being quiet for Im.' Lara laughed.

'Wow thanks La.' Groaned Imogen.

'I'm only kidding. Can't you guys just quit the hospital and become sitters?'

'I wish.' Meredith giggled.

'We'll have him when we're off.' Smiled Derek.

'Don't be stupid, you'll be exhausted. The only time residents leave the hospital is after their eighty hour limit, and I am not letting my child be sat by people who are practically the walking dead.'

'But we love having him.' Derek murmured, stroking Jack's face softly.

'And he obviously loves you guys.' Laughed Joe softly.

'Why does it look like he's literally Mer and Der's kid right now?' laughed Claire.

'He literally does.' Laughed Lara, agreeing.

'He's perfect.' Meredith smiled.

'You do both look wonderful with a baby.' Alison smiled warmly.

'Ma,' Derek groaned.

'I know, Derek, I know. Not until after your residency.' She sighed. 'But I'm just saying you do look wonderful. And I am allowed to be excited about my future grandchildren.'

'You have a [resent grandchild to be excited about now.' Cut in Lara.

'Oh Lara, of course I'm excited about Jack,' Alison laughed slightly. 'I love him dearly, I'm simply saying Meredith and Derek will make wonderful parents.'

'Ma…' Derek repeated. 'Please.'

'Okay, I'll stop now.' She sighed.

'Thank you.' He murmured, kissing Meredith's cheek before whispering a 'Sorry.' In her ear.

It was crazy, being sat with her nephew in her arms and her husband cuddling her tightly, talking about their future kids. She and Derek loved Jack, and she agreed with Alison that Derek was going to be an amazing dad. She could see their future with their kids so clearly and she wished residency would hurry up and be over so she could have mini Derek's running around her house.

Derek had already told her his mom would want them to have kids sooner, and not to take any notice. They'd decided to wait until after residency when they'd both be in more control of their hours and would be in a better financial position. But Meredith didn't know if she could wait that long. It wasn't that she wanted a baby right now, because they definitely weren't ready. Internship was going to be a long year and they were barely being paid anything. But five years seemed a long time to wait before they even started trying. It wasn't something to be discussed now, anyway.

But this was the perfect day off after such a long week. Seeing her family and holding her nephew, before her husband took her home and made love to her, life couldn't be better right now.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	4. Chapter 4

_Hi guys! For some reason this chapter was not for uploading, I don't know if it was the site or the file but it took so long to go through. As always thank you so much for reading and thank you so much to Pasty for your kind review as always! It would be really nice if more of you reviewed, I see you all reading and would love to know all your thoughts!_

 _Merder are insanely cute in this chapter, but I'm afraid I'm about to ruin it really soon. So I'm sorry in advance._

It had been another thirty six hour sift. Another long thirty six hour shift. They seemed to be the only shifts he was on these days, two weeks into his internship and he was already learning how to run on a lack of sleep. Meredith had the day off, she'd hit the eighty hour limit the day before and so was at home in their apartment waiting for him.

She had texted him to tell him she would cook dinner for him, but then later sent him a message saying she was just going to order in instead. He was more than happy with that, because although he loved his wife dearly, she could not cook to save her life.

He just wanted to go home and fall asleep in her arms, although he knew the minute he saw her he would get his second wind. He hadn't seen her in a whole day, and now that she was enjoying internship as much as he was, he wanted to talk about his day with her and tell her everything.

She was doing really well now, she hadn't been on Reed's service since the first two days, and although she was bound to be with him again at some point, she'd impressed every other attending so far. Having his brother as her resident didn't initially seem like a good idea, but his reassurance that Meredith was doing well was a perk.

He sighed as he rubbed his eyes before getting out of the car and walking to the entrance of their apartment building, he was so tired. He didn't want to be tired. He wanted to spend some time with his wife and possibly have some sex, but right now the only thing he was in the mood for was a nap. Although, Meredith holding him and running her fingers through his hair until he fell asleep was one of the best things in the world, even if it wasn't sex.

'Oh, hey!' she grinned as he came through the door. 'Sorry Holl, Der's home. Can I call you back later?' she asked into her cell. 'Okay, bye.'

'Hey.' He smiled, walking over to where she was lay on the couch and kissing her softly.

'Hey,' she continued to grin, wrapping her arms around his neck. 'I missed you.'

'I missed you too.' He breathed, looking over at the brown paper bag on their kitchen table. 'Is that our food?'

'It is.' She nodded. 'I got us Thai.'

'Thai sounds really good right now.' He almost moaned, imagining the food.

'You sit and I'll plate up.' She said, kissing him quickly. 'You look really tired.'

'I am really tired.' He agreed, flopping on to the couch as she got their plates out of the cupboard.

'Were you still on Hond's service?' she asked, pouring him a glass of water.

'Yeah.' He sighed. 'We lost a kid.'

'Oh, Der.' She breathed, handing him the water. 'Are you okay?'

'I'm fine.' He nodded. 'Just tired and sad.'

'We can have an early night.'

'Are you sure? We haven't spent any time together this week, tonight was supposed to be us time.'

'It is us time,' she shrugged. 'we're going to eat, then we can have a bubble bath together, and then we can get in bed so you can sleep.'

'I know, but me sleeping isn't much fun for you.'

'Getting to cuddle with you as you fall asleep is fun.' She murmured, putting his plate of takeout on the table. 'Come on, eat.'

'Okay.' He sighed.

'And anyway, maybe we could have some slow tub sex. Or are you too tired for anything?'

'I want sex.' He insisted as he sat opposite her. 'I'm just exhausted I don't know if my body will co-operate.'

'It's okay,' she murmured. 'We'll see, okay?'

'Okay.' He nodded, taking a bite of his food. 'This is so good.'

'Are you okay with the shrimp?'

'Yeah, you know it's my favourite.'

'I know I do.' She breathed, reaching run her hand through his hair across the table, resting it in the curls at the nape of his neck. 'What time are you in tomorrow?'

'Pre-rounds.' He sighed. 'So up at four.'

'You really do look exhausted.' She moved her hand to cup his cheek softly.

'I know.'

'I'm in for pre-rounds too.' She murmured, moving back to eat her own food. 'Do you want me to drive us in tomorrow?'

'I really don't mind.' He shrugged. 'I'm on another twenty four hour shift tomorrow.'

'So you'll be done for pre-rounds?'

'Yeah.' He sighed.

'I'm on a thirty six.'

'You can drive us in and then I'll come home and nap and pick you up.'

'Are you sure?'

'More than.' He nodded.

'But then what are you going to do when I come home and sleep?'

'I'll make your dinner for when you get back and then I'll be as amazing as you are about needing sleep.'

'Hmmm.' She smiled. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.'

'I can't believe how domesticated we are.' She giggled.

'Me neither.' He laughed.

'I know we've been married for three years but now I really feel married.' She grinned.

'I know,' he nodded. 'Don't you think it's weird how this is our second home together.'

'So weird.' She nodded.

'I like it here.'

'Me too.' She nodded. 'I really like it.'

'And its in such a good location for the hospital.'

'Definitely.' She agreed.

'It's perfect for us.'

'It is.' He grinned.

'I know... I know we're talking years from now but... when we have a baby... we're going to need a house, right?'

'Do you want a house?'

'I... I think so.' She nodded, chewing her lip slightly.

'Then by the time our baby arrives we shall be happy in our house.' He smiled, his heart squeezing at the kid talk. His mom had been dropping hints about them having kids for almost a year now, but they'd both agreed it would be best to wait until after their residency had finished.

'Good.' She whispered, a smile tugging at her lips. 'I can't wait.'

'For our house?'

'Our babies.' She giggled.

'Oh,' he breathed, smiling with her. 'Me neither.'

'I... I...' his wife breathed before trailing off and shaking her head.

'What?'

'I... nothing...'

'Mer,' he tilted his head.

'I just...' she trailed off, settling her fork down on her plate. 'Since the other day at your moms...'

'Mer, don't let Ma freak you out or pressure you.'

'No,' she shook her head quickly. 'No, no she hasn't freaked me out or pressured me.'

'Mer...' he sighed.

'I don't want to wait.' She blurted. 'I know we said we'd wait until after our residency was finished and we had more time on our hands and more money and... but I don't want to wait.'

'Mer...' he breathed, his heart racing.

'I don't want them now. Like... not right now,' his perfect wife continued. 'I just... maybe third year? Rather than after fifth? I just... I want us to have a family, Der.'

'I want that too.' He beamed, still not wrapping his head around anything she just said.

'I don't want it to be some... distant, future thing anymore. I want us to have a baby this time in three years, one we've planned for and saved for and... I want us to have a baby, Derek.'

'Come here,' he whispered, pushing his chair back from the table.

'What?' She laughed, confused.

'I don't want to have baby talk with you all the way over there come over here and sit on my lap.'

'Oh...' she giggled, tears forming in her eyes as she got up and placed herself on his lap, her arms going around his neck as he snaked his own around her waist and held her close.

'Hi,' he whispered.

'Hi,' she giggled, leaning so close to him their noses were touching.

'You really want this?' He murmured softly, his hand rubbing her back gently.

'Yeah,' she nodded. 'Do you... do you not?'

'No, no I do.' He shook his head. 'But even if I didn't... if you wanted it I'd do it anyway.'

'I love you.' She breathed, leaning into him and resting her head in the crook of his neck.

'I love you too.' He kissed the top of her head.

'So you want a baby in third year?'

'Yeah.' She whispered.

'You want to be pregnant then or have our baby by then?'

'Pregnant.' She nodded, taking a hold of his hand and bringing it to rest on her abdomen with her own. 'With your baby.'

'Our baby.' He corrected, grinning and kissing her deeply.

'So we start trying at the beginning of third year?'

'Sounds good to me.' she nodded.

'I'm looking forward to trying.' He smirked, kissing her again.

'I bet you are.' She giggled against his lips.

'Don't tell me you're not excited too.' He pouted.

'I'm very excited.' She giggled, tracing his cheeks with her fingertips. 'But we don't need getting pregnant as an excuse to have sex.'

'True.' He smirked.

'I love you so much.'

'I love you too.'

'Hmmm.' She sighed happily, resuming her position with her head in his neck.

'So, you want to start saving?'

'Yeah.' She whispered. 'I mean, I know this year we're not earning a lot and now we're back in New York I want to be spending time with your family so I don't want to crazy save that we have to turn down stuff like we did for Europe.'

'Hmmmm.' He nodded.

'Just, like… put a little aside each month. We can save more next year. And the year after.'

'I don't know if we'll be able to afford a house in two years.' He admitted.

'I… a house isn't necessary right away.' She shook her head.

'You want a house before the baby.' He breathed, tightening his arms around her.

'I know I do,' she sighed. 'But we have two bedrooms, we can manage until we have the second one.'

'Second one.' He grinned, squeezing her.

'I know.' She giggled.

'Are you sure?'

'Yeah.' She whispered. 'I want a baby more than a house.'

'I'll try and get us a house.'

'I know you will.' She reached for his hand that was around her waist. 'But if we don't… here is fine.'

'Hmmmmm.' He smiled, taking in the scent of her lavender scented hair.

'I just… I imagine us at work at the hospital… residents, assisting in surgeries like you did with Robinson, and then picking our baby up from daycare and driving home with him or her and you cooking dinner and us all cuddling and us putting them to bed and…. I just want it.'

'I want it too.' He kissed her softly.

'I love you so much.'

'I love you too.'

'Do you think Lara and Joe will have another one?'

'Yeah.' Derek nodded.

'I hope they have a girl.'

'Why?' he laughed softly.

'So we can practice with both.'

'True.' He laughed. 'Not that you need practice, you're great with babies.'

'Baby.' She corrected. 'The only baby I've ever known is Jack.'

'And you're great with him.' He pointed out.

'More like you're great with him and he likes me by association.'

'Don't be stupid. He loves you.'

'I love him.' She murmured. 'Hopefully our kid likes Imogen more than he does.' She giggled.

'Oh God. If they don't then I'll never hear the end of it.' Derek rolled his eyes.

'It would be funny.'

'It would until I got hit.'

'That would be funny for me too.' She giggled.

'Well that's just rude,' he pouted. 'You're not supposed to want to see your husband hurt.'

'Whatever.' She laughed.

'Hmmmm.'

'What?' she looked up at him.

'Nothing,' he whispered, kissing her again, lingering on her lips.

'Derek….' She breathed into his mouth.

'What?'

'Nothing.' She looked at him, her eyes sparkling as he felt her body begin to heat.

'Shall we run the bath now?' he smirked, running his hands along her side.

'Yeah,' she nodded. 'You. Naked. Bath. Now.'

'Hmmmm.' He grinned as his wife jumped off him and held her hand out to him before leading him into the bathroom.

 _Thank you so much for reading! Please review! X_


	5. Chapter 5

_Hi guys! Don't say I don't treat you... what can I say, it's Christmas! I hope you enjoy this update. Thank you so much for reading and thank you so much for all the reviews on the last chapter they really gave me a boost! If I don't update before Monday I hope you all have a lovely Christmas!_

Today was a good day, it was a more than good day. Meredith was feeling great about today. She'd been busy ever since pre rounds doing patient work ups and had been working with Dr. Hond on a consult and was due to scrub in on her surgery this afternoon.

She and Derek were both on call and she secretly loved squeezing in a tiny bed with him when they were both exhausted. Having him hold her so close and being so cosy in a single bed felt strangely closer than in a double. It was probably because he had no choice but to cuddle her otherwise he'd fall out of bed. Not that he didn't cuddle her every night anyway, he was a good cuddle.

'Dr. Grey!' Called Mark as she walked down the hall.

'Dr. Sloan,' she turned around to see Mark walking toward her.

'I was just about to page you,'

'Oh,' she breathed. 'Is everything okay?'

'Yeah.' He nodded. 'The chief has asked to see you in his office.'

'The chief?' She frowned, her heart freezing. That didn't sound good.

'Yeah,' Mark nodded.

'Why? What for?' She asked quickly.

'I don't know.' Mark shook his head. 'He didn't say what it was about, just that it was urgent.'

'Urgent?' She stuttered.

'Yeah,' he nodded. 'He didn't seem pissed. So I guess that's a good thing, but he wouldn't tell me what it was about. I tried to dig.'

'Oh... thanks.'

'It's okay. Are those the labs you're running for Hond?'

'Yeah.' She nodded. 'We think there might be an elevated white cell count.'

'In her space kid?'

'Yeah.' She nodded.

'Okay, I'll take those. You go to the chief.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yeah, you go.'

'Okay,' she breathed. 'Thanks Mark.'

'No problem Grey, let me know how it goes.'

'Of course.' She nodded to her brother before turning around and walking in the complete opposite direction. The chief. The chief? What could the chief possibly want? Whatever it was it surely wasn't good if it was urgent.

She couldn't think for the life of her what it could be. She'd seen chief Harvey around the hospital but never interacted with him properly. Not enough for him to have a problem with her in the programme, not unless someone had told him something. But that wouldn't make sense either, because she'd had no problems with any of the attendings, or the residents since she'd been on Dr. Reed's service, and surely a meeting a month later would be too delayed for it to be that.

Maybe it was Derek. They'd tried to keep their relationship as professional as possible at work but it was impossible to completely ignore the fact he was her husband. Especially at lunch and overnight when they spent their time together. Maybe they'd been too affectionate somewhere or maybe someone had told him something about them. She was wracking her brains as she approached his office.

'Come in,' she heard his voice come from the other side after she knocked. 'Dr. Grey.'

'Chief Harvey,' she nodded nervously. 'Dr. Sloan said you wished to speak with me.'

'I did,' he nodded. 'Please take a seat.' He gestured to the chair opposite his desk.'

'Of course.' She said quickly, sitting down.

'I... I don't know quite how to tell you this, Meredith.'

'Oh...'

'I got a call today from a friend of mine in Seattle, Dr. Richard Webber, Chief of surgery at Seattle Grace hospital.'

'Oh.' She had no idea where this was going but she was sure her mother was going to be involved somehow.

'He asked me to pass on a message to Dr. Meredith Grey, who he believed started her residency here.'

'Yeah.' She nodded.

'Of course there was no Dr. Grey on my records. Only a Dr. Meredith Shepherd.'

'Yeah.' She repeated.

'He said he had some unfortunate news about your mother. Who I'm assuming is Dr. Ellis Grey?'

'I... yes sir.' She nodded, feeling nauseous. She'd managed so well to keep her mother's name separate from her own since she'd married Derek. No one at Sinai knew they were related at all.

'Of course this came as a shock to me, to not know that I have the daughter of the best general surgeon in the country in my own residency programme.'

'I... I don't have a lot of contact with my mother sir.' She explained quickly.

'I see.' He nodded. 'I... I wish I had better news.'

'What?' She frowned. 'What is she dead or something? Has my mom died?' She said, panicked.

'Oh, no.' Dr Harvey shook his head. 'But I... Richard explained that she was suspended on leave of absence almost eighteen months ago.'

'What?' Meredith frowned. 'She was suspended from the hospital? For what?'

'She was diagnosed with early on set Alzheimer's,' Dr. Harvey continued. 'She finished work and told Richard that she had contacted you and that you were looking after her.'

'No... I... I haven't spoken to my mom in almost three years... just after I got married.'

'To the other Dr. Shepherd,' Dr Harvey nodded.

'I... so she's had Alzheimer's all this time?'

'I'm afraid so.' Dr Harvey sighed. 'Richard said he realised she hadn't actually contacted you a couple of months ago when he went to visit her as she and her house were in bad shape. He says she needs full time care. Which means she needs you. Whether that's you taking care of her or putting her in a home, she isn't Richards responsibility, as much as he wants to help.'

'She... a home?' Meredith whispered. 'It's that bad?'

'Alzheimer's is for want of a better word, a bitch, I'm afraid, Meredith.'

'I... so I have to go and see her?'

'Unfortunately. Homes aren't simple or cheap, you'll need to go out there to sign the paperwork and put the things in place you see fit.'

'I... I see...'

'Richard left me his cell number for you,' Dr Harvey passed her a piece of paper with a number scrawled on.

'I... thanks.' She nodded.

'I know this is a lot to take in,' he sighed.

'I... yeah...'

'And u know it may take some time, and so once you've sorted flights let me know and you can take the week to be in Seattle. Providing you put in some extra hours when you come back of course.'

'Of course.' She nodded quickly. 'Thank you, thank you chief.'

'No problem.'

'Would... I know it's a lot to ask... but would Derek be able to have the week too? I... I can't really do this without him.'

'I'm sure that can be arranged.' He nodded.

'Thank you.' She whispered.

'You can also take the next few hours off to ring Richard and make any arrangements you need to.'

'Thank you.'

'You're welcome.' Dr Harvey sighed as Meredith stood and pushed her chair under the desk. 'Take care, Meredith.'

'Thanks.' She nodded before turning out of his office and slumping against the door. Her mom had Alzheimer's. She had Alzheimer's and needed to be in a home.

Meredith needed to find Derek. She needed to find him and tell him and he would just make things better. He would hug her and tell her it was all going to be okay and that he would help her and he would know what to do. He was a family person. He was good at this stuff. He would be much more use than she would in this situation. So she needed to find him and she needed him to tell her what to do.

She made her way down the hallway, Richard's cell number in her fingers. As she turned the corner, Mark came walking down in the opposite direction.

'Hey!' he asked, coming over to her.

'Hey,' she breathed, shoving the piece of paper in her pocket.

'Have you seen the Chief?'

'Yeah. Yeah.' she nodded.

'What did he want?'

'Oh, nothing.' she shook her head.

'Nothing?' he frowned. 'It didn't seem like nothing.'

'Well... it was something but I need to talk to Derek first.' she mumbled.

'Okay.' Mark nodded carefully. 'But you're not getting kicked out or anything, right?'

'Oh, no.' she shook her head. 'No. Not kicked out.'

'Good. You okay?'

'Yeah. Yeah.' she nodded. 'You haven't seen Derek have you?'

'No,' Mark sighed.

'Okay. The chief said I could have a couple of hours off. So I'm going to go and find Der, if you see him will you tell him I'm looking for him?'

'Of course.' he nodded. 'Are you sure you're okay?'

'No.' she whimpered, holding back her tears as Mark squeezed her shoulder. 'But I will be once I've found Der.'

'Okay then.' Mark nodded. 'If I see him I'll tell him.'

'Thanks.' Meredith whispered, feeling her voice about to break.

'No problem, look after yourself Grey.'

'I will.' she tried to smile before turning to page Derek and heading for the cafeteria in search of him when the elevator doors opened and her husband stepped out. 'Derek!' she breathed, not being able to hide the relief that came over her as she laid eyes on him.

'Hey,' he grinned, walking toward her. 'Mer,' he frowned as he got closer. 'You okay?'

'No.' she murmured. 'Are you busy?'

'I... yeah.' he sighed. 'Why what's up?'

'I cant tell you here.' she shook her head, looking around at the busy hospital floor. 'I... do you have ten minutes?'

'I have to do a patient work up but then I can probably squeeze some time.' he winced. 'Is that okay?'

'Yeah.' she nodded. 'Can I come with you?'

'Of course.' he nodded. 'You're worrying me.'

'Dont be worried.' she said quickly. 'I'm fine. I just need to talk to you. So can we go do this work up?'

'Sure.' he nodded. 'This way.'

'Kay.' she followed him as he pressed a hand to her back gently.

'Are you having a bad day?'

'I wasn't.' she mumbled. 'I was having a great day.'

'Until?'

'I... Mark said the chief wanted to speak with me.'

'The chief?' Derek frowned. 'Wait, you're not in trouble, are you?'

'No.' she said quickly. 'It's not that.'

'Then what is it?'

'I can't tell you yet,'

'Why? You're not ill are you?' he suddenly asked, panicked.

'No,' she shook her head. 'I... I'm fine.'

'You're not fine, Mer.'

'Well not fine fine but medically fine.'

'Good.' he sighed in relief as the arrived at his patient bed. 'Are you okay here for ten minutes while I do this?'

'Yeah.' she nodded.

'Okay,' he murmured, kissing her cheek softly then looking around to check no one saw. 'I love you. I'll be ten minutes okay?'

'Okay.' she smiled at him as he squeezed her hand before pulling back the patients curtain and greeting them. He was so good with patients, his bedside manner was probably better than any other intern. Seeing how the little boy in the bed was doing everything Derek asked and remaining calm made her so proud to call him her husband. He was answering all the parents questions as he put in a central line and she chewed her lip anxiously as she waited for him.

When he'd done he pulled the curtains back around the little boy and ran to put his chart on the nurses' station before joining her side.

'All done,' he breathed. 'On call room?'

'An empty one.' she nodded.

'Okay.' he murmured.

'This one's empty.' she pointed out to the first one down the hall.

'Okay,' he nodded, following her in. 'Shall I lock the door?'

'Yeah.' she whispered.

'Okay.'

'I... can I have a hug?' she whimpered.

'Of course you can,' he said instantly, moving to wrap his arms tightly around her. 'What's going on Mer?' he murmured into her hair.

'Derek...' she whimpered, her shoulders beginning to shake as she held onto him tightly.

'Hey, hey hey,' he breathed, pulling back to see her face. 'Mer, please don't cry. Don't cry tell me whats wrong.'

'My mom...'

'Your... what's she done now?' he asked, becoming angry. 'If she's upset you I swear I'm going to-'

'She has Alzheimer's, Derek.' she said tearfully.

'Wait, what?' he asked, the anger falling from his face. 'She...'

'She has Alzheimer's,' Meredith sniffled, wiping at her nose. 'She has Alzheimer's and she's had it for over a year and I didn't know and now I have to fix it.'

'Fix it?' Derek frowned.

'She... apparently she needs to go in a home and I... she's all the way across the country, Derek.'

'I cant believe it.' he whispered.

'I know.'

'Here, come sit.' he pulled her to a bed and onto his lap, his arms snaking around her. 'So... how did the Chief know? How didn't we find out about this sooner? Ellis Grey having Alzheimer's is kind of a big deal in the surgery world.'

'I don't know.' she whispered, shaking her head. 'Richard called him, she told him she'd been in contact with me but obviously she hadn't.'

'She hasn't contacted you since she found out we got married.'

'I know.' she whispered, resting her head in the crook of his neck. 'I... she's been on her own for a year and a half, Derek. Something could have happened to her.'

'How has she even managed to keep it secret?'

'I don't know. I dont understand how she survived this long if she's in need of full time care.'

'At least we know now.' Derek rubbed her back gently. 'So we have to go and see her?'

'Yeah.' she said quietly.

'How... when?'

'I dont know.' she sighed. 'As soon as possible. The Chief said we can both take a week to go. He gave me some time off today to make the arrangements.'

'I... are you okay booking the flights or do you want me to do it?'

'I can book a plane, Derek.'

'I know, I know.' he murmured. 'I just know it's a lot to deal with... I know you don't get on but she is your mom.'

'I know.' she mumbled. 'Sorry I didnt mean to snap.'

'It's okay.' he said, kissing her forehead softly. 'Do we need to book somewhere to stay too?'

'We could probably stay at the house but... I'd rather stay somewhere else.'

'Okay. Do you want to sort it or shall I?'

'I will.' she nodded. 'I... can we just stay here for a bit?'

'Of course. Shall we lay down?'

'Yeah.' she murmured. 'Cuddle.'

'Definitely cuddle.' he nodded, pulling her to him and entwining their legs as he held her close. 'It's going to be okay. We'll sort it.'

'Hmmmm.'

'I love you. And we will sort it.'

'Okay.'

'Don't worry. At least we know now and can do something about it.'

'Homes are expensive, Derek.'

'I... we'll figure it out.' he sighed, squeezing her. 'We'll work something out.'

'How?'

'I don't know. But we will. We'll be okay.'

'Okay.' she murmured, burying her face in his chest, not wanting to move. Derek was here now and he was holding her and he said they would be okay. He said they would figure something out, but she knew things wouldn't be that simple. Things with her mom were never simple and she was dreading going back to Seattle.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	6. Chapter 6

_Hi guys! I am sorry for the delay in updates, I hope everyone had lovely holidays and happy new year! I know this update is quite short but I wrote the next chapter before I wrote this one, and because I haven't updates in a while I thought I would treat you to them both. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. Any feedback is appreciated._

Derek squeezed Meredith's knee as they approached her mom's house. The flight from Seattle had been long, it had been long and tiring flight and Meredith was about to see her mom for the first time in five years, and the first time since she'd gotten sick. He knew how hard this was going to be for her. Any interaction with her mom usually ended in an upset Meredith, let alone seeing her mom who was sick.

Richard said Ellis still had her temper, but was living twenty years ago, when they were together. He had no idea if Ellis was even going to remember Meredith, or him. On one hand, if she didn't remember him, this could be the most pleasant encounter he'd ever had with his mother in law.

'We're here,' Meredith whispered to him as the cab pulled up outside her childhood home.

'You okay?' he murmured, running his hand along her arm to her hand and interlocking their fingers.

'Hmmmm.' She breathed, not meeting his eye.

'Let me pay and then we'll have a minute before we go in.' he promised.

'Okay.' She nodded, before following him out of the cab once he handed the driver their fare. 'Derek,' she murmured, holding out her arms to him.

'Hey,' he cooed, scooping her in his arms and holding her close to his chest. 'Come on,' he breathed. 'It's going to be okay.'

'I don't…' she trailed off.

'Shhhh,' he breathed, wrapping her in his arms. 'I love you. I love you and we're going to handle whatever this throws at us together.'

'Kay…' she sniffled.

'I'm going to be there the whole time, and if you need a minute or a couple of minutes outside just tell me and we can take a time out. Okay?'

'Okay.' She whispered into his neck.

'I love you.'

'I love you.' She breathed. 'I love you so much.'

'I know. And I'm here if you need a time out.'

'Kay.'

'Do you want a word? A timeout word? Something random?'

'Yeah.' She nodded.

'Okay,' he breathed, squeezing her. 'How about pickles?'

'Pickles?' she scrunched her nose, pulling back from him slightly, a giggle lacing her voice but tears still dominating her eyes.

'Pickles.' He laughed, kissing her quickly. 'You want five minutes outside, just tell your mom you're going to get some pickles.'

'You're crazy.' She shook her head, smiling.

'I know.' He shrugged. 'Are you ready to go inside?'

'No.' she sighed. 'But lets go anyway.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yeah.' She nodded, reaching for his hand. 'Lets go.'

'Okay.' He nodded, following her.

They stood on the doorstep as Meredith knocked, Richards tall frame coming toward them.

'Meredith,' he smiled sadly at her.

'Hi.' She said as the older man pulled her into an awkward hug.

'It's good to see you. I just wish it was under better circumstances.'

'Yeah.' She breathed, and he could tell the way she was biting her lip was in order to stop crying.

'And I don't believe we've been introduced?' Richard smiled, extending his hand to Derek. 'Derek, isn't it?'

'It is.' Derek nodded, smiling as he shook Richard's hand.

'Lovely to finally meet you.'

'Likewise.' He nodded.

'I believe you make this young lady very happy.'

'No happier than she makes me.' Derek smirked, squeezing Meredith's hand and placing a kiss on her cheek.

'Richard!' came Ellis' booming voice. 'Richard?!'

'I… I think you should come through.' Richard said tentatively. 'I'm coming!' he shouted back to her mom.

Meredith took a deep breath and Derek put his hand tenderly on Meredith's back as they followed Richard.

'Is that Adele?' Ellis' voice came sharp.

'No,' said Richard, as they entered the living room. 'It's Meredith.' He smiled.

'Hi… mom.' Meredith breathed at the sight of her mom sat in a chair in the corner of the room, a cup of coffee beside her.

'Richard,' Ellis turned to him.

'Yes?' he smiled.

'Where is my coffee?'

'It's right there.' He pointed at her mug. 'Do you guys want to sit… or?'

'We'll take the couch.' Derek nodded, guiding Meredith to the couch and wrapping his arm around her protectively when they sat down.

'Ellis,' Richard began again. 'Meredith and Derek are here to see you.'

'Meredith?' she frowned, turning to look at them both on the couch.

'Yeah.' Meredith smiled. 'It's me, mom.'

'I'm sorry, I must have forgotten the last time I saw you.' Her mom laughed softly. 'when was the last time you were in the city?'

'It's been about five years.' Meredith smiled, but Derek could see the tears still brimming.

'Five… I could have sworn the heart liver transplant was only about three years ago!' she laughed again.

'The what?' Meredith breathed, tilting her head slightly.

'Our first surgery together…' Ellis frowned, her eyes intense, as if it was obvious.

'I…' Meredith glanced at Derek.

'Ellis, this isn't Meredith Thomas.' Richard shook his head. 'She's not from Mass Gen.' He looked at Meredith sadly. 'This is Meredith, your daughter. And her husband, Derek.'

'What?' Ellis laughed.

'It's me mom, Meredith.'

'Richard this isn't funny,' Ellis laughed. 'You can give it up now, dear.' She turned to Meredith.

'I…' Meredith breathed, looking at Richard.

'I'm not joking, Ellis, this is your daughter, Meredith.'

'Don't be so ridiculous.' She snapped. 'I might be tired, Richard but I'm not going crazy for God's sakes.' She rolled her eyes. 'Ignore him.' She turned to Meredith. 'So, I believe your cardiovascular department has almost doubled in the last two years?'

'Oh…' Derek felt Meredith tense up beside him. Ellis was obviously confused. She thought Meredith was Meredith Thomas whoever that was, presumably a cardio surgeon at Mass General hospital.

'All the attention from Amanda winning the Harper Avery must have been incredible for the department.'

'Oh… yeah.' Meredith nodded, smiling weakly. 'It's been great expanding things.'

'I'm Derek Shepherd,' Derek decided to jump in and save his wife. He leaned forward to shake Ellis' hand. 'Meredith's husband.'

'I don't remember you being married, Meredith.' Ellis frowned.

'I…' Meredith glanced at Derek.

'It's new.' He said quickly. 'We married about a year ago.' Meredith squeezed his hand by way of thank you.

'How wonderful.' Ellis gushed. Yeah, this was definitely not his mother in law.

'It was a beautiful ceremony.' Derek smiled, remembering his and Meredith's wedding three years ago.

'Would either of you like a drink?' Asked Richard, standing up.

'Oh…. No….' Meredith shook her head, turning to Derek quickly. 'Pickles.'

'Pickles?' asked Richard.

'I… think we're going to have a moment outside, if that's alright with you?' said Derek, stroking his thumb over the back of Meredith's hand tenderly.

'Of course.' Richard nodded. 'I know it's a lot to take in.'

'We'll be right back Ellis,' smiled Derek. 'we're just going to get a drink.'

'Richard, you get them a drink honey.' She frowned. 'Don't be a bad host.'

'I… I need the bathroom anyway, so we really don't mind grabbing some water from the kitchen.'

'Okay.' Ellis sighed, waving her hand.

'Come on,' Derek breathed, pulling his wife up from the couch. 'Oh Mer…' he breathed, when they reached the kitchen and shut the door.

'Derek…' she breathed, physically shaking.

'I know.' He murmured, hugging her. 'I know baby, I know.'

'I… she….'

'I know,' he comforted her, rocking her gently.

'She… she doesn't know me.'

'She doesn't.' he agreed. 'She's calling Richard honey… she.. God, Derek…' she whimpered.

'I know….'

'She's so advanced….'

'I know.'

'It's one thing hearing about it but this…' she trailed off.

'I don't know what to say.' He murmured, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

'You don't have to say anything,' she sniffled. 'You being here… it's enough.'

'It doesn't feel like enough.' He admitted, running his hands up and down her sides.

'It is. I love you.'

'I love you too.' He whispered, kissing her softly before resting his forehead against his beautiful wife's.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review! X_


	7. Chapter 7

She felt nauseous. She felt so nauseous. She didn't think she'd actually ever felt this nauseous in her life. Her mom was really sick. The last week had been incredibly overwhelming as to how sick her mother actually was.

When they had arrived, Ellis didn't know who Meredith was. She knew who Richard was, she knew him very well. But she had no idea who Meredith was and that was beyond disturbing. This wasn't a slow burning Alzheimer's, it was fast. Ellis had only been sick a year and a half and she already didn't recognise her own daughter. They had fixed her up with a place in a home two days ago, and getting the rights to her mom's money and power of attorney had been extremely difficult.

Draining. It had all been so draining. It was like she was watching her mom disappear before her very eyes. On the one hand, her mom was a lot easier to manage, she thought she was living twenty years ago and was still sleeping with the chief. She couldn't belittle Meredith because she had no idea who she was. Which she always thought would be amazing. But it was actually crap.

Her mom didn't know her. And while her and her mom had never been the best of friends, her mom had stuck around when her dad left, and now she didn't have either of them.

It was almost like a grieving process. For the woman that used to be her mom. And even though she didn't like her, Meredith thought it was probably worse to see how much happier her mom was without a daughter, than for her to have died the way she had always known her.

Richard had told her the previous day that he couldn't continue to see her, not as much anyway. Which was understandable. She was pretty sure she could never forgive Derek for having an affair in the first place, let alone condone him seeing his mistress everyday to comfort her through her illness. It made sense.

But it meant her mom would be alone. Her dad obviously wasn't around. There were no other kids. It was just her and her mom like it had always been. Except Meredith had a whole new life for herself. One with Derek. One based in New York six hours away. Where she worked all the hours God gave and couldn't just pop in to see her mom and check how she was doing.

She couldn't be there for her mom to talk to, even if she didn't have a clue who Meredith was. If there was an emergency or they needed a quick medical decision, Meredith couldn't just dive there. She had to catch a six-hour plane and do almost an hour either side of it. If they rang to say she'd fallen and hit her head, Meredith wouldn't even be in the same time zone to always answer the phone.

It made her feel sick. She didn't want to be this responsible for her mom. She didn't even like her mom. But something inside of her felt this need to be with her. The need to be close to her. She was all Ellis had left.

And Meredith knew she couldn't walk away. Otherwise she'd be just like her father. She needed to be for her mom what her mom had been for her. Someone who stuck around even when they didn't want to, even if they weren't very good at being what the other one needed. She needed to stick around and not let her mom die alone.

But… it just wasn't that simple. She and Derek had just got their new apartment, and their new jobs and they were settled. They were really, really settled. They were settled and this was not what they needed. But her conscience wouldn't let her mom die alone. It was cruel.

'Hey,' breathed Derek, coming out of the bathroom of their hotel room, a towel wrapped around his tanned waist.

'Hey,' she smiled weakly from her spot on the bed. He looked good. He always looked so good. He wasn't muscly. Muscly wasn't a word she would use to describe Derek. But he was toned. She could see his abs but they weren't overly prominent, and his arms were strong but they weren't big. He was perfect. Her dreamy husband was perfect.

'I thought you were meant to be packing.' He frowned, moving to put on some deodorant.

'Oh… yeah…'

'It's okay,' he said softly. 'I'll start it in a minute.'

'I….' she breathed before trailing off as Derek removed the towel from around his waist and put on a pair of boxers. They were meant to be flying back to New York in the morning and having a night to themselves in their pyjamas with room service. And Derek looked good in his plaid pyjamas which he pulled over his hips.

'Did you say you were wearing your brown sweater tomorrow or the green?' he asked, moving to the closet where the two sweaters hung.

'I was going to wear green,'

'Okay.' He nodded, slipping the brown one off the hanger and putting it into the open suitcase on the floor. 'Do you want me to leave all your toiletries out until morning?'

'Yeah,' she said quietly.

'Okay.' He nodded, reaching for his own dirty clothes he had taken off before his shower, folding them and placing them with her sweater. 'I don't know how we have so much stuff for only a week.'

'Yeah.' She repeated.

'Black or white converse tomorrow?'

'Oh… white.'

'White it is.' He nodded, putting her black ones in the case.

'Derek stop.' She said quickly, surprising herself with her firmness.

'What?' he breathed, looking at her with his big concerned eyes. 'Are you okay?' he murmured, moving to sit next to her on the bed. 'I'm sorry,' he wrapped an arm around her. 'I… what's wrong?'

The nausea built in her throat, and she ducked out of Derek's embrace to stand in front of him on the bed, her eyes avoiding his.

'I can't go.' She whispered.

'What?' he murmured, obviously confused.

'I… I can't leave, Derek. I can't leave my mom.'

'Oh baby,' he breathed, standing from the bed to join her. 'Do you want me to call the chief? See if he'll give us a few more days? I know a couple of days isn't very long to see your mom settled.'

'No,' she shook her head, not being able to look her husband in the eye. 'I can't… I can't go back to New York, Derek.'

'What?' he frowned, all the softness from his voice gone.

'I can't… I cant leave my mom on her own like this.'

'I… I don't understand.'

'I can't go back to New York.' She repeated, swallowing hard to stop her voice from breaking.

'Are you serious?' he snapped.

'I know…' she said quickly. 'I know it's the worst timing in the world, we've just got our apartment and our jobs and I know it's the worst time in the world to move but Derek-'

'Move?' he almost shouted, his face losing the softness along with his voice.

'I… Derek…' she almost whimpered.

'You want to move?' he shouted.

'I can't leave her.'

'Are you kidding me?'

'I… no….' she shook her head. 'She's really sick, Derek.'

'And we just put her in a very expensive care home.' He pointed out.

'Oh yeah, just ship her off and leave her there to die alone.' She snapped.

'She has Richard.'

'Richard?' Meredith laughed harshly, tears stinging her eyes. 'You think it's okay for my mom to die with only her ex-lover around her? Who has a wife?'

'You thought it was okay for her to live with only her ex-lover around her.' He shrugged.

'She's dying, Derek.'

'I know that.' He snapped. 'She doesn't even know who you are! And even when she did all she did was neglect you.'

'She stuck around.' Meredith said firmly. 'My dad left and she stuck around.'

'Oh yeah, she stuck around.' Derek rolled his eyes. 'She stuck around to tell you that nothing you ever did was good enough, that you would never go anywhere. She stuck around to break you.'

'I'm not broken.' She shouted.

'You were!'

'She stuck around. You'd do the same for your mom!' she shouted. 'And so would I!'

'Don't you dare.' He breathed, shaking his head. 'Don't you dare ever compare that woman to my mom.'

'She's my mom, Derek.'

'She hasn't spoken to you since we got married. You had to hide the fact I was your boyfriend. She has never spoken to me directly and hardly acknowledges my existence.' He said slowly. 'After everything my mom's done for you, you think it's okay to compare her to Ellis Grey?' he began to shout again.

'I know she's not perfect.'

'Not perfect?' he snarled. 'Never, _ever_ compare her to my mom again.' He was seething. His face was read and his heart was racing. She could tell. But the anger inside her wouldn't die down. This was her mom, she couldn't leave her. And her husband was supposed to support her in that.

'I still cant leave her.'

'You want to move your life to be with a woman who didn't talk to you because you got married?'

'That's not the point!'

'It is the point!' he shouted. 'When you're asking me to leave my whole life for a woman who has never respected me and never respected our relationship!'

'I'm not asking you to leave your whole life, Derek.' She rolled her eyes.

'Oh, so, my family, my home, my job, my friends…. If that's not my whole life then what is?!'

'I'm not asking you to leave them!'

'Yes you are! That's exactly what you're doing!'

'Fine.' She shouted. 'Maybe it is. But your family isn't dying.'

'No, but they're my family.'

'And Ellis is mine!'

'No she's not.' He laughed cynically, shaking his head. 'She hasn't been your family in eight years. Hell, was she even your family before then?'

'She's my mom.'

'Who you don't talk to!'

'She's still my mom, Derek.'

'So you're asking _me_ , to leave my mom, and all my sisters, and my brother, and my nephew, for someone who you share nothing but blood with? You think that's okay?'

'I think you're my husband and you should be supporting me.' She snapped.

'Don't you dare.' He shook his head again. 'Are you seriously trying to say I'm a bad husband?'

'No,' she breathed quickly, shaking her head. 'No…'

'Really? Because it sounds like it.'

'Well you're being selfish.'

' _I'm_ being selfish?' he laughed. 'You're the one asking me to change my life for a woman who hates my guts.'

'She doesn't hate your guts.' Meredith quipped.

'Really? So that's why she won't have anything to do with you since we got together?'

'You know what she's like.'

'Exactly!'

'Derek she could literally live another year and then die. And then we could go back home.'

'Are you really that stupid?' he shouted. 'We have an apartment, Meredith. We have jobs. We have internships at the fourth best surgical residency programme in the country. And you think we could just move out here for a year and then go back and everything will be the same?!'

'I know it wont be easy-'

'Easy?! We'll lose our jobs at Sinai, and have to transfer to somewhere in Seattle. Somewhere way down the list because we're late transfers. So we'll come out with less prestige and we'll be earning less money, which we'll need because we'll have just moved to another fucking state and will need somewhere else to live and will need to furbish them, oh and buy new cars. We'll have no friends, and then in what… a year, two? Your mom will die and then we'll have to sell everything again and move back to New York. Where we'll have to transfer residency programme's _again_ and end up somewhere crap!'

'That's worse case scenario.' She snapped.

'No! That's reality, Meredith. We're going to lake a downgrade in hospital, a downgrade in pay, lose our apartment, lose our cars, and that's just the practical stuff!'

'You're being ridiculous.'

'I'm being realistic. You're being ridiculous.' He shouted, pacing on the opposite side of the bed.

'I'm being ridiculous?! You think it's okay for me to deal with all the paper work and the calls for my dying mother from six hours across the country when anything could happen to her?'

'I think you suggesting we upheave our whole life which we have built with our family for someone who has never accepted me, is anything but okay.'

' _Your_ family.'

'What?' his head snapped up, his eyes flashing.

'We've built a life with your family. Not mine.'

'Are you…' he trailed off, running his hand through his hair and taking a deep breath. 'Fine. They're my family. If you don't consider them your family then by god do I consider your mom mine!'

'Fine!'

'After everything my family has done for you… after everything I've done for you and the for you to say….' He shook his head, his fingers still in his messy curls. 'And what about babies?'

'Wha… what about babies?' she breathed, the tears suddenly returning to her eyes as her voice wavered.

'You want babies, right? You wanted them sooner rather than later? We literally decided a few weeks ago that we were starting saving ready to be pregnant in two and a half years…. And you think… you think we'll be able to afford that? You think I want to have babies while living six hours away from my family? Because that is not happening.'

'Derek….'

'No!' he shouted. 'I'm not having my kids not know their grandma because you feel this obligation to your mom that she does not deserve.'

'I….' she trailed off, her eyes welling. 'Fine.'

'Fine?' he snarled. 'Fine.'

'So no babies.' She shrugged.

'I can't believe you.' He shook his head.

'I have to stay with her, Derek. She's my mom!'

'She is not your mom, goddamn it!'

'Except she is!' Meredith shouted, clenching her fists. 'I wish she wasn't, trust me. I really, really, wish she wasn't. But she is. And she has nobody left.'

'And there's a good reason for that!'

'I know you hate her.' She spat.

'Yeah, yeah I do.'

'So you want me to just lave her to die.'

'I don't think we should move our whole lives for her.'

'Yeah, I'm getting that.' She quipped.

'Why are you acting like this isn't a lot to ask?' he groaned. 'Maybe if things were different between us and your mom, I'd get it. But she hates me. She hates you because you're married to me. We owe her nothing.'

'I owe her a lot actually.'

'Don't start this!' he shouted. 'Do not start defending her.'

'I'm not defending her!' Meredith gasped.

'I swear, the amount of times I've held you when she's upset you… helped you when she's made things difficult for you… how much my mom has tried to give you what she didn't… if you start defending her I'll-'

'What?!' she shouted loudly. 'You'll what, Derek?!' she demanded.

'I don't know.' He said sharply.

'You don't know.' She glared at him.

'I cant do this for her. Sorry.' He said bluntly, staring at her.

'What about me?' she asked, trying not to let her voice waver but sounding slightly smaller than before.

'What about you?'

'Can't you do this for me?'

'I….' he sighed, looking away from her for a second. 'I don't know.' He said honestly. She knew his honest face well.

She paused for a moment, swallowing the lump that formed in her throat. 'Okay.' She breathed.

'I'm going to bed.' He said. 'Do you mind if I turn out the light?'

'It's still early.' She pointed out as he walked over to the light switch.

'I'm going to bed.' He repeated coldly.

'Okay.' She breathed. They hadn't eaten yet. They were supposed to order up and cuddle in bed, and now Derek was laying with his back to her, the room dark and her stuff was in their suitcase. The flight they booked was early in the morning, and Derek was calling it a night. He wouldn't talk about it anymore. She knew when Derek wouldn't talk about something anymore. And this was a classic example.

Their flight was in the morning and if Derek wasn't going to talk about it anymore, she assumed he was going back to New York. If Derek was going back to New York without talking to her about it, he wasn't going to help her figure something out. She didn't want him to leave without her. But she also didn't want to leave her mom. She just wished they could have talked about things properly instead of fighting so much and have Derek be so mad at her. Because he was mad.

She should have spoken to him about it before, she shouldn't have left it so last minute. She should have known he would react like this. She should have given him time to cool off so that they could have managed a proper conversation before their flight was due to leave.

She reached for her purse on the table and got her wallet before leaving the room and wiping her eyes, walking down the hall to a vending machine. Fighting with Derek was probably her least favourite thing in the world. He was her rock. He was her everything, and fighting with him was the worst. All she wanted when she was upset was him to hold her tightly in his arms and kiss her softly while telling her he loved her.

She sighed and bought three bags of chips from the machine, along with a can of soda. Room service was a no go now, waiting for it to arrive and then eating it in the dark was impractical while Derek was laying in the dark.

His breathing was heavy as she walked back into the room and kicked off her shoes before scrambling in the bed next to him and crossing her legs while she ate her chips. He wasn't asleep. When he was asleep he rolled from his side to his back, something she wasn't even sure he was aware of. They always began the night by spooning but he naturally went on his back after he'd dozed off, and she ended up resting her head on his chest , her arm around his waist while his snaked around her back. So he wasn't asleep. He was still awake.

After finishing her chips she threw the packets onto the bed side table before taking a big drink of her soda. Then she wriggled down under the covers, which felt a lot colder than it should do. She always thought sleeping without Derek was the worst, but sleeping in the same bed as him when he was being distant was even worse. He was so close yet so far.

She took a shaky breath as tears formed in her eyes. Her husband was lay ignoring her. He was getting on a plane in the morning and she had no idea what she was going to do. If she got on the plane, coming back for her mom would be more complicated, and she'd have to book another flight soon.

But if she didn't get on the plane…. If she didn't go home with her husband…. She didn't know what was going to happen. She hadn't considered living in Seattle without Derek. She hadn't considered living anywhere without Derek since she had been nineteen. If… if she was going to live here without him she didn't know what that would mean. Because she couldn't lose him. If there was one thing she knew, it was that she couldn't lose Derek.

'Derek?' she whispered to the back of his head from across the bed. She was met with silence. 'I love you.' She said quietly.

She was met with silence once again and the lump in her throat seemed to double in size. She turned over to face the opposite way, wiping at her eyes quickly, burying her face in her pillow in an attempt to cover her sniffles.

'I love you too.' He sighed.

Her shoulders seemed to relax with relief at his words, but her eyes were still wet. She contemplated turning back over and wrapping her arms around him, but she didn't think she could take it if he were to reject her.

Why did her mom always seem to cause the biggest problems between them? She knew she couldn't help being ill, but the only time her and Derek really, really fought was always about her mother.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review! X_


	8. Chapter 8

_Hi guys! I'm sorry this has taken so long and I know I always say it but college is kicking my ass. I've been so busy with papers and I'm going to be for the next couple of months. But hopefully I can still find time to update for you guys as often as I can._

 _Thank you so much for reading and thank you for all your reviews!_

She heard the shrill of Derek's alarm go off, followed by him stirring in the bed next to her. She'd hardly slept all night, just been lay awake thinking. She had no idea what she was going to do, and there wasn't a lot of time to talk about it.

The weight of the bed shifted as Derek got up and headed straight into the bathroom. She had to wipe her eyes which had become wet again, this wasn't a fight that was going to go away. It wasn't something they could just ignore, they had a flight booked and she either had to get on it or not.

The light suddenly came on, hurting her eyes causing her to squint. She rolled over slowly to see Derek rummaging through their case, pulling out some fresh boxers and socks.

'Hey,' she breathed, knowing if she didn't say anything to him, he wouldn't say anything to her.

'Hey,' he said, without looking up.

It was awkward. They were never awkward. They were happy and they were playful and they were in love. They weren't awkward.

'I… how long have we got?'

'Here?' he asked, sitting on the edge of the bed to put his socks on. 'About an hour.'

'Okay,' she nodded, sitting up. 'I… we need to talk, Derek.'

'No, we don't.'

'Yes, we do.' She sighed. 'I meant what I said last night, Derek.'

'Don't.' he snapped.

'Derek… we have to talk about this.'

'No we don't because it's not happening.'

'That's not fair.' She protested.

'And neither is moving our life for your mom.'

'Derek please.' She begged. 'Just turn around… talk to me.'

'I don't want to talk about it. There's nothing to talk about.'

'Yes there is.'

'No, there's not.' He said adamantly.

'I don't know what to do.' She admitted quietly. 'And you're not helping.'

'Oh, I am sorry.' He said sarcastically.

'I… you could at least help me look at the pros and cons calmly and logically.' She said, a hopeful tone in her voice. 'That's what you always do.'

'Hmmmm.' He breathed, reaching for a navy blue sweater and pulling it over his head.

'I know you're mad at me.'

'Yeah I am.'

'I'm sorry for making you mad and I know it's not ideal and it's come out of nowhere but I… I really need us to talk about it.'

'What is there to talk about?' he sighed.

'I can't leave her.'

'Meredith!' he sighed, exasperated, turning around. 'There's no point discussing it, its not happening.'

'Derek,' she sighed. 'Please can we talk about it?'

'No.'

'Derek….'

'Damn it I said no!' he shouted, turning away from her and running his hand through his hair. Silence covered the room as she felt the lump in her throat return and her bottom lip beginning to wobble.

'Okay,' she whispered, swallowing quickly to hide the break in her voice.

'I'm going to brush my teeth.' He said flatly.

All she wanted was to go up and hug him. Hug him and wrap her arms around him because she wanted to talk to him. She wanted to talk to him and she wanted to hold him and she didn't want him to be mad at her. She was trying to do the right thing and she just needed him to at least listen to her.

'Derek,' she said quietly, coming up behind him in the bathroom.

'Yeah?' he sighed, not looking up to meet her eye in the mirror.

'I… we really need to talk about it.'

He didn't respond, spitting into the sink.

'I might have to stay.'

Silence again.

'Please can we talk? I don't want you to leave without us talking about it.' She chewed her lip nervously.

'What?' he spun around. 'Me leave?'

'Y..yeah…' she stammered.

'You… you're not coming home?'

'I… I told you we needed to talk about it….'

'So you're not coming home?' he looked at her, his tone angry but the look in his eyes hurt. She could see the tears welling and the betrayal in his expression.

'I don't know….' She whispered.

'Oh.'

'I… yeah…' she said awkwardly, her own eyes singing with tears.

'The plane leaves in two hours.' He said calmly.

'I know.'

'So you might not be getting on?'

'I don't know.' She whispered.

'Okay.' He replied, walking past her and back into the bedroom where he began to take her stuff out of the suitcase.

'So… can we talk?' she asked tentatively as she came back in the room. 'Wait what are you doing?'

'Well if you're staying.' He shrugged.

'Derek I didn't say I was staying.'

'Yes you did.'

'No, I asked if we could talk about it because I don't know what I'm going to do yet.'

'I just cant believe you're serious about this!'

'I cant believe you think I wouldn't be.' She frowned. 'I'm trying to do the right thing here, Derek.'

'Hmmmm.'

'Derek please.'

'I'm not talking about it now. If you want to talk about it at home and realise how stupid you're being, then that's fine.'

'I'm not being stupid.' She snapped.

'Except you are.'

'If you actually had a conversation with me about it you would understand that I'm not being stupid.'

'I can assure you, I wont.'

'You're such an ass.'

'Obviously.' He rolled his eyes.

'What was that for?' she demanded, putting her hands on her hips as he continued to repack the case.

'I'd have to be an ass for you to choose your mom over me.' He shrugged.

'Fuck you.'

'Fuck me?' he shouted, turning around.

'Yeah, fuck you. I am not choosing my mom over you you're putting words into my mouth without even listening to what I have to say!'

'I'm not listening to this.' He shook his head. 'I'm going home, whether you are or not.'

'So you're going back across the country?'

'Yes, I am!' he shouted. 'Because that was always the plan and I'm not the one wanting to change it twelve hours before we're supposed to leave! You cant just expect me to stay this short notice.'

'I didn't ask you to stay I asked you to talk about it!'

'Because you want me to stay!'

'I do!'

'No.'

'You're being unreasonable.'

' _You're_ being unreasonable. Wanting me to leave my whole life with no waning and threatening me if I don't.'

'I am not threatening you!'

'Telling me I'm going to lose my wife?'

'I did not say that.'

'So you think it's going to work living six hours across the country from each other?'

'I didn't say that's what's going to happen.' She snapped.

'Well if you're staying here….'

'Derek I just want to talk.'

'We can do that at home.'

'I… Derek…'

'Are you coming home or not?'

'I…' she breathed, looking at her husband who's eyes were dark. Not a good dark. Not a horny dark, an upset dark brimmed with tears. 'Yeah.' She sighed. 'I'm coming home.' She nodded quickly. 'But I really need us to talk about it.'

'I…' he sighed, meeting her eye. 'Fine.'

'Thank you.' She whispered, her voice almost breaking. 'I'm sorry for going about all of this wrong.'

'Hmmmm.' He breathed.

'Can I… can I have a hug?' she asked quietly, hopefully.

'Hmmmm,' he murmured, opening his arms to her.

'Oh…' she breathed as he held her close, and she wrapped her arms tightly around his waist. 'I'm sorry.' She mumbled into his neck.

'Me too.'

'I don't know what to do, Derek…'

'I know.' He sighed.

'I don't-'

'Don't,' he said. 'We have to sit on a plane together for six hours. Don't talk about it now and make me mad.'

'Okay….'

'We're on pause.'

'Pause.' She echoed, her face still buried in his neck.

'We'll talk about it when we get home.'

'Okay.' She nodded.

'You should probably get ready.' He breathed, pulling away from her. 'I'll repack your stuff.'

'Thank you.' She said quietly, reaching for his hands. 'Kiss?'

'Kiss.' He smiled slightly, ducking his head down to hers as she squeezed his hands.

'Love you.' She breathed against his lips.

'Love you too.' He sighed, and she could tell although they were on 'pause', things weren't exactly normal.

'I'll go get ready.'

'Okay.' He sighed, turning back to the case and putting her stuff back in.

She'd fought for a conversation and he had finally granted her one, but she couldn't exactly say she was looking forward to it. It was bound to lead to another fight and fighting with Derek was the worst thing in the world. But she had at least eight hours with her husband, the love of her life, before any more fighting about her mom. They were on a pause and she needed to take advantage of it before they landed back at JFK and things got ugly again.

 _Thank you for reading, please review X_


	9. Chapter 9

_Hi guys! I'm so sorry for not updating in forever, but I promise I have not forgotten about this story and I am still working on it. I thought I'd treat you guys by way of apology for taking so long to update. So I hope you enjoy and I promise to try and not be so long posting the next chapter! Thank you for reading and please do review!_

Lavender filled Derek's senses as he kissed the top of his sleeping wife's head. Their fight was on pause, which meant she was snuggled into him the whole flight home as she slept. She hadn't slept well the night before, he knew she hadn't slept well the night before. This morning he couldn't bring himself to care, but as she'd continually rubbed her eyes while they'd sat in the gate, and he saw how dark the circles under her eyes were he couldn't not hold her as she slept.

He knew she didn't sleep well without him, even when they hadn't been fighting. She was practically lay on him, sat on his lap with her head resting on his chest, her arms wrapped around him. She was so dainty, she was short. He was short, but she was shorter, and she was tiny. And delicate. She was beautiful.

He had to shut his brain off, resist listening to it at all. Because if he did, he'd forget all about jow beautiful his wife was and just about how she wanted him to up his whole life and move across the country for her mother. Although she'd come home with him, he knew their conversation wasn't over. Meredith was adamant about this and as much as he normally admired his wife's determination, when it came to their own fights it was a pain in the ass.

Part of him felt bad. Her mother was sick. She was really, really sick. And Meredith only wanted to help. But he just couldn't do it. Ellis was a bitch. She was a bitch to him and she was a bitch to Meredith. He'd have been happy to support Meredith in helping her, but not at the detriment of losing his job and living across the country from his own family.

He had four sisters and one brother and a mom who had raised them all amazingly despite losing their dad. His sister had a baby and he was pretty sure she would be having another one soon, not being able to watch his nephew grow up wasn't something he was willing to sacrifice for Ellis Grey. Especially when she didn't know who they were, and even if she did, wouldn't care.

He sighed. This wasn't something to think about now. They were going to talk about it when they got home. Now, he just had to enjoy the feeling of his wife in his arms as she slept peacefully.

'Would you like a drink, sir?' she air hostess broke his thoughts as she smiled.

'Oh, no, I'm good. Thank you.' He nodded, before the flight attendant turned her attention to the man next to him, sat by the window.

'Would you like any drinks or snacks, sir?'

'I'll have a coffee, thank you.' The man nodded, in an accent Derek recognised.

'Of course, sir.' She smiled, preparing his drink.

Derek cast his eyes on the man's leg, he was wearing a grey suit and black dress shoes. He was dressed for business; he looked like some hot shot New Yorker, except his accent was British.

'Thanks.' The man smiled as he took the paper cup from the blonde flight attendant, and Derek discretely stole a look at his face, recognising his face. He had absolutely no idea who this man was but he knew he knew him from somewhere. He didn't even know any British people.

'I apologise if I'm wrong,' the man suddenly started, turning to Derek, causing his head to snap up.

'Hi,' Derek smiled.

'Hi,' he nodded. 'Forgive me if I'm wrong, but it's Derek… right?'

'I… yeah…' he breathed.

'I'm Michael Summers, we met on a flight a few years ago,' he smiled. 'Your girlfriend… Meredith, right?'

'Meredith… yeah,' Derek grinned. 'I… She's my wife.'

'Wow,' Michael grinned. 'Last time I saw the two of you, you were on your way to London.'

'London…' Derek echoed. 'Michael… Mike… you're Mike from Manchester?' Derek laughed.

'Yeah.' Mike laughed softly.

'Oh my god, hi.' Derek grinned.

'Hi.'

'Wow… what.. what are the chances?'

'I know.' Mike laughed. 'So you guys are married now?'

'Yeah.' Derek nodded. 'Three years.'

'Wow.'

'I know,' Derek nodded.

'It must have been about what…. Five years since I met you guys?'

'Yeah,' Derek nodded. 'About five years is right.'

'How did you guys get on? Enjoy it?'

'Loved it. We want to go back some day.'

'You should.'

'What about you, what brings you to Seattle, and New York?'

'Oh, New York's just my lay over back to Manchester. I had a meeting in Seattle with a new television network, they want to buy one of our programmes.'

'Oh, I remember you work in TV.' Derek nodded.

'Yeah, I got a promotion. Which is a lot more money but it's a lot more travelling.'

'That must be rough.' Derek nodded.

'Yeah.' He sighed. 'So where are you guys off to? You're at medical school, right?'

'No,' he smiled. 'We graduated last year, we're surgeons now. Well, surgical interns at Mount Sinai in New York, so we're going home. We were visiting Meredith's mother, she's sick.'

'Oh well congratulations.' Mike grinned. 'Is Meredith's mother alright?'

'Not really.' He sighed. 'she has Alzheimer's. Early onset, it's rough.'

'I'm sorry to hear that.'

'I know.' Derek sighed, tightening his arms around his wife. 'I know.'

'Is Meredith alright?'

'I… it's a bit of a mess.' Derek confessed.

'How?' Mike frowned. 'Does she have a lot of family to support her?'

'None.' Derek shook his head. 'None. And Seattle is far from New York, it's stressful.'

'I can imagine.' Mike nodded.

'She wants to move there.' Derek said quietly.

'what?' frowned Mike.

'Meredith, she wants us to move to Seattle to be with her mom.'

'And I'm guessing… you don't want to?' Mike raised his eyebrows.

'No.' he sighed frankly. 'No, I don't. We aren't close to her mom. She doesn't like me, and she doesn't care about Meredith.'

'Moving across the country is a big commitment.'

'Yeah.' Derek sighed. 'Don't get me wrong, I want to help and I want to be there for her but… my family… we're really close. And my sister…she's had a baby,' he smiled. 'Jack. He's adorable. And me and Mer have just started new jobs, we're happy in our apartment and we're talking about starting a family…' he trailed off. 'And I don't know if I can give that up for her mom.'

'Sounds fair enough,' Mike said understandably.

'Hmmmm.' Derek nodded. 'But Meredith's insistent. I really think if I don't agree she'll go without me.'

'You think she'll leave you?' Mike asked quietly, as Derek saw his eyes flit to Meredith asleep on his chest.

'No, no,' he shook his head. 'I think she'll move there and I'll stay here and we'll stay together just live apart until her mom dies.'

'Long distance?'

'Hmmmm.' Derek nodded. 'Meredith's stubborn. She wants to go.'

'Are you happy doing long distance? I mean, I'm away from my wife approximately a week a month, that's three months a year. That can be… hard sometimes. I… it'll be hard.'

'I know.' Derek nodded.

'You're going to go with her, aren't you?' Mike asked knowingly.

'I don't know.' Derek sighed. 'I don't want to.'

'It might sound like a silly question, but if Meredith doesn't have any family, why cant she come here rather than Meredith go there?'

'What?' Derek breathed.

'There are homes in New York, right?'

'Yeah….. yeah there are.'

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

'You're very happy.' Meredith giggled as Derek pulled away from her, his arms still wrapped around her.

'I just love you,' he breathed, kissing her again.

'Derek,' she giggled as he picked her up and carried her through to the bedroom. 'Derek!'

'Hmmm,' he grinned as he laid her down on the bed before moving over her, his kisses moving to her neck.

'Derek,' she breathed, running her fingers through his hair. 'Derek…'

'what?' he asked, moving his hands to her hair and pressing another kiss to her lips.

'Derek stop,' she said softly.

'Stop?' he frowned.

'As much as I'm not loving… this…' she murmured, feeling his erection against her stomach. 'We… are you sure you want to… right before we talk…?'

'Ah,' he grinned, grinding his hips into her. 'We don't need to talk.'

'Derek.' She frowned, freezing.

'Meredith,' he countered, brushing her lips softly with his.

'No, Derek,' she shook her head. 'We need to talk. I know I came home and I love you and I want to talk about this but just because I came home doesn't mean I've given in. We need to talk Derek.'

'You see that's where you're wrong,' he breathed, pushing her back down as she began to sit up. 'we don't.'

'We do.' She protested.

'No,' he kissed her. 'We don't.' he kissed her again.

'Derek-'

'I have a solution.'

'What?' she breathed.

'I have a solution.' He repeated. 'Well, technically Mike had a solution.'

'Wait you told Mike about this?' she drowned.

'I…. yeah but just listen to me.' He pleaded, his eyes searching hers.

'Fine.' She sighed.

'New York.' He said simply.

'What?'

'There are plenty of homes in New York.'

'New York,' she suddenly smiled, catching on.

'The only people left around your mom are you and Richard. Instead of us moving all the way there when we have people here, we can find your mom a home in New York.'

'New York.' Meredith grinned. 'Why didn't we think of that?'

'I don't know.' He laughed.

'I can be near my mom and we can stay here.'

'Exactly.'

'I…. we can stay here.' She beamed, wrapping her arms around his neck.

'We… can… stay… here….' He murmured between kisses.

'I can call around tomorrow,' she grinned. 'Get something sorted. The chief should give me an hour or so to do it.'

'Hmmmm,' he breathed, tucking her hair behind her ear.

'I cant…. How did we not think of this?' she asked again.

'I don't know.' He laughed. 'I guess we have Mike to thank.'

'Mike.' She grinned.

'So… if we don't need to talk anymore, we have more time for this.' He grinned, ducking his head back to hers and parting her lips with his tongue.

'I love you.'

'I love you too.' He murmured as she reached for the bottom of his sweater, pushing it off him.

'I want you,' she said, gripping his face in her hands and kissed him deeply.

'Yes.' He groaned into her mouth.

'Off..' She ordered as she unbuttoned his jeans and pushed them down over his hips.

'Okay' he laughed, breathlessly, pulling back from her to help her own shirt over her head.

'I want you,' she giggled.

'I can tell,' he laughed.

'I don't know why you're laughing, I can feel you want me too.' She smirked, pushing her hips up to his growing erection.

'I do.' he breathed.

'Yes,' she breathed, watching as his hands fell to her jeans.

'Yes?'

'Are you going to torture me?'

'Is that what you want?' he whispered as he unhooked her bra, breathing heavily as she pushed her breasts were in his face.

'Yes…. God yes…'

'You're so beautiful.'

'Derek…' she blushed, running her hands through his hair, her fingernails scratching his scalp slightly.

'You are.'

'Baby…' She whispered, reaching for his hand.

'Hmmm?'

'I just…' she trailed off.

'Yeah?'

'Love you,' she murmured. 'And I want you.'

'Tell me how,' he breathed, running his hands over her breast, his fingers playing along her nipple.

'Taste…'

'Hmmmm' he breathed against her chest, his breath tickling her nipple and sending pleasure straight to her clit.

She nodded, pushing on his head. 'Please…'

'Want…my tongue?'

'God yes…yes…' Meredith pleaded as his lips pressed against her abdomen. 'Inside me,' she breathed. 'Please, Derek…'

'Okay.' he whispered, running a finger over her wet folds.

'I want you,' she gasped softly, moving onto her elbows to watch him as he was about to go down on her.

'You said that,' he grinned, his eyes meeting hers as he moved his mouth lower, as his fingers moved over her.

'Yes..' She moaned, fighting to keep her eyes on him as her body shook as his thumb pressed against her clit.

'I love being between your legs,' he whispered against her.

'Oh god…'

'Watch me.'

'Watch?' She echoed, her eyes glazing over as she looked down at him between her legs.

'Yeah.' he nodded, moving her legs so that they were thrown over his shoulders. She suddenly had a perfect view of his dark head between her legs and her breath hitched in her throat as she watched him dip a finger inside her.

'Keep watching,' he laughed gently, his tongue darting out and pressing against her clit.

'Oh! God….' She moaned, arching up slightly to watch him more. She had never watched a guy go down on her before she'd been with Derek. She'd slept with so many guys before him and if she were to line them all up and pick the best one in bed, from looks alone she'd never have picked Derek, but her husband was the best by far. He knew exactly how to turn her on and always managed to make things a hundred times sexier, and now she could hardly breathe as her heavy breasts ached. 'Derek…fuck…'

'Meredith…' he groaned, running his tongue along her as he continued to move his finger slowly in and out of her.

'Oh my god…oh…' She gasped, gripping his hair with one hand as her other hand moved to cup her right breast.

'That's it…' he breathed, his mouth moving over her.

Her hips rose instinctively to fuck his mouth, desperate to have him, to feel his tongue against her clit. It was unbearably hot to watch and she could barely breathe as she pulled at her own nipple, gasping at the sensation. She wanted to watch him. She wanted to watch as his mouth closed on her clit and sucked. 'Oh my god!'

He sucked hard at her and then flicked his tongue against her as she desperately gasped for breath. He always licked her like he was starving and it made her wetter and wetter as he lapped at her.

'Come,' he whispered, before pressing his mouth to her again.

'Derek…' She cried.

'Mer… Come… Come for me, Mer…'

'I..oh Derek…oh…' She gasped as he sucked harder at her, his hands softly running up and down her thighs as he devoured her. She pinched her own nipple and her hips rocked into him, she had asked him to torture her and he was doing just that.

'Derek…I'm going to…Derek!' She pinched her nipple again as her thighs convulsed around him.

'Hmmm…' he breathed, sucking at her clit.

She thrashed above him, throwing her head back. He was still watching her, her eyes dark and unfocused and she simultaneously pulled at his hair and pushed his lips to her wet centre as she cried out. The orgasm rocked through her body and she couldn't stop screaming his name. The pleasure spread through her whole body as a particularly strong orgasm hit her. Derek's mouth on her was one of her favourite things in life. Actually it was her second favourite, behind her dick inside her, and before his dick inside her mouth.

'Can't… breathe...' She gasped.

'Mer…' he breathed, his hand moving behind her back, holding her in place as his tongue found her clit again.

'Oh god…oh god…' She gasped, watching as his tongue moved slowly, deliberately over her swollen clit. 'Again….'

He continued to suck and lick at her until her body trashed and she was whimpering as his tongue moved over her. And the suddenly the orgasm crashed into her and she heard herself screaming.

'Derek…Derek!'

'God baby, you…you…' he gasped, pressing kisses to her trembling thighs.

'I…oh…' She whimpered, letting her unfocused eyes fall shut as her head fell back.

'You taste so good…'

'Fuck…' She panted.

'Hmmm…' he breathed, running his hands along her legs that were loosely still over his shoulders. 'another one?' he asked.

'What?' she continued to pant.

'Do you want me to eat you again?'

'I…you…I don't…Derek,' she whimpered.

'God, I want you.'

'Y-yes.. yes Derek… Yes please… yes…. Inside me please…'

'Fuck…' he breathed, gently lowering her legs from around his shoulders and kneeling over her, running a hand along his rock-hard length.

'Oh…' she breathed as she watched him. He was so hot as his hand moved over the head, wiping some precum, which only made him harder. 'Oh fuck, Derek.'

'Watching you come in my face like that…' he whispered, his voice rough as his hand pumped.

'Derek…' she swallowed. She wanted Derek to be inside her right now, and she wanted to taste him.

'Taste,' he whispered, almost reading her mind as he ran his finger over the tip and offering it to her.

'Yes,' She nodded eagerly as she took his finger into her mouth, swirling her tongue around it as his taste filled her mouth. It turned him on, sucking his finger. They both knew it was one of his favourite things. It seemed to be a universal guy thing, but it was Derek's favourite so she made sure she gave his finger the same attention she would give his dick. He loved her sucking at him and she knew how watching her suck on his finger made him imagine him fucking her mouth.

'Fuck, that's so hot.'

'You…you taste…amazing…' she whispered honestly.

'Hmmmm…' he breathed, taking his hand back to gather more precum before sticking his hand in her mouth again.

'Oh,' she breathed, gripping his wrist as she lapped at his finger, her eyes meeting his.

'Meredith…'

'Yeah?'

'Fuck baby, I need you.'

'I need you, too,' she breathed. They hadn't slept together in Seattle, she'd been too stressed and exhausted, and she was desperate for her husband. She needed his big dick to fill her up.

'I need to be inside you.'

'God baby, please.' She moaned. 'Oh god…' she gasped as he filled her. 'Fuck me… don't be gentle… fuck me Derek…'

'God…'

'Fuck, Derek,' she gasped at how he deeply he filled her. 'Oh fuck.'

'Fuck Meredith!'

'Fuck me…fuck me…' she chanted.

'You're so tight like this…' he gasped. 'Mer baby you're so tight… so tight! So fucking tight!' he roared, pulling out of her and pushing hard back in, before repeating the motion.

'Fuck!' she screamed as he spread her legs wider for him as he stretched her. 'Oh god…oh god…'

'You…you going to come for me again?' he demanded, slamming into her, the sensation of her tight pussy around him driving him insane already.

'Y-yes…yes…oh god…' Meredith's hands fisted the sheets as he slammed harder into her, spreading her legs even wider. She cried out with each thrust as her sensitive walls clenched around him. 'Oh Derek…oh god…Baby… baby…'

'Fuck you're tight…So tight!'

'Hard…harder…' she begged.

'I'll give you harder…' he grunted, his hands moving to her hips to hold her up as he shifted and slammed even harder into her.

'Oh…oh…' Meredith gasped as she felt the orgasm build. Her legs were wide and her centre was dripping wet meaning Derek could move so quickly and roughly into her. She could barely breathe and she threw her head back as she rode out an even more powerful orgasm than the others, an orgasm that held Derek in place as his hips jerked.

'Oh…oh…fuck, Mer…fuck…'

'Derek…Derek…'

'Tight…. Wet…' he gasped.

Meredith gripped her sheets as Derek thrust into her again, the force of it, lifting her off the bed. His thrusts were wild and harsh and she needed more, wanted more. She seemed spread her legs even wider, ignoring the pain and screamed as Derek began to push into her at a frantic pace. Her head was spinning, she could barely breathe, but she reached between them to gently cup his balls.

'Tight and wet for you baby…' she purred. 'All for you Derek…. Derek!' she screamed as he thrusted so hard into her that she arched her back off the bed.

'Oh…oh…' he growled, his head going back.

'Derek…Derek…' She chanted, squeezing him. 'Harder…oh fuck baby fuck me harder…' She ordered as she felt his balls grow right and heavy in her hand, ready for release. 'Hard…I'm so…close… let me come again baby please…' she pleaded, her voice bordering on a sob.

'A…again…' he breathed, thrusting hard into her, another tremble shaking his body and she looked up to find his eyes dark and entirely out of focus as his hips rocked hard.

'Yes…yes…' she encouraged him as she looked down to see him moving quickly in and out of her. It was so hot, so fucking hot. Watching him eat her and watching him fuck her was always so fucking hot. 'Derek!'

'Mer! Mer!' he screamed, slamming even faster and harder into her, he was grasping at her, his body entirely out of control, his head thrown back as his own powerful orgasm took him over. She felt him release into her and her heart pounded at what felt like a thousand miles an hour.

'Derek….' She whispered as he collapsed on top of her, his sweaty body flopping on hers.

'I love…' he gasped as she immediately ran her fingers through his hair, holding him close to her as they both came down. 'I love you…'

'I love you too.' She breathed, placing a kiss on the top of his head. It was the roughest sex they'd ever had. Or at least that she could remember. It always came after their arguments and she suddenly remembered the wonders of make up sex.

She breathed contently as she held her naked husband in her arms on their bed. He'd just made her come… she wasn't sure how many times because she hadn't been counting, but at least three times she was guessing. He'd just made her come at least three times, and their fight was over. A fight that she thought would go on for days, and get a lot worse. It was all fixed because they had a solution. They had a solution and so she would fix it in the morning and she and Derek could stay in New York with their amazing jobs and amazing apartment and keep having amazing sex.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	10. Chapter 10

_Hi guys! Thank you so much for the reviews on the last chapter, I'm so glad you're enjoying the story. This MerDer are so fun to write because we've seen them go from college freshmen to a happily married couple. The last chapter may have been a little deceiving... so please don't hate me... we all love a bit of drama!_

Meredith smiled as she kissed her husband goodbye, before heading to the chief's office when the rest of the interns began their pre-rounds. The last couple of days had been like a roller coaster. First Derek was her rock, comforting her as she watched her mother disappear before her very eyes, then they had a huge fight, and then he fucked her so hard she was actually sore the next morning.

She really didn't know if she could ever thank Mike from Manchester enough for his solution to their problem, putting her mom in a home in New York hadn't even crossed her mind, or Derek's. And now she could be close to her mom in case anything happened, but she could also carry on building her amazing life with her amazing husband. She knew Derek didn't want to go. And as much as she had wanted him to, she knew he would resent her for it and things would get ugly at some point. But now all her problems seemed to have faded.

So now she was on the way to see the chief to thank him for their time off, and explain the situation to him. She really needed to ring around and try and sort a place in New York for her mom as soon as possible, and she was sure he would give her a couple of hours to hopefully get things sorted.

'Dr. Harvey?' she asked after knocking on his door.

'Oh, Dr. Shepherd,' he smiled. 'Please do come in.'

'Hi,' she nodded, moving to stand in front of his desk.

'Please do sit,' he continued. 'How was Seattle?'

'Good, Thank you.' She nodded.

'And your mother?' he asked.

'Not… so good,' she sighed. 'She's really advanced. More advanced than I was prepared for.'

'Oh no, Meredith. I'm so sorry.'

'She didn't know who I was.' She shook her head. 'She's….. just gone.'

'I can't imagine how difficult that must be.'

'Hmmmm.'

'Was a week enough time?' he asked, shuffling some papers around on his desk.

'Yeah,' she nodded. 'Thank you so much for the time off, and Derek too… we're really grateful.'

'Of course.'

'We… I know it's a lot to ask… but… after we put my mom in a home in Seattle… on the plane home we decided on a change of plan… we want to transfer her out to New York so she's close. I don't have a lot of family but Derek does and it makes sense to have her here with us so that we don't have to keep going to and from.'

'I understand.' Dr. Harvey nodded carefully.

'But the thing is, having only just decided I really need to make a few calls and try and fly back for my mom to bring her here and-'

'You can have a couple of hours today,' Harvey nodded. 'And let me know when you need to collect her.'

'Thank you,' she gasped. 'Thank you… I know we're interns and we haven't been here long and we shouldn't even be taking any time off.'

'I also know that your mother, one of the most well respected surgeons in the world is dying and I understand how hard it must be having her all away across the country.'

'Thank you, sir.' She nodded.

'Is the other Dr. Shepherd on his pre-rounds?'

'He is.' She nodded.

'Okay.' He nodded. 'Go and find Dr. Sloan and tell him I've given you two hours before you start on your attending's service.'

'Thank you,' she breathed. 'Dr. Harvey I really appreciate it.'

'You're welcome, Meredith.'

She made her way down the hall to see Mark looking at the surgical board.

'Dr. Sloan.'

'Grey,' he grinned. 'You're back.'

'I am.' She nodded. 'Have you seen Derek?'

'Yeah, he's on Dr. Reed's service. Do you need me to page him or something?'

'Oh, no.' she shook her head. 'I just wondered if he'd spoken to you.'

'Not about anything important.' Mark frowned.

'Okay,' she nodded. She and Derek were good now, if he was still pissed at her he'd definitely have bitched to Mark at this point. 'Dr. Harvey told me to tell you that I wont be on my attending's service for a couple of hours.'

'Oh,' he frowned. 'Is everything okay?'

'Yeah,' she nodded quickly. 'It's just about my mom. We've put her in a home in Seattle but we're trying to get her into one in New York.'

'Derek said it was rough,' Mark murmured.

'It was.' She sighed.

'I hope things look up for you two.'

'Thanks.' Meredith smiled. 'Are you okay to clear it with my attending if I go and make some calls?'

'Of course.' He nodded. 'You go, I'll page you where you need to be later.'

'Okay, thanks.' She smiled before continuing down the corridor and sitting in an empty office room, pulling up a chair at the computer.

Looking for a home couldn't be that hard, right? All she needed to do was browse for one, call them all up and get quotes, compare them to what she and Derek were already paying for the home in Seattle, and pick the best one to go visit and if they were happy with it, bingo. Done.

She logged onto her personal email and pulled up the documents from Seattle. It was expensive. Probably not the most expensive for Alzheimer's homes, but it was expensive, none the less. She began searching, googling the ones closest to their apartment and the hospital.

There were a few that weren't too far that seemed a similar price to the one her mom was already in and so she grabbed a pen and wrote the numbers down on a piece of paper, keeping all the tabs open so that she could refer back to them.

She was determined to find somewhere today so that she and Derek could go and look around in between their shifts and get her mom out here as soon as possible so things could die down and go back to being as normal as possible.

'Hi, is that 80th Street residence?' she asked down her cell.

'It is, this is Patricia speaking how can I help you?'

'Oh, I've been looking on your website and I… my mother has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and I was wondering if myself and my husband could come and have a look around and ask some questions?'

'Oh,' said Patricia. 'I… that would be absolutely fine if we had any vacancies but I'm afraid we don't have any beds available at the minute.'

'Oh.' Meredith breathed.

'I… I can take some contact details and give you a call if anything comes up, but I have to inform you that there is a waiting list, so if it's urgent I'm afraid its unlikely your mother will be able to reside with us.'

'Oh… Oh. I'm sorry, I should have realised there wouldn't just be a vacancy.' She sighed. 'Thank you so much, I'll leave my details just in case if that's alright?'

'Of course.'

She sighed as she hung up the phone after giving Patricia her name and number, that was the best one on her list. It was close, it was relatively cheap and it looked nice and homely, rather than cold and clinical. She dialled the next number, hoping for a better result.

Her heart sunk as she was told time and time again that there were no vacancies available. There was only one which was available for her mom, but it was way out of her price range. It was almost double what they were paying in Seattle, but it was all that was left. She wanted to ask Derek's help, but she also wanted to handle it on her own. She didn't want to drag him into any more of this stress, but it was hopeless. Her time was up and she had to go to Dr. Hond in five minutes, but they needed more options.

She thought about calling the Seattle home and seeing if they had any partner homes in New York or something, surely that would be a good idea? Maybe then they could transfer the payments they made. It was worth a shot surely.

'Hi this is Pendlebrooke house Melissa speaking how may I help you?'

'Oh, hi, this is Dr. Meredith Shepherd, my mother is a resident with you. Ellis Grey.'

'Oh, hello Mrs. Shepherd, how can I help you?'

'I… I was just wondering if there's a manager I could speak to?'

'Of course.' The woman replied. 'Just give me a moment and I'll hand you over to one.'

'Thank you.' Meredith smiled, taking a deep breath as the line went silent for a moment.

'Mrs. Shepherd,' a maternal voice came down the phone. 'My names Amanda, I believe we met last week when your mother began residing with us?'

'Oh, hi Amanda.' She smiled.

'How can I help you today?'

'I… I know this is probably not what you want to be hearing right now especially since my mom only moved in last week… but…. Me and Derek are having second thoughts.'

'Oh, I see.'

'It's nothing personal about the home or the level of care my mom is receiving. We were both so comfortable leaving her in your capable hands. It's just… living in New York…. Its so far away. If anything were to happen to her or if I needed to make any big… decisions…. It makes things difficult.'

'That's understandable.' Amanda replied warmly.

'I've been looking at homes here on the East Coast but nowhere seems to have a vacancy except one really expensive place. Which is really nice don't get me wrong, but it's just ridiculously expensive and totally out of mine and Derek's price range. And I was just wondering if the home is owned by a chain or something? If there are any homes over here that we can transfer her to that could help her jump up the waiting list? Or if there's any homes you can recommend or something?' she asked hopefully, biting her lip slightly.

'I'm afraid not, Mrs. Shepherd,' Amanda sighed regretfully. 'We have two sister homes but both of them local. We cant transfer your mom anywhere else any quicker or more economically than you registering her yourself.'

'Oh,' Meredith sighed. 'It was kind of a long shot anyway. Thank you though, Amanda.'

'Before you go,' the woman continued. 'I might want to highlight to you the clause in your contract. The six months initial payment must be paid even if your mother no longer resides with us.'

'What?' Meredith breathed.

'The contract states that death is the only break in the binding, if you decide to move your mother elsewhere before the six months is over, you will still have to pay the monthly fee.'

'I….'

'I know it's not fair,' Amanda sighed. 'And I don't make the rules. But I'm afraid it's what the contract says. And so if you and your husband are on a budget, I'd suggest putting your mother on as many waiting lists as possible and waiting until her six months is up before you rush her somewhere new. Otherwise you'll be paying for two fees at once.'

'Oh…. I see.'

'I'm sorry I couldn't be more help to you, Meredith.'

'Oh, no.' she shook her head, feeling tears build up in her eyes. 'I… you've been very informative. Thank you.'

'No problem.'

'I… is my mother doing well?'

'She is. She had no trouble eating her dinner last night and is sat chatting to one of our other residents as we speak.'

'Great,' Meredith whispered, fighting her tear ducts. 'Thanks, Amanda. Send her my love.'

'Of course.'

'Thanks. Bye.'

'Bye Meredith.'

Crap. She really needed things to be simple, and they were turning out to be anything but. Maybe their amazing solution wasn't that amazing after all.

 _Thank you so much for reading! Please please review! X_


	11. Chapter 11

_Hi guys I'm sorry for the super slow update! Things have been a bit crazy with me but I'm finally in a better head space and hopefully will have a few days to myself this week to try and bring you another update. Thank you so much for all the kind reviews and thank you so much for reading._

Derek grinned as he unlocked the door to his and Meredith's appointment, he'd been on a forty eight hour shift and had hardly seen his wife. She'd left the hospital an hour before him, as he was still scrubbed in on Dr. Reed's surgery, and he was looking forward to climbing into bed with her and hopefully ordering some food in. He was starving, and as much as he loved Meredith, her cooking skills just weren't her finest.

He knew the chief had given her some time to look at sorting something out for Ellis, and so he was hoping she'd have some sort of plan as to what to do next. He had no idea when they would fit in looking around different homes like they did in Seattle, especially without the help Richard had given them. But it was much better than the alternative, so he was okay with looking around after a long shift when he was still dead to the world, if it meant the three of them got to stay in New York.

The smell of pizza came over him as he opened the door, seeing Meredith sat on the couch having almost devoured a large pepperoni one.

'Hey,' he smiled, throwing his coat on the chair.

'Hey,'

'This for me?' he asked, picking up the bug pizza box on the kitchen table.

'Yeah,' she nodded with her mouthful. 'Chicken and sweetcorn.'

'Thank you.' He murmured, joining her on the couch and placing a kiss on her cheek.

'How was the surgery?'

'Good.' He grinned. 'He's in post op and has a long recovery but Reed thinks he's going to be just fine.'

'That's great.'

'I know,' he almost moaned as he bit into his stringy pizza. 'This is so good.'

'I know right.' She agreed.

'I could sleep forever.'

'Me too.' She admitted.

'It was a lot for a first day back.'

'It was.' She breathed.

'Shall we have an early night tonight?'

'Yeah,' she nodded, standing up to put her pizza box in the bin and walking over to the cupboard to get a glass. 'Do you want a drink?'

'Water please.' He nodded.

'Okay,' she breathed, getting it for him.

'You okay?' he frowned, she was being awfully quiet.

'Fine.' She said, handing his drink to him. 'I'm going to change.'

'Okay,' he nodded, confused. He knew she was probably tired, as he was. Working a forty eight hour shift straight after arriving back had been tough. But she had hardly touched him since he'd walked through the door, and the last time he'd seen her properly she'd been lay under him in bliss. It just seemed weird.

'Hey,' he breathed, grabbing a slice of pizza out of the box and standing in the doorway. 'You okay?'

'I told you I'm fine.' She said quickly, pulling his Dartmouth sweater over her head and slipping on some bed shorts.

'You just seem off.'

'I'm fine.'

'Okay,' he nodded. 'Just checking.'

'Okay.' She said, sitting on the bed and pulling some socks out of the drawer.

'I'm allowed to be worried about you,' he said quietly, sitting next to her and placing a kiss on her cheek.

'I know,' she murmured.

'I love you.' He whispered, tilting her chin to kiss her gently.

'Love you too.' She breathed. 'Are you coming to bed soon?'

'I was just going to finish my pizza.'

'Can you eat it in bed?' she pouted.

'Mer you know how much I hate eating in bed.' He scrunched his nose.

'Please, I want to get in bed.'

'Fine.' He sighed, walking back into the living room to bring the box into their bedroom, placing it on the bed while he got changed.

She snuggled right up to his side as he sat up in the bed, leaning against the headboard as he continued to eat his pizza. Her head rested on his shoulder as she wrapped her arms around his waist.

'You sure you're okay?' he asked.

'Yeah.' She whispered.

'What time are you in tomorrow?'

'Rounds.'

'Me too.' He smiled. 'So we get a whole…' he trailed off before glancing at the clock. 'Ten hours before we have to be back at the hospital?' he grinned.

'Yeah,' she smiled up at him softly.

'Eight hours of sleep.' He breathed, kissing her nose.

'Derek,' she giggled. 'You're all greasy.'

'Sorry,' he laughed.

'Hmmm, it's okay.' She murmured, kissing his cheek before putting her head back on his chest.

'So how was your day?'

'Busy,' she breathed. 'I was in the ER all day.'

'Ouch. Who was running it?'

'Torres.'

'Oh, that's not too bad.'

'No, I like her.' She nodded. 'How was Reed?'

'Okay, not that busy apart from the surgery.'

'Hmmmmm.' She breathed.

'You sure you're okay?' he frowned.

'Yes, Derek.' she sighed, before quickly adding: 'Sorry.'

'It's okay,' he murmured, moving to rub her forearm gently. 'You just don't seem okay.' he ducked his head down to meet her eyes, searching them with his own.

'Don't Derek,' she whined, turning away from him.

'What?' he breathed.

'Don't,' she repeated, moving away from him and standing up by the side of the bed, pacing her head in her hand.

'Meredith please,' he said, putting his pizza box on the floor. 'You're worrying me, what's wrong?'

'Don't... don't look at me...'

'Don't look at you?' he frowned, his heart clenching in his chest.

'Cause when you look at me like that I can't lie to you... and when you look at me like that I can't make you mad I know you're gonna get mad and you're going to hate me and I don't want you to get mad and hate me because I hate when you're mad at me because I love you and I-'

'Okay, okay,' he murmured, moving towards her and 'Slow down, just slow down.'

'No...' she whispered, turning away from him as he tried to pull her into his arms.

'Mer please,' he breathed, tentatively brushing her arms with his fingertips. 'You're really beginning to worry me. I'm scared, Mer.'

She didn't reply, she just simply leaned back into his arms, allowing him to encircle his arms around her waist.

'It's only me,' he breathed in her ear softly. 'You can tell me.'

'Derek...' she shook her head.

'Tell me.' he coaxed. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.' she whispered. 'And that's why I dont want to tell you. You'll get mad.'

'Mer, unless you're talking about moving to Seattle again I can promise you I wont get mad.' he laughed gently, squeezing her. His smile began to fade when his wife failed to respond to him. She was looking down at the floor, her eyes squeezed shut. 'Meredith...'

'I...' she breathed, turning to face him quickly, his arms dropping from around her.

'No.' he said firmly, shaking his head. 'Meredith, don't.' he said a little louder.

'See! You're already mad and I haven't even explained.'

'You don't need to.' he glared at her before turning and walking into the bathroom.

'Derek.' She shouted after him. 'Derek!' she came into the doorway. 'Don't walk away from me, Derek.'

'And don't talk to me about moving when we already agreed to move your mom out here, we have a solution!'

'No, we don't.' she snapped.

'Yes, we do.'

'No, Derek! We don't! Not unless you have a magic money tree!'

'What?' he frowned, picking his toothbrush out of the holder.

'There's no chance we can move her out here, Derek. The prices are crazy.'

'And the price of moving to Seattle isn't?' he said indignantly.

'No.' she said calmly.

'I'm done here.' he shook his head, running the water.

'How did I know that would be your response?' she laughed harshly. 'Just walk away from it Derek and hope I'll give up and it'll go away.'

'Don't!' he snapped, slamming his toothbrush down. 'Don't! I am not moving to Seattle. End of story.'

'You haven't even heard me out.'

'How many times, I don't need to.'

'I called the home today, and apparently we have a six month fixture clause. We have to pay for the first six months up front for my mom even if we move her. And then the cheapest home I could find here with a vacancy is well out of our price range, Derek, well out. So if we moved her out here then we'll be paying almost triple what we're paying now for the next sixth months and then almost double what we're paying now until she dies.'

'And you think moving to Seattle will be cheaper than that? When we're on less pay?'

'We might not be on less pay.' she said quietly, meeting his eye.

'What?' he frowned dismissively.

'We might not be on less pay.'

'We earn barely anything as it is, let alone when we're at some crappy hospital.'

'We might not be at a crappy hospital.'

'Oh yeah, because we're really going to get something better than Sinai, fourth in the country.'

'Seattle Grace.'

'What?'

'I called Richard today... and explained... and... Seattle Grace, Derek.'

He stood still, staring at her.

'It's number two, Derek.'

'I know what number it is!' he shouted.

'It's better than the program we're in now.'

'I'm not going.' he pushed past her, back into their bedroom.

'I didn't ask you to come with me!' she shouted, exasperated. 'I was telling you I've figured out one of the problems. We wouldn't be on less pay and we'd have even better jobs, hell- I fixed two problems!'

'I'm not going.' he repeated, climbing into bed and picking up his book from his bedside table.

'So now you're going to be so rude to open your book and ignore me?' she demanded.

'Are you kidding?' he snapped.

'A conversation, Derek. That's all I'm asking for. Communication. We need to talk about this.'

'No we don't.'

'Of course not, because you dont want to talk about things you dont like you just want them to go away. But I need to talk about it. We need to talk about it. This is a huge deal Derek and if we dont talk about it then...'

'Then what?' he asked carefully.

'I... I don't know.' she sighed, sitting on the end of his bed next to his feet. 'I don't know. But what I do know is that I love you and I want us to be okay and I've already researched how much it would cost for me to move out there by myself in a one bed apartment while you stay here with your family so that you don't have to give anything up but if you don't talk to me about that then you'll come home one day and I'll be gone and we'll be in trouble, Derek. Big trouble. And I don't want us to be in trouble because I love you.'

'You're serious?' he raised his eyebrows.

'I'm serious.' she nodded. 'Derek?'

'I...' he trailed off, running his fingers through his hair. 'I'm going to sleep on the couch.'

'Derek?!' she stood and turned after him as he walked out of the doorway.

'I'm sleeping on the couch.'

'You said that.' she said flatly, sitting on the couch before he could. 'Are you kidding?'

'Am I kidding?' he laughed. 'More like are you kidding?'

'I just told you that I'll move there on my own, I'll go on my own and you don't have to. You can stay here with your job and your family and your friends and you don't have to give up anything-'

'I have to give up you!' he shouted, banging his hand on the table.

'Oh...' she breathed as his eyes flitted away from hers. 'I...'

'We're talking about babies, Meredith. _Babies_.'

'I... I know...' she whispered.

'We're talking about having babies and saving for a house and... and now you want to move across the country from me?'

'No!' she gasped.

'Well that's what you just said.'

'I don't want to move across the country from you, Derek. I have to.'

'No, you don't.'

'Derek! You're not getting it. We haven't got another solution. And while we're wasting time pretending we're going to find one, my mother is getting sicker and sicker and could have an emergency or a fall or anything!'

'You seriously think living six hours away from each other is going to solve the problem? You think it's going to save us from danger?'

'Well it's better than you resenting me for making you move.'

'No, it's not!' he snapped.

'We're not getting anywhere.' she said, shaking her head and standing up from the couch. 'You're not listening and you're not communicating.'

'My wife just told me she's moving to the other side of the country and you think I don't have the right to be mad? To be upset?'

Upset. The word struck a chord in her and her heart clenched as she looked at her husband. There were tears in his eyes and there was anger etched in his features. But there were tears in his eyes and he was upset. This was a huge deal. She knew it was a huge deal. But somehow right now it seemed huger.

'You do.' she said quietly, nodding. 'You do.'

'Hmmmmmm.'

'I... I'll sleep out here tonight, you have the bed. And we can talk tomorrow.'

'I dont want to sleep in the bed.' he shook his head.

'Are you sure? You should have it.'

'I just said I dont want it.' he said sharply.

'Okay.' she breathed. 'I...okay.'

'Hmmmm.'

'We'll talk tomorrow.'

'Hmmmm.'

She moved back to the doorway of their bedroom. 'I love you.'

'Love you too.' he mumbled as he stretched out.

'Okay,' she whispered, tears in her own eyes as she climbed into their bed, alone.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	12. Chapter 12

_Hi guys! Once again another huge delay in update and I'm really sorry:( This chapter was originally going to be a lot longer but it's still not finished and so I decided to split it into two so that I could put something up tonight. I hope you enjoy it because I love Derek's family, and so the next two chapters heavily involve them. Thank you for reading and please review!_

It wasn't often that Olivia got to visit her family, being a second year resident didn't give her much free time to fly back to New York. But this weekend she and Dexter both had the weekend off, which was a rarity, and were back in Manhattan to see everyone. The previous day, she, Lara and her mom had been out for lunch with Jack while Dex and Mark went to the baseball game, and then she'd been out with her other two sisters for drinks at night. It had been great, she hadn't seen them in two months and having a drink was very much needed. Jack already seemed so much bigger than the last time she had seen him, and it was scary how much she was missing out on. She only lived an hour away, but the demands of her job meant it was hard to come over a lot.

Having said that, it was the same for most of her other siblings, Mark and Derek were also owned by the hospital, Claire was living at the office these days trying to get a promotion, it was only Imogen who seemed to have a normal nine to five job which allowed for a social life. She had an admiration for her younger sister, she never knew what she wanted to do. Never did what people expected her to do. And here she was, working at an advertising company doing work she loved with a great group of friends, confident in herself and with a new guy who she seemed to really like.

None of them had met this new man, she had met him at work and been seeing him for almost four months, and the day before her mom had invited him to Sunday family dinner. Imogen hadn't spoken about him much, she was always quite cagey about boys, but she did know that he was called Danny. Danny. She'd seen a picture and he looked nice, he was attractive and tall and they looked really cute together. And she couldn't wait for them to arrive as she looked out of the window of her mom's living room.

'Liv, stop watching.' Murmured Dexter next to her.

'I am not watching,' she rolled her eyes.

'Yes you are.' Said Claire.

'Okay fine, maybe I'm watching.'

'It could be Meredith and Derek next, and then you'll be disappointed.' Her sister pointed out.

'I would not be disappointed,' she frowned. 'I haven't seen Derek in ages, or Meredith.'

'I do hope Meredith's alright,' Sighed Alison. 'I cant imagine how hard it must be with her mother.'

'Shit yeah.' Breathed Claire. 'Do we know what's going on with that?'

'They have her in a home.' Nodded Liv.

'In Seattle?'

'Yeah.' She sighed.

'I spoke to Derek the day they got back, Ellis didn't even know who Meredith was. It must have been incredibly difficult.'

'Shit.' Claire muttered.

'Can you stop swearing around my child please?' Said Lara.

'Oh he doesn't even know what it means.' Said Claire, waving her hand in the air.

'With any luck it'll be his first word.' Smirked Mark.

'Remind me never to let you baby sit.' Quipped Lara as they heard the front door open.

'Hi,' smiled her youngest sister, a dark haired Danny following behind her. 'Guys, this is Danny. This is… my family,' she turned to her boyfriend.

'Hi,' he smiled nervously.

'Hi,' said Liv. 'I'm Olivia,'

'Oh, hi.' He smiled, turning towards her.

'Would the two of you like a drink?' asked Alison, stepping in as always to ensure he didn't feel too overwhelmed.

'Oh yeah, I need wine.' Groaned Imogen.

'Okay dear,' Alison laughed. 'White?'

'Please.' She nodded.

'And for you, Danny?'

'I'll just have a soda please, I'm driving.' He nodded.

'Of course, any in particular?'

'Lemonade would be good, thank you.'

'You're welcome. Why don't we sit at the table?' she suggested to the group. 'It's getting crowded in here and Meredith and Derek will be here soon.'

'Sure.' Nodded Imogen.

'Is Jack's high chair in the dining room mom?' asked Lara, taking her son off the floor.

'Yes it is sweetheart.'

'Hey, I wanna say hi to my nephew,' Imogen pouted, holding her arms out.

'You only saw him yesterday,' said Lara, passing her son over.

'And I missed him.' Imogen shrugged. 'Hello baby,' she cooed, cuddling Jack into her chest. 'I love you. Yes I do.' She said, making Jack laugh. 'I love you. And we have a new friend, look at that,' she turned the baby round. 'That's Danny. You wanna say hello?'

Danny laughed as Jack pulled a funny face, holding his hand out.

'Hi little guy,' he murmured, letting Jack wrap his hand around his finger.

'He likes you already,' Lara smiled. 'I'm Lara, and this is Joe.'

'Oh, hi.' Danny smiled. 'It's really nice to meet you.'

'Likewise.' Joe nodded.

'And I'm Dexter,' said Dex, 'Seeing as my girlfriend didn't introduce me.' Shooting a feign glare at Liv.

'Hey.' Danny nodded.

'Shall we go sit down at the table baba?' cooed Imogen. 'I think that's a yes.' She laughed. 'Shall I give you to mama so Danny can meet Aunt Claire and Uncle Mark? Yeah.' She giggled, kissing Jack's head and handing him back to Lara.

'I'm Claire,' Claire nodded, standing up. 'And that's Mark, our bother. Well, our non brother brother.'

'Oh, I've heard a lot about you guys Danny nodded, shaking Mark's hand.

'I wont threaten you until Derek gets here, we do it better as a team.' He winked. 'More intimidating.'

'Mark.' Imogen rolled her eyes.

'It's true.' He shrugged. 'We've done it with all your guys' boyfriends, as we always will. Deal with it.'

'You're jerks.'

'They're protective, it's nice.' Danny nodded.

'Yes. I like you.' Mark grinned. 'What was your name again? Dan?'

'Danny.' Said Imogen indignantly. 'I repeat, you're a jerk.'

'I thought we were moving to the table?' Said Alison coming back into the living room where Mark, Claire, Liv, Imogen and Danny were stood.

'We're coming now,' Imogen nodded, taking her wine and following her mom through. 'Did Meredith and Derek not get the four o'clock memo?' she asked, taking a seat with Jack on one side and Danny on the other.

'They did.' Alison nodded.

'Probably fucking.' Said Mark casually.

'Mark!' exclaimed Alison. 'Will you ever stop with the inappropriate jokes? Especially the ones about your brother and his wife.'

'Not unless they stop acting like teenagers.'

'They are not teenagers.' Alison shook her head.

'Oh come on Mom,' said Imogen. 'they totally are.'

'Im's right.' Liv nodded. 'It's annoying but amazing when you think about it.'

'It's disgusting.' Mark winced.

'A little,' shrugged Claire. 'But they're in love, it's cute.'

'Yeah, they're like the steadiest couple in this family.' Said Liv.

'Hey,' pouted Lara. 'We are married with a child?'

'Yeah but those two have been together for like, ever.' Said Liv bluntly. 'And he's still as in love with her as he was the first time he brought her home.'

'Oh my god, do you remember they weren't even together then?!' said Imogen.

'He was with the flower.' Mark laughed.

'Flower?' frowned Danny.

'Basically we met Mer at college and she became Derek's best friend. He fell in love with her but didn't think she liked him so got a girlfriend and it turned out she was in love with him the whole time so he ditched Rose- the flower, and then the two of them hitched up at the end of freshman year and have been together ever since.'

'Freshman year?' said Danny, impressed. 'Wow.'

'Is it like eight years or something?' Imogen asked.

'Yeah.' Nodded Liv. 'They're really cute.' She said to Danny.

'At least there's no pressure on us to try and be the perfect couple of the family when the golden couple will always reign.' Shrugged Imogen.

'That's a good point.' Said Liv. 'We all know they're mom's favourites and so it takes the sweat off.'

'They are not my favourites,' Alison laughed.

'Yeah right.' Claire rolled her eyes.

'I'm very fond of Meredith and I think they make a lovely couple.' Alison nodded. 'Just as I am with Joe and Dexter, and now Danny.'

'Oh please, mom.' Imogen laughed. 'You love them.'

'Of course I do, but I love you all.'

'Hmmmm.' Said Mark, unconvinced as they heard Meredith and Derek coming through the house.

'This is them,' Imogen said quietly to Danny. 'Sorry if they make you nauseous, I wish I could say they're not always like that. But they are.'

'Okay,' he laughed.

'Hey,' said Derek, lacking his usual beaming smile as he came through to the dining room, Meredith following behind him, a similar blue expression on her face.

'Derek,' Alison smiled, standing up to hug him. 'And Meredith sweetheart,'

'Hey,' Meredith breathed as Liv watched her mom hug her daughter in law.

'Hey Mer,' she grinned, standing up to give her friend a hug herself.

'Liv!' she grinned, pulling her close.

'I haven't seen you in so long.'

'Too long.' Meredith nodded.

'Oh, am I invisible now?' Smirked Derek.

'Hey you.' She grinned, moving to hug her brother.

'Hey man!' said Dex from across the table.

'Hey,' Derek grinned. 'Are we alright to sit there?' he asked, gesturing to the two seats opposite Liv and Dex.

'Of course.' Liv nodded. 'As long as Mer sits opposite me so we don't have to listen to you three.' She looked at Derek, Mark and Dexter.

'Sure.' Meredith smiled, following Derek and sitting down.

'Derek, this is Danny.' Imogen said unusually politely. 'And Danny, this is my brother Derek and his wife Meredith. But we just call her Mer.' She grinned.

'Hi.' Danny nodded.

'Hi,' Smiled Derek, extending his hand over the table before turning to Mark. 'You had the talk?'

'No man I was waiting for you.'

'Okay.' He nodded.

'Can I get you guys a drink?' asked Alison, standing up.

'I'll get them, Ma.' Said Claire. 'I need a drink anyway.

'Are you sure? Thank you sweetheart.'

'Yeah.' She nodded. 'What do you guys want?'

'I'll have a beer.' Nodded Derek.

'And I'll have a white wine please.' Smiled Meredith.

'Okay,'

'So Danny,' asked Derek. 'You work in the same office as Imogen?'

'Oh, yes.' He nodded. 'I do.'

'Do you like it there?'

'I love it. The work is really great, I don't dread going every day.'

'I bet you don't,' murmured Mark.

'Mark don't be disgusting.' Said Lara. 'We're getting to know him.'

'Sorry.'

'Good.'

'Are you from New York?' asked Olivia.

'Yeah,' he nodded, but I went to college in LA.'

'Oh wow.' Liv breathed. 'That's amazing.'

'Yeah.' He nodded. 'I really enjoyed it, but I couldn't live on the West Coast full time, so I came back. You guys live in Boston, right?'

'Yeah.' Liv nodded, turning to Dexter. 'We stayed there after Med School.'

'Is that where you guys met?'

'Kind of,' Liv frowned. 'These guys went to Dartmouth pre-med,' she said, turning to Meredith and Derek who were uncharacteristically sat completely untouching, a pained look in Meredith's eyes, and a hostile one in Derek's. 'Derek and Mark made friends with Dex and Tim, and then I moved out there for Med School.'

'I see.' Danny nodded. 'So are you both doctors?'

'I am,' Liv nodded. 'A surgical resident. Dex works for graphic design.'

'You do?' Danny's eyes lit up.

'Yeah,' nodded Dexter.

'Wow, do you enjoy it?'

'I do.' He nodded. 'I didn't know what I was going to do with my art major, everyone tells you there's no jobs in it. But I've done okay.'

'You've done more than okay.' Smiled Alison. 'He's doing wonderfully.'

'Thanks.' He smiled warmly. 'Most of them are doctors though, there's only a few of us normal ones.' He joked.

'True.' Cut in Imogen as Claire came back.

'We are normal,' Lara rolled her eyes.

'Lara's a doctor, Joe's a doctor, Mark's a doctor, Derek's a doctor and Meredith's a doctor. It's only us, Dex and Claire who aren't.'

'That is a lot of doctors.' Danny nodded.

'What time is dinner, mom?' Olivia asked.

'Should be ready in ten minutes.'

'I am starving.'

'You're always starving.' Dexter rolled his eyes.

'I've been craving one of mom's meals for like two months, you cant blame me for being excited.'

'What are we having, Ma?' asked Lara, stroking the top of Jack's head.

'Chicken stew with dumplings, and a chocolate cake for dessert.'

'Mmmmmm.' Liv groaned. 'That sounds so good.'

'It does.' Claire agreed.

'It feels so weird us all being here for family dinner.' Said Lara.

'I know.' Nodded Mark. 'When will we next get to see you guys?' he asked Liv.

'I'm not sure.' She sighed, stealing another glance at her brother and his wife who were remaining mute. If things were normal right now his hand would be on her thigh or his arm around her shoulder, but instead they weren't even looking at each other. They were always looking at each other.

'Maybe we can come out and see you in a couple of months when Jack's a little older, putting him on a plane is my worst nightmare.' Lara laughed.

'It wouldn't be pleasant.' Agreed Joe.

'Of course,' Liv nodded. 'Whenever you guys want to come, you're welcome. What about you guys?' she turned to Meredith and Derek. 'What are you guys like for time off with your intern life?'

'Oh,' breathed Meredith, avoiding Derek's eyes. 'We wont be getting any time off any time soon.'

'The chief already gave us a week off to go to Seattle.' Derek said flatly.

'Oh shit yeah, I forgot. How was that?'

'Oh…' Meredith repeated, and Liv could see her fidgeting with her hands on her lap. 'Okay… it was okay.'

'I cant possibly begin to imagine how hard that was for you, dear.' Said Alison.

'Her mom has Alzheimer's.' Imogen whispered to Danny.

'Thanks.' Meredith said quietly. 'It was sad.'

An awkward silence fell over the table when Meredith failed to elaborate, and Derek sat with an uninterested look on his face. His body language showing no affection at all for his wife, who the rest of the table were sympathising with.

'Well, I'll go and get dinner sorted. Mark would you mind giving me a hand?'

'Sure.' He nodded, following her into the kitchen.

'So how's working for Mark, Derek?' Liv smirked.

'That's classic man.' Laughed Dex.

'Technically I don't work for him.' Derek rolled his eyes. 'He's not my resident.'

'He's Mer's though.' She laughed.

'My resident's good.' Derek nodded.

'Oh, the one Mark's sleeping with?' Laughed Imogen.

'Mark's sleeping with Torres?' Gasped Derek.

'Why do you sound so surprised?' Frowned Imogen. 'It's Mark.'

'True.' He shrugged.

'Here we go,' said Alison, reentering the room with two plates in her hand. 'Pass them down will you?' She said, handing Claire the first one to be passed down to Meredith.

'Thank you Alison.' Meredith breathed as her dinner reached her.

'You're very welcome sweetheart.' She smiled warmly.

'Thanks ma.' Said Derek as his dinner reached him, and Liv watched them again, still no words between them. They hadn't even exchanged a look. Something was off with them, which was weird because things were never off between her brother and sister in law. They had the relationship all of them dreamed of.

'This looks amazing, ma.' Grinned Mark as he sat back down next to Derek. 'What were we all talking about?'

'You being Derek's boss.' Said Dexter.

'And you sleeping with his resident.' Smirked Lara. 'How did I not know you and Torres were a thing?'

'Because we're not,' Mark chuckled, shaking his head.

'But you're sleeping with her?' Claire clarified.

'Yeah.' He shrugged.

'I like Torres, she's good.' Nodded Lara.

'But I'm the best resident to have, aren't I Grey?' Mark winked at Meredith, who was eating silently, seeming distracted.

'Oh, yeah.' She nodded.

'You're not supposed to agree, Mer.' Liv laughed.

'Right.' She laughed nervously.

'Is it a shock to the system being back at the hospital after a week off?'

'A bit yeah.' Meredith nodded.

'It wasn't exactly a holiday.' Said Derek, his voice laced with humour, but only slightly.

'Yeah, still pretty intense for you guys.' Agreed Imogen.

'Yeah.' Meredith whispered.

The awkward silence fell over the table once again as Meredith remained silent, with no sign of Derek contributing any more.

'So Claire,' said Joe. 'Any news on the promotion?'

'Oh, no.' Claire shook her head. 'But I've been putting the most hours in out if everyone who I thinks applied, so I'm hoping.'

'When will you find out, do you know?'

'I think next week.' She nodded.

'That's great, you'll have to let us know how it goes.'

'I will.' She smiled. 'Why do I feel like you don't want me to get it so that I can babysit again?' She laughed.

'I never said such thing.' Joe laughed as Lara rolled her eyes.

'Ignore him.' Said Lara. 'Maybe Imogen can try again.'

'Absolutely not.' She shook her head. 'I love him but that kid hates me, babysitting would be a disaster.'

'He doesn't hate you!' Lara laughed.

'He does.' Pouted Imogen.

'Anyway, Danny can help you now.' Said Mark.

'Sure.' Danny smiled.

'No,' Imogen shook her head at her boyfriend. 'That's not happening, don't say that.'

'Okay.' He nodded. 'I take it back.' He added quickly, laughing.

The conversation continued onto Jack and his sleeping habits, and then onto Mark's cool surgery, and then onto Dexter's sisters wedding. All the while Olivia kept an eye on the couple opposite her, not uttering a word to each other or anyone else. It was kind of worrying, because when Meredith and Derek fell out it was always over something big. Their little spats normally lasted less than a day and ended with them all over each other in no time. But they never acted like this at family dinner, and even when they'd all been at med school together she'd never known them be this quiet around each other. When they were fighting, they normally made little digs at each other and shared angry looks, but this was completely different.

After they'd finished eating, Alison suggested having a break before dessert, which she'd made especially for Meredith knowing it was her favourite after her tough week in Seattle. That was another weird thing, this last week must have been impossible for her friend, and for her borother to carry on a fight when he knew what his wife was going through just didn't seem like him. The whole thing didn't make sense.

'Should we do the dishes Mer?' Olivia asked, picking up her own plate. 'Have a catch up and kill two birds with one stone? I haven't seen you in ages.'

'Sure,' Meredith smiled, looking relieved.

'Are you sure girls?' Asked Alison. 'You're both guests.'

'Don't be stupid Ma,' Liv laughed. 'Plus we've both lived here before, we can do some dishes for you. And maybe the boys can do the rest after dessert.'

'Fine by me.' Nodded Mark.

'Thank you both.' Alison smiled as they carried most of the plates into the kitchen, Mark bringing through the rest.

'So,' said Liv, turning the water on as Meredith began sorting the dishes. 'How are things with you?'

'Good.' Meredith nodded.

'Mer,' Olivia cocked her head, looking at her expectantly.

'What?'

'Things are obviously not good with you.'

'Wha- oh, my mom and stuff obviously.' She said quickly, putting a pile of plates in the sink. 'But I'm fine, really.'

'You don't seem fine.'

'What's that even supposed to mean?' Meredith rolled her eyes, and Olivia could tell her friend was in her usual denial state.

'You and Derek.' She said simply.

'Me and Derek?' Meredith laughed nervously. 'There's nothing wrong with me and Derek.'

'Mer, seriously?' Liv raised her eyebrows. 'You guys aren't even looking at each other.'

'Yes we are!' She gasped.

'No Mer, you're not. You're being really weird.'

'We are not being really weird.' She insisted.

'Yeah, you are.'

'Liv,' she groaned. 'Leave it.'

'Mer, you're my friend.'

'And he's your brother,' she replied.

'Like that's ever stopped you telling me about your arguments.'

'We're not having an argument.' she shook her head.

'Then what's wrong?' she prodded, being able to read her friend's body language.

'I don't want to talk about it.' Meredith shook her head quickly.

'Mer-'

'I said I don't want to talk about it okay.' she said quietly.

'Okay.' Nodded Liv. 'If you're sure?'

'Liv!' Meredith breathed, tears suddenly forming in her eyes. Whatever was going on was obviously very raw, Meredith hardly ever cried, she always just brushed stuff off like it was nothing.

'Shit, sorry...' she mumbled, putting down the plate she was holding and moving over to her friend and wrapping her arms around her. 'I won't ask... but it's okay, Mer.' she breathed as her friend reciprocated the hug. 'I just... you guys are never like this and the last time you seemed this weird was that time you almost broke up because of your mom in sophomore year. I'm just worried.'

Her friend didn't respond, she merely cried into her shoulder which was definitely not a good sign.

'Oh Mer,' she murmured, rubbing her back gently. 'I didn't mean to upset you.'

'It's okay.' she sniffled, her head still buried in her shoulder until she pulled away wiping at her eyes quickly.

'I'll get you a tissue.' Liv said quickly, pulling one out of the box on the windowsill and passing it to her friend. 'Don't cry Mer.' she said sadly.

'Sorry.' she sniffled.

'Don't be stupid.' Liv shook her head, reaching for Meredith's hand and squeezing it. 'I just hate seeing you upset.'

'Yeah.' Meredith whispered, wiping at her wet eyes again.

'Are you sure you don't want to talk about it? Later maybe after everyone's left the table we could go upstairs?'

'No,' Meredith shook her head. 'I can't, but thanks Liv.' she said shakily.

'Course you can.' she murmured. 'It's only me. I won't judge whatever it may be.'

'No,' Meredith shook her head again. 'I... I can't.'

'Just because I'm Derek's sister... it doesn't mean I'm going to be on his side.' she said firmly. 'Unless you've cheated on him.' she added casually before her eyes widened as a wave of panic washed over her. 'You've not cheated on him have you?!'

'No, no.' Meredith insisted, shaking her head. 'Liv I wouldn't... I couldn't... I love him.'

'I know you do.' she nodded, sighing in relief.

'I love him so much.'

'Oh, Mer. Whatever it is can't be that bad then, you both love each other so much.'

'I don't know,' she whispered as another tear traced down her cheek.

'Mom!' Liv said suddenly as Alison came through and into the kitchen, causing Meredith to wipe her eyes quickly and look straight down at the floor.

'Oh Meredith dear,' she breathed, concern lacing her tone. 'whatever is the matter sweetheart?'

'Oh, nothing.' Meredith shook her head as her mom pulled her into a quick hug.

'It's hardly nothing sweetheart, you look terribly upset.'

'I'm okay,' she nodded unconvincingly. 'Really.'

'Do you want me to go and get Derek?'

'No.' Meredith shook her head immediately. 'No.'

'Oh...' Alison breathed, stealing a look at her daughter who simply shook her head. 'Let me get you a fresh tissue sweetheart.'

'Thanks.' Meredith said quietly.

'Whatever is the matter?' Alison asked softly, wrapping an arm around Meredith. 'Is this about your mom?'

'No. Yes. ...No.' breathed Meredith shakily.

'That sounds complicated.' said Alison, and Liv knew her mom didn't want to push her sister in law who wasn't good opening up to people.

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded.

'Why don't the two of you go upstairs and have a chat? Mark and Derek can do the dishes.' Alison suggested.

'No I'm fine really.' said Meredith. 'I might go to the bathroom and just splash my face with some cold water and take a minute.'

'Only if you're sure.' Alison breathed.

'Yeah.' Meredith tried to smile. 'Thank you.'

'That's alright dear.' her mom kissed her forehead softly. 'You go and take a few moments to yourself and Olivia and I will do the dishes.'

'Okay.' she breathed, leaning into Alison before heading down the corridor and up the stairs to the house's main bathroom.

'Now whatever is the matter with the poor girl?' asked Alison as soon as Meredith was out of earshot.

'I really don't know.' Liv shrugged. 'I mean, I know it's to do with Derek. They've fought about something, though I don't know what. However I do know she hasn't cheated on him.'

'Of course she hasn't Olivia Shepherd.' Alison shook her head. 'That girl loves your brother like crazy.'

'I know that ma, I'm just saying it isn't worst case scenario.'

'Hmmmm.'

'What are you thinking?'

'I just... whatever they've fought about must be serious if Derek couldn't put it on hold for a while until she comes to terms with her mother.'

'I know.' Liv murmured.

'I hate seeing her so upset like that.'

'I know, me too.' she sighed. 'I plan to get to the bottom of it before we go home.'

'That would be good, make sure she opens up to someone.'

'Yeah.' Liv agreed. 'Shall we leave the dishes until later? Otherwise desserts going to be super late.'

'Yes.' Alison nodded. 'The cake is in the refrigerator. It might cheer Meredith up a little as well, I know its her favourite.'

'True.' Liv agreed as her mom took the dishes in her hands.

'The boys can do all the dishes later, and you and Meredith can have a chat.'

'Okay.'

'Dessert is ready everyone.' Alison smiled warmly at the family as Liv placed the cake on the table and her mom passed the dishes around. 'Meredith has just nipped to the bathroom.'

'This looks lovely, Ma.' grinned Imogen.

'Thank you sweetheart.' Alison replied. 'Oh Lara, love, would you mind getting the jug of cream out of the fridge, I forgot it.'

'Course.' Lara nodded.

'Now Derek this one's for Meredith.' Said Alison, passing him a bowl with the biggest piece of cake in.

'Okay.' he nodded, taking it off her and putting it in his wife's place.

'There you go Ma.' smiled Lara as she handed her mom the jug.

'Oh thank you darling.' Alison smiled as she took her seat at the head of the table. 'Now, you boys can do the washing up afterward. I'm afraid us girls didn't get round to it before.'

'Didn't get round to it?' Mark laughed. 'More like having a gossip, Liv and Grey can go at it for hours.'

'Not exactly.' Liv said flatly, shooting a look at Derek.

'What's that supposed to mean?' he frowned at her.

'Olivia.' Alison shook her head.

'Wait what's going on?' said Imogen quickly, looking at her sister.

'Nothing.' Said Alison. 'Olivia, leave it.'

'I haven't said anything.' she shrugged.

'Said anything about what?' asked Claire.

'Yeah, Mom what's going on?' said Imogen.

'Ask Derek.' Said Liv simply.

'Olivia honestly, stop.' Said Alison firmly. 'I'm sure Meredith and Derek don't want their business being discussed and it's not your place to do so.'

'Meredith and Derek's business?' frowned Imogen. 'What's going on?'

'Nothing.' groaned Derek.

'It doesn't seem like nothing.' continued Imogen.

'Imogen Sofia.' warned Alison.

'So where is Mer now?' Imogen asked Liv. 'Still in the bathroom?'

'Yeah.' Liv nodded.

'I'm gonna go and see if she's alright.'

'You will do no such thing.' Said Alison as Imogen stood up.

'But Ma-'

'Give her a minute to herself, and do not speak of anything when she gets back. I do not want her feeling her uncomfortable.'

'What the fuck have you done, Derek?' Imogen demanded.

'Language!' said Alison as Imogen remained standing.

'I haven't done anything!' Derek exclaimed.

'You clearly have.'

'Girls leave your brother alone.' Said Alison angrily. 'And stop causing such a scene.'

'I'm going to see if Mer's alright.' Imogen shook her head.

'I'm coming with you.' Nodded Liv.

'Mark, pass us her cake will you?' asked Imogen as Mark handed her Meredith's huge piece of chocolate cake.

'Thanks.' she nodded.

'Girls stop being dramatic.'

'You're the one who said I should talk to her.' pointed out Liv.

'But not like this, after making a scene in front of everyone.'

'Well Derek could go.' Said Imogen turning to her brother. 'She's obviously upset but he hasn't even offered to go up.'

'Mind your own business.' Derek snapped.

'You're being an ass.' Said Liv.

'I said mind your own business.' he repeated.

'To be fair we don't even know whats gone on.' said Claire.

'Thank you.' said Derek.

'I'm still going up.' Said Imogen.

'Me too.' Said Liv, following her sister out of the room.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	13. Chapter 13

_Hi guys! Thank you so much for reading and please please review X_

'Mer?' Imogen breathed as she knocked on the bathroom door where she and Liv could hear her sniffling.

'Give her a minute.' Liv murmured.

'We've got you chocolate cake?' Her sister said hopefully as Liv heard the lock slide and the door open slightly to reveal a red eyed Meredith with a tissue in her hand.

'Hey,' she said quietly.

'Hey,' breathed Liv. 'You okay?'

'Yeah,' Meredith nodded slightly.

'Do you want to go to my room?' Offered Imogen.

'Yeah.' She whispered.

'Here,' Imogen smiled, hanging her her dessert.

'Thanks.' Meredith smiled slightly.

'You're welcome.' Imogen grinned, wrapping an arm around their sister in law and Liv opened the door to Imogen's old bedroom and flicked on the light.

'Did your mom send you up here?' Meredith asked as she climbed onto Imogen's bed with them.

'No,' Liv shook her head, the opposite actually.

'She told you to come up before,' Imogen frowned. 'But she got mad when we left the table.' She shrugged.

'I didn't mean to cause a fuss.' Meredith said quietly.

'I know.' Imogen smiled. 'But we couldn't leave you up here upset.'

'Derek's being an ass, too.'

'Don't,' Meredith shook her head quickly. 'He's not.'

'Erm, he is Mer.' Said Imogen. 'I don't know what you guys have been fighting about but he's being an ass about it.'

'I...' Meredith breathed, trailing off as her eyes fell down.

'I think it's just cause you guys never fight.' Offered Liv. 'At lease not seriously anyway, you're always happy together. But today... everyone could tell something was off between you, you hardly even looked at each other.'

'We literally prepared Danny for your guys PDA,' Imogen laughed softly. 'And then it never happened, and as much as you two gross me out it bums me out to see you not your usual sickeningly in love selves.'

'You're like, the most in love couple in this whole family so it's just more obvious when you guys are going through a rough patch.' said Liv.

'Hmmmm.' Meredith breathed.

'Okay, my main question,' said Imogen. 'Are you okay?'

'Of course she's not okay.' hissed Liv. 'That's why we're up here.'

'Well obviously,' Imogen frowned. 'But you're not like... ill are you?'

'No, God no.' Meredith said quickly shaking her head.

'As if Derek would be like this if she was ill,' said Liv. 'He'd be all over her like a rash, being Mr. Protective.'

'I was just checking!' said Imogen. 'Okay, my second question. No offence by this one or anything but I have to ask, have you cheated on him?'

'No.' Meredith said instantly, shaking her head and looking at Liv. 'I love him, Im.'

'I already asked that one.' said Liv.

'Good.' Imogen nodded. 'Not that I think you would... for some reason you're totally into my nerd of a brother.'

'And you're actually a nice person.' Said Liv. 'I just... can't get why he's so mad if it's not something really serious.'

'It kind of is serious.' breathed Meredith. 'I mean... I'm not dying and I haven't cheated on him but...'

'Wait-' said Imogen suddenly. 'Has he cheated on you? Because if he has I swear to God I'm going to-'

'No,' Meredith shook her head, tears stinging her eyes as she cut Imogen off, who had stood up in anger. 'I... he wouldn't... he loves me. I know he does.'

'Thank God for that.' said Imogen, sitting back down.

'I... I can't tell you.' she said quietly.

'Of course you can, Mer.' said Liv. 'We're your sisters.'

'And he's your brother.' she pointed out. 'I don't want to put you guys in the middle, it's not fair.'

'You wont be.' shrugged Imogen.

'I... I will.' Meredith continued. 'It's... it's not a small fight and it's not going to be over anytime soon, at least I don't think it will anyway. And whatever the outcome is it's going to be bad because he's going to resent me either way.' she said sadly.

'Wait, this isn't about kids is it?' frowned Olivia. Derek had always wanted to be a dad, and he and Meredith had agreed to have kids after their residencies. 'Because he mentioned to me that you guys were planning to start trying earlier than you originally planned. Wait!' she said suddenly excited. 'Are you pregnant?!'

'Oh my God!' grinned Imogen. 'Are you?!'

'No,' Meredith shook her head. 'Not that I know of anyway.'

'Oh,' said Imogen, her shoulders deflating.

'Is it about work?' asked Liv.

'Again... not really but kind of... it's hard to explain...'

'Than just tell us.' said Imogen. 'Whatever it is cant be that bad.'

'He hates me.' Meredith whispered.

'What?! No he doesn't.' Imogen said emphatically. 'He loves you, Mer. You said it yourself.'

'I know but he... it's a really bad fight guys.'

'Maybe we can help.' said Liv.

'I...' Meredith frowned, still poking at her cake.

'We can be a completely rational independent third party.' Imogen nodded.

'But you wont be.' Meredith sighed.

'Yes we will.' Liv frowned.

'It's... its something really big... I already know you're going to take Derek's side.'

'No we are not.' said Imogen.

'Im, you haven't even heard what I have to say yet.'

'No but it doesn't automatically mean I'm going to take his side.'

'But I know you are.' she sighed. 'I would if I were you.'

'Then I'm confused. If you think we have reason to be on his side you must see his point of view and then why is it such a big fight?' asked Liv.

'I...' Meredith sighed, looking up and meeting Liv's eye. 'I don't want to be on my side.' she said. 'If that makes sense. I don't... I know why he's so angry... but it's something I have to do. If this were him, I know he would do the same and I would understand that and support him but he... I understand why it's hard for him.'

'Oh come on Mer, just tell us.' Begged Imogen.

'I...'

'We wont hate you or anything.' said Liv. 'And if we don't agree with whatever you're doing we'll still be supportive and not an ass about it like Derek.'

'He's not being an ass.' she shook her head. 'Okay maybe he is a little... he's not even hearing me out.'

'Being an ass.' nodded Imogen. 'So come on, spill.'

'I... fine.' Meredith sighed, sitting up a little straighter and putting her cake to the side. 'My mom... she's really sick. Like... really, really sick. And she doesnt have anybody in Seattle, the only person there is her ex boyfriend who's married. And so for obvious reasons he can't be there for her a lot, his wife isn't too happy about it seeing as at the time he was with my mom he was still married to her.' she took a deep breath. 'She could fall, or she could need to go to the hospital or whatever... or she could start acting out against the care workers... and I'd be six hours away... six. I... if something happened in that time and they couldn't reach me or they needed a decision on something I'd hate myself if something happened and it was my fault.'

Liv felt her stomach drop. She knew exactly where this was heading. And as sad as it made her, she also knew Meredith was right: if it were Derek in this situation, or any of them for that matter, they'd want to be there for their mom when she was sick.

'It wouldn't be your fault Mer.' murmured Imogen, reaching to softly grab Meredith's forearm and give her a small smile.

'It would feel like it.'

'So...' trailed off Liv. 'You want to go to Seattle?'

'Yeah.' Meredith whispered. 'I... they can't see her living that long so it would be a couple of years maximum. And Richard said he could keep a spot open at Seattle Grace fo me, well... us, but Derek doesn't want it so it would probably just be me. And then there's money... because it will be so expensive to move and then come back again. And then there's babies. If she lives longer than planned Derek doesnt want to have kids not in New York away from you guys, which I totally understand and agree with... so that's where babies come in.'

'Wait- what do you mean Derek doesnt want the job at Grace?' frowned Imogen.

'Well he's said he's not coming at all. So it would just be me.'

'You're going without him?' Imogen asked, shock evident in her tone.

'I don't know.' Meredith whimpered. 'I don't want to. But I... I really have to go.'

'Shit.' Said Imogen. 'So he's just said flat out no?'

'Yeah.' she breathed. 'I get why he has reservations but we'd have a job at Grace and we could live in my mom's old house, I know it wouldn't be the same as our home now but we could figure it out. And it wouldn't be for long, but he won't have any of it.'

'I... I don't know what to say.' Said Imogen. 'I mean, obviously I don't want you to go, but if you think it's the right thing to do...'

'I think at the very least you guys need to have a calm conversation about it.' Suggested Liv. 'I know what Derek can be like when he's upset and pissed, he doesn't listen.'

'He doesn't!' agreed Meredith. 'I just... he's being so off with me and I wish it was just something we could shake off or put right but...I need to go whether he comes or not and I really don't want to go without him. And if I do the last thing I want is for this to break us I... we could make it work.'

'It's not impossible.' nodded Liv, smiling weakly in an attempt to support her sister in law.

'People do it, right? We fly to see each other on our days off... it could be exciting... more special spending time together. And I would call him every single day. It... it would be crap and I know it would be crap, but I could put up with not seeing him everyday if I knew we were still together and when my mom does die I'll still have him. But I just... I don't know.' she sighed.

'Okay,' said Imogen. 'One thing is for sure you'll always have Derek, you know that.'

'Not necessarily.' Meredith said sadly. 'If he doesn't want to come and he doesn't want to do long distance...'

'Do you have to go?' asked Liv. 'Could you not bring your mom out here?'

'We wanted to do that.' Meredith nodded. 'But it's impossible- both financially and practically.'

'Shit.' Liv breathed as there was a knock at the bedroom door.

'Who is it?' Frowned Imogen.

'Mark.'

'Come in.' she sighed as their brother popped his head around the door.

'Just thought I'd let you know Derek's gone home.' he said to Meredith.

'What?' she breathed. 'He's left.'

'Yup.'

'What did he say?'

'Something about not being bothered dealing with you all.'

'Shit.' said Imogen. 'And he just went? He didn't say anything else?'

'Nope.' Mark shook his head. 'He wouldn't tell us whatevers up with him and Grey.'

'Because he's being an ass.' Liv mumbled.

'I need to go.' Meredith said quietly.

'No you don't.' said Imogen. 'He's being dramatic and wants attention.'

'I can't,' Meredith shook her head. 'I have to go. We need to talk.'

'Okay but if you guys fight call us okay? We'll come over or you can come here and we'll talk about it properly.'

'Thanks.' she whispered, smiling.

'You want a ride, Grey? I think Shep took the car.'

'If that's okay?' she nodded, standing up.

'No problem, we'll leave in five?'

'Okay.' she nodded as Mark shut the door behind him.

'I know Liv's leaving but we'll meet up this week and talk about it, let me know how things go tonight okay? Call me.'

'I will.' Meredith nodded. 'Thanks Im.'

'Come here,' said Imogen pulling her into a hug. 'I love you, Mer.'

'Love you too.' she murmured as Imogen squeezed her tightly.

'We're here for you,' said Liv, hugging Meredith next. 'don't think you have no one to talk to, even if we agree with Derek we're still your friends and we're going to support you and be there for you.'

'Thanks.' Meredith whispered. 'I hope we can talk tonight.'

'Me too.' mumbled Liv as Imogen opened the bedroom door and they filed out. Meredith grabbed her coat by the door and then headed into the dining room to say goodbye to everyone, and she knew as soon as her and Mark left, her mom would be all over her and her sister wanting to know what was going on.

'Hey,' Meredith said quietly, as they re-entered the room. 'I'm going to get off now, go and see Derek.'

'Okay sweetheart.' Alison replied as the rest of the family sat awkwardly, Lara offering Meredith a small smile. 'I do hope everything is alright,' she said as she stood up to hug Meredith quickly.

'Yeah.' she nodded. 'Thanks. And thank you for the cake. I'll see you soon.'

'Okay dear.' Alison smiled warmly. 'Mark are you ready to take her home?'

'Yeah,' nodded Mark, standing up.

'Bye Mer.' Smiled Lara.

'Bye guys,' Meredith nodded. 'It was nice to meet you Danny.'

'You too.' Danny smiled as Imogen sat down next to him.

'Remember to call us,' breathed Liv, squeezing Meredith's hand, before she nodded and followed Mark out.

'Okay so what the fuck is going on?' said Claire as soon as the front door closed and Olivia resumed her seat next to Dexter.

'Language, Claire.' Alison frowned.

'Sorry,' she sighed.

'Literally what can have happened thats so bad?' asked Lara. 'Those two are like, solid as a rock.'

'That's what I said.' Sighed Imogen.

'I don't know if we should say.' said Liv, glancing at her sister across the table.

'It's not our place.' Imogen shook her head. 'But I'm sure you'll all find out soon enough anyway. They've got to, right?' she asked Liv.

'Yeah.' she sighed. 'It's nothing like... cheating or anything though,' she reassured them.

'They'd never cheat on each other.' said Dexter, waving his hand slightly.

'It's just so weird for them to fight.' said Lara.

'I know.' Imogen sighed.

'But what I don't get is whose in the wrong... if Meredith's upset and so is Derek one of them's obviously not begging for the others forgiveness.' said Claire.

'It's not like that.' Imogen shook her head. 'But I think they're going to be fine. I...' she glanced at Liv. 'Right?'

'I hope so.' she nodded.

'That doesn't fill me with much hope.' said Lara referring to her sisters hesitation.

'I...' sighed Liv. 'I mean, I think they'll be fine, like ninety eight percent sure.'

'If Derek stops being an ass.' said Imogen.

'He's not being an ass.' Liv shook her head.

'Erm, did you hear Meredith?! You said yourself he's an ass when he's pissy.'

'Language.' murmured Alison.

'Yeah he's an ass when he's pissy but he's not being an ass for not wanting to do it.'

'I didn't say he had to do it, I said he had to stop being an ass. He's not even listening to her.' Imogen frowned. 'Anyway, if they're not fine it's Derek's fault.'

'That's not fair.' frowned Liv. 'He has a right to not want to.'

'Okay, can you just tell us already?' said Lara. 'What does he not want to do?'

'Girls,' said Alison quickly. 'Obviously whatever it is is private and they don't want us to be discussing it. If it becomes any of our business I'm sure they will tell us.'

'Oh it will be your business.' said Imogen under her breath, granting a glare off Olivia. 'What?' she shrugged. 'It's not simple, Liv.'

'I know that.' she said quickly. 'And its not as simple as him just doing it either.'

'I know that.' Imogen mimicked.

'Okay you two need to stop,' Alison shook her head. 'Stop bickering and be a support system for both Meredith and your brother. No taking sides.'

'Imogen's already on Meredith's side.' Liv sighed.

'So were you five minutes ago!' Imogen gasped.

'I'm on both their sides.'

'Well you've changed your tune.' Imogen rolled her eyes.

'You just agreed it wasn't simple.'

'Yeah, so Derek should hear her out!'

'And he will.'

'Girls please.' Repeated Alison. 'Change the topic of conversation and finish your dessert.'

 _Thank you so much for reading! Please review X_


	14. Chapter 14

_Hi guys, thank you so much for reading! I really hope you like this update because I love it._

Meredith sighed as Mark pulled up outside their apartment building, next to Derek's car. She was dreading going inside and talking to him, it was like a cold war between them at his mother's house. But she knew the longer she stayed at Alison's, the harder it would be to leave. This conversation needed to happen, whether he hated her and it all blew up or not she couldn't live in this limbo. She'd started looking into Seattle and she could move into her mom's house pretty much straight away, and Richard would have her job there for her. The only thing she desperately would need to figure out was a car. She was rubbish with cars, Derek was always super into them and knew what to look for. He'd helped her decide on her last two cars and she honestly had no idea where to even begin. She could probably just buy any though, if it was only going to be for a year or so. Unless her mother decided to defy the odds and last another five.

She felt like she was in some weird limbo and she just needed to know where she stood with Derek. She would do anything she could to keep their marriage and would work as hard as she needed to. Derek was the love of her life, he had been ever since he had held her in bed the night after she'd had a fight with Addison Montgomery in freshman year, and she wasn't going to let things crumble now.

After saying goodbye to Mark, she headed up to their floor. She took a deep breath as she approached the door to their apartment, fighting with Derek was bad, but she needed to put her foot down. She was going and she needed to know what he was going to do, and what the change would mean for them as a couple. There was no one else she wanted to spend the rest of her life with and she was pretty sure if he ended things then she'd never find anyone else. He was it for her, and he always would be. She just needed him to see that. She wasn't choosing her mom over him, she just didn't need killing her mom to be another thing that happened to her. She needed to be in Seattle while her mom was in this state, and then she and Derek could resume their lives and their plan to have a family.

Silence greeted her as she pushed the door open, hanging her coat up and slipping off her shoes. He was obviously in their bedroom, even thought it was only seven thirty. She expected him to be watching a game on television or something, but instead he was in their room, the door shut.

'Hi,' she murmured, opening the door to see her husband propped up against the pillows, reading something on his tablet.

'Hi,' he looked up at her, before looking back at his screen.

She fumbled with her sleeves before deciding to join him on the bed. She was kind of expecting him to ignore her or pick a fight so his reaction, although not great wasn't that bad either.

'What you reading?' she asked softly, scooting closer to him but careful not to touch him.

'Nothing interesting.'

'Oh.'

'Just last month's New England Med journal.'

'Oh. I read it the other day, it wasn't as good as normal.'

'No.' he agreed, and she was pretty proud of herself for managing to keep things calm so far.

'The neuro article was Marriot revisited though.'

'Oh, yeah.' she breathed, unable to keep herself from smiling. 'It was. I noticed that too.' Her heart squeezing at his reference to one of the people who probably played one of the biggest roles in their relationship. Who knows, if his research hadn't been so damn complicated, she probably never would have asked Derek for help the day they met in the library.

'That was good.'

'Yeah.' she breathed, smiling sadly. She and her husband were in a really bad place right now, but they had so many amazing memories and a story most people wouldn't believe. It was rare to find your soulmate when you're nineteen, but she was lucky enough to have had him by her side ever since. 'I love you, Derek.' she said quietly, easing her head onto his shoulder, noting how he didn't flinch.

'I love you too.' he breathed, however still unmoving his attention from the tablet.

'I'm sorry you had to leave dinner.'

'Hmmmm. Me too.'

'I... I didn't want to tell them. I didn't want them to get involved.'

'So you did tell them?' he asked, a sharper edge to his voice.

'Well yeah,' she said quickly. 'Not at first. I only told them when they came upstairs. They were pretty insistent.'

'Of course they were.' He said, even sharper.

'They only meant well.'

'It's none of their business.'

'They're your sisters Derek.'

'Yeah I know that.' he snapped, and she could swear she felt him move slightly trying to get away from her.

'They just wanted to make sure we were both okay, everyone noticed something was off with us.'

'Yeah and did you tell them why?' he asked, turning toward her, raising his eyebrows and forcing her to move her head off his shoulder.

'I told you I told them.'

'Told them that you're upping and leaving.'

'Derek it's not like that.' she shook her head, fighting back the tears that were already stinging their eyes.

'We planned our lives in New York, Meredith. Not to suddenly move to Seattle.'

'I know that!' she said exasperated. 'I don't know why you think I'm enjoying this. This is hell for me too you know!'

'Oh yeah, you're not being forced to move your whole life and cancel all your plans for a woman who hates you.'

'Yes I am!' she shouted. 'Maybe I don't have someone telling me to do it but my mom's condition is forcing me into this. She hates me too you know. She hates me because I'm apparently weak. Loving _you_ apparently makes me weak but I don't care. I never cared, Derek I always chose you. I wanted you and I still do. So don't you dare say I'm choosing her over you because that's really unfair.'

'Oh wow I'm so grateful.' he rolled his eyes. 'Who knew treating you well would be thrown back in my face, maybe I shouldn't have bothered and you and mommy could live happily ever after.'

'Stop!' she shouted, and she could feel her voice threatening to break. He was being really unfair, and while she understood he was upset he was being really, really unfair right now.

'So what, we move out there and just wait for her to die? It's fucking pointless Meredith.'

'We move out there in case she needs us!'

'She's never been there when you needed her!'

'So that means I should stoop to her level? I thought you loved me because I was kind and a good person?!'

'Oh fuck off.' he snapped, sitting up on the bed and facing away from her.

'Don't you tell me to fuck off you fucking ass.' she hissed.

'I said fuck off, Meredith! I don't want to move!'

'Fine. Then don't.' She shouted louder. 'You stay here, I'll go.'

'Fine.' he sighed, standing up and beginning to pace on the opposite side of their bed.

'But if I go I need to know what that means for us.'

'What?' he frowned.

'What does this mean for us, Derek?' she pleaded, her eyes burning into his.

'What do you mean what does this mean?' he spat.

'If I go, what happens to us? Are you going to leave me?' she needed to know outright if this was going to be the end of her and her husband. Although it would probably break her it would be a damn sight better to know now than have him dump her by phone while she was across the country.

'I don't know.' he sighed.

'Oh.' she wasn't expecting that. She thought she had prepared herself for his worst answer possible but apparently she hadn't. She felt like her heart was breaking in her chest and she was pretty sure as soon as she opened her mouth to speak again tears would flood her face.

'I mean you tell me what this means for us.' He challenged, his hands on his hips. He looked really good in his jeans and sweater, it was one of her favourite sweaters on him it made his body look really good. 'You move to Seattle for god knows how long, we both have busy jobs with not a lot of potential to fly across the country to see each other. We have to fund two separate households, how are any of these things a good basis of a good marriage?'

'But that's not the basis of our marriage!' she shouted, tears rolling down her cheeks as predicted. 'The basis of our marriage is love, Derek. And acceptance and support. I love you so much and would support you to the ends of the earth, and you know that. You know _that_ , Derek. The next twelve months? I'm not saying they're going to be easy, but it wont be impossible. They're bumps in the road. Road works, temporary. I'll do anything I can to make it work.'

'Except stay.' he laughed harshly.

'Except stay.' she agreed. 'But you don't know if you're going to leave me.' she nodded, wiping her eyes quickly. 'That's good to know.'

'Hmmmm.' he breathed coldly.

'You're willing to throw everything away because I'm trying to do the right thing.'

'Don't make me out to be the bad guy.' he spat.

'Well that's what you are right now, Derek. Even Liv agreed that-'

'Oh yes, please do tell me what Liv said, I forgot she was the third wheel in our marriage. Let Liv dictate our lives.'

'She said you're an ass and she's right.'

'I have an idea.' he suddenly grinned, his whole expression fake. 'Why don't you move out there with Liv? If she's sooo great.'

'Fuck off.' she shook her head, unable to stop crying. 'You're a fucking ass, you know that.'

'Yeah go on, go have a cry.' he shouted with a harsh laugh lacing his tone, after her as she moved toward their bedroom door, slamming it on her way out and falling onto the couch. He was mocking her. Her husband was mocking her and laughing at her for being upset. He had never done that. In the whole nine years she had known him he had never ever ever laughed at her as she cried. He was the only person she turned to when she was upset, when she needed to let out her emotions.

He held her and reassured her it was going to be okay, that they would figure whatever it is out together. He was being an ass. Her whole world had been turned upside down by her mom's diagnosis and just when she needed her husband most was when he was turning his back on her. She didnt want to move to Seattle. She didn't understand why he didn't get that she would stay in New York if she could. This was a really crappy situation too, and the thought of Derek actually leaving her made her feel sick.

A sob escaped her lips as she thought about living in Seattle, alone. In her mom's house with no friends, working long hours with no husband to come home to and no husband to call or skype. No husband at all. Derek leaving her would give her no reason to even come back to New York, she'd have no one. His family would probably all hate her and she couldn't go back to Mount Sinai working with Derek everyday and not being with him. If she came back and he was seeing someone else, she didn't think she could cope.

Her mind was running away with her but she couldn't stop crying as she curled herself tighter into a ball, her whole life seemed to be falling apart and she couldn't stop it. Unless her mom dropped dead right now, she was moving to Seattle and if she was moving to Seattle then Derek was no longer committed to her. Or at least not fully committed anyway, not if he wasn't willing to give everything to make it work.

He had always been so invested in their relationship, so present. Sometimes she felt like he made more of an effort than she did. Which was why it didn't make sense that now he was willing to give everything up for something she couldn't control.

Her breathing became irregular as she gasped, trying desperately to wipe her eyes which were overflowing. Maybe she should have just stayed at Alison's for the night and given Derek a while to sleep on it. Going to work tomorrow was going to be hell. They had to leave the house at five thirty and she couldn't see herself getting any sleep. She wiped her eyes on her sleeve and grabbed a cushion to cry into as she laid on the couch. There was a blanket on the floor in front of her which she reached for and wrapped herself in as she continued to cry. It smelt like Derek. Or more, it smelt like her and Derek. Their home had a scent which wasn't strictly Derek and wasn't all her, it was a weird combination of them both and normally it comforted her. When Derek was still at work and she came home she would wrap herself in it as she watched TV or ate pizza and it would make her feel like he was almost their with her.

They bought it for their first apartment in Hanover and cuddled under it all the time. It was weird how something which normally brought her so much happiness was making her so sad. If moving to Seattle was the end of her and Derek, the blanket would be one of many things she would never see again. She couldn't keep such sentimental things with him across the country living his single life without her. Her hand flew in front of her mouth as she thought she was going to vomit. Single. The word made her feel nauseous. Not once in eight years had she been single. Not even for a day. She and Derek were supposed to be together forever, the days of either of them being single were supposedly long gone.

Her cheeks were heated, her whole face was heated even though her body was cold. She felt exhausted from crying but it was like she couldn't stop. There were tear stains on the grey cushion in front of her and she whimpered slightly as she heard she bedroom door open. She buried her face into it as she braced herself for whatever was about to come next.

He sighed. She heard him sigh and she waited for the next jibe to come at her for crying.

She flinched slightly as she felt a soft hand on her knee. 'Oh Mer,' cam her husbands soft voice. 'Come here.'

She couldn't help but cry as she remained still. Derek was knelt in front of her, she could sense him. He reached his fingers through her hair gently and moved his hand from her knee to her back rubbing gently. This was more the Derek she knew, always the first to comfort her. Except he wasn't normally the one to make her feel like this.

'Shhhh,' he soothed. 'It's okay. It's okay. Just breathe. It's okay. Don't cry.'

She sniffled as she opened her eyes which were now red and puffy. Her husband was indeed knelt in front of her, a pained look in his eyes which looked like they'd also been crying- or were about to. 'It's okay.' he repeated, his voice like velvet.

'Hmmmm.' she whimpered, holding the blanket close to her.

'I love you.' he said firmly, leaning forward slowly, as if he was treading carefully waiting for her to reject him, and kissed her cheek softly. She was sure he would be able to taste her salty tears. 'And I'm sorry. I... I'm an ass.' he sighed. 'I'm an ass and you have every right to hate me.'

'I don't hate you.' she whispered almost inaudibly.

'Can I carry you to bed? And we can talk?'

'I don't want to.' she shook her head profusely, more tears falling. 'I can't fight any more, Derek. I can't.'

'I don't want to fight.' he said simply. 'I hate fighting with you.'

'I hate fighting with you too.' she whispered.

'Hmmmm,' he breathed, stroking her cheek softly with the back of his fingers. 'Let me take you to bed, and we can figure this out.'

'I'm exhausted.'

'I know.' he murmured. 'And I'm sorry for that, it's my fault.'

'Yeah.' she whispered.

'Please, Mer. I don't want to spend another day or night fighting with you.' he pleaded, his eyes an intense blue. They were such a gorgeous colour, and he always had such a sparkle in them, but right now they were intense. They looked lost and sad and they broke her heart.

'I...' she took a shaky breath. 'I can't Derek.'

'Please.' he begged, a tear falling down his right cheek. 'Please Mer.'

'I can't.' she repeated, shaking her head. 'I can't lie in bed with you while you tell me this is the end for us.'

'Oh Mer I'm not going to say that.' he breathed, still rubbing her back. 'I'm not... this isn't going to break us.'

'You're not?' she breathed, her eyes going wide as she felt her breath catch in her throat.

'No,' he shook his head. 'I've been angry...and upset. And I've taken that out on you instead of talking to you and communicating with you how I'm feeling.'

'I know,' she whispered, reaching for his hand and entwining their fingers. 'You can always talk to me, you know that.'

'I know.' he nodded. 'I'm sorry.'

'Hmmm.' she breathed, squeezing his hand gently. 'So you're not going to dump me?'

'God no.' he said firmly. 'You're the love of my life.'

'I love you.'

'I love you too.' he murmured. 'I hate myself for making you cry. I... I hate seeing you so upset and I hate myself even more for knowing it's my fault.'

'It's okay.'

'No, it's not.'

'I know.' she breathed. 'But I forgive you.'

'Thank you.' he whispered. 'Am I okay to pick you up?'

She simply nodded, sitting up slightly as she kept the blanket around her and she felt his strong arms surround her. He always felt so safe when he had his arms around her and she relaxed into him immediately, nuzzling his neck as he carried her effortlessly into their bedroom.

'Do you want to change?' he murmured softly into her ear, still cradling her in his arms.

'Yeah.' she whispered. 'Can I borrow a sweater?'

'Of course.' he breathed, kissing the top of her head softly before lowering her gently to the ground. 'How's my Florida one?' he asked.

'Yes please.' she nodded, taking off her jeans and underwear before reaching for some sweat pants.

'There you go.' he said, placing the college sweater his sister had bought for him in her sophomore year on Meredith's side of the bed.

'Thanks.' she whispered, pulling her sweater over her head and replacing it with her husband's after unhooking her bra. She slid underneath the covers as Derek pulled his sweater off, joining her with a bare chest. He was so chiselled and defined and she wondered what she ever did to deserve such an amazing gorgeous perfect husband. She had never felt good enough for anyone in her life and here she was married to the world's most perfect man.

'Come here,' he breathed, pulling her into his arms and she immediately rested her cheek against the bare skin of his chest, relishing in his warmth, not just physically.

'So,' she whispered, as he reached for her hand.

'So.'

'I love you.'

'I love you too.'

'And I know you think I don't have to do this but I would never forgive myself if I didn't. Killing my mother can't be another thing that happens to me. I wouldn't put us under this much strain for nothing.'

'I know.' he breathed. 'I'd do the same for my mom. Any of my sisters would.'

'I know. But... I understand my mom isn't a good person in our story.'

'No.' he agreed. 'But she's still your mom.'

'Even if I wish she wasn't.'

'I'm sorry, I know how hard this whole thing has been on you and I've made it a thousand times harder.'

'I did kinda blindside you.' she admitted. 'I shouldn't have just dropped it on you the night before we were supposed to leave.'

'A little more warning would have been nice.' he nodded.

'So I'm sorry. I didn't handle that very well.'

'It's okay.' he breathed. 'You were upset. And I didn't handle any of it well.'

'We were both wrong.' she murmured.

'Hmmmm.'

'I... so what now?' she asked. 'We can put all the fighting behind us... we both said things we shouldn't... and we're both sorry. But what happens now?'

'What do you want to happen now?' he asked, his hand trailing down her back soothingly.

'I... I know what I don't want to happen.' she said weakly.

'And that is?'

'For us to separate. Divorce.'

'That's not happening. Ever.' he said firmly. 'We're together, forever. Me and you okay?'

'Hmmm.' she breathed happily, not wanting to start crying again. She ran her fingertips across his abdomen gently. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.' he echoed, squeezing her hand and placing another kiss on top of her head. 'Do you want me to come with you?'

'What?' she asked, her head snapping up from his chest to meet his gaze.

'Do you want me to come to Seattle with you?' he asked again. 'Is that what you want? Rather than me stay here while you go?'

'Of... of course I'd rather you come with me.' she said quietly. 'I don't want to be apart from you. But you don't have to.' she added quickly.

'I'll go.' he nodded.

'Derek,' she shook her head but was silenced as he placed a finger to her lips.

'I'll go.' he repeated. 'I love you. And we'll be okay. It's not what we planned... but it will be an adventure.'

'Are you...' she almost gasped. 'You're serious?'

'Of course I'm serious.' he nodded. 'I wouldn't fuck you around about this, Mer.'

'You... you...' she breathed, tears stinging her eyes again. 'You'll come with me?'

'I'll go with you.' he nodded. 'It's not forever.'

'It's not.' she agreed, wiping her eyes quickly as a wide grin spread across her face.

'Ah, there's that beautiful smile.' he said, smiling himself.

'I love you.' she almost cried, wrapping her arms around his neck as she launched herself at him. 'I love you. I love you, I love you.'

'I love you too.' he replied, his strong hands hugging her closer to him. 'And I'm sorry it's taken me so long to be the supporting husband you deserve.'

'You are the supportive husband I deserve.' she breathed, pulling back from him slightly.

'Can I kiss you?' he asked quietly, his eyes captivating hers.

'I...' he almost took her breath away. Never had he asked to kiss her, he always just did it. There was something about it which gave her butterflies, and she nodded quickly, running her hand through his hair that she loved so much.

'Hmmmm.' he breathed, leaning towards her slowly, his face nearing hers. She gasped as his lips came close enough to hers to touch, his soft kiss melting her there and then. And it was soft. It was soft and it was slow but it was passionate and she wrapped her arms around his neck as he continued to make love to her mouth. She didn't quite know how they'd gone from screaming at each other to kissing and cuddling in a way that made her feel like she was in heaven, but she wasn't complaining.

'Wow.' she whispered as he finally pulled away from her.

'I love you.' he whispered, kissing her lightly again.

'I love you so much.'

'And we'll figure this out. Tomorrow after work we'll sort everything out and we'll be out there as fast as we can.'

'I don't...' she shook her head. 'Are you sure?'

'I'm a thousand percent sure.' he smiled softly at her.

'But this... New York, it's your home.'

'No,' he shook his head, cupping her cheek gently. 'You, are my home.'

 _Thank you so much for reading! Please review X_


	15. Chapter 15

_Hi guys I know it has literally been MONTHS since I updated this and I'm so sorry. I've just had so much going on with school and exams and stuff that I haven't had time to finish this chapter. It was harder to finish as time went on because I started it so long ago, but It's finally finished and I promise the next update will be better and won't take as long! Please leave me a review if you can I would really appreciate it!_

Meredith grinned as she left the Chief's office, she and Derek had discussed their plan the previous night after he had held her and cuddled her in bed. The whole thing seemed like a blur, less than twenty four hours ago they were still at war, and here they were now all loved up like normal. He had been very apologetic, but she had come to realise that all she had really need to give him was a bit of time.

She sprung such a huge thing on him and expected him to be totally fine with it, now they'd spoken about it calmly she can't believe she actually would think Derek would leave her. He had a temper and she knew that. He'd been her best friend for nine years and his temper was probably his worst trait. He had been angry and upset that her mom's condition was tearing them apart form his family, and that it was out of his control.

He'd been an ass, there was no doubting that, but she had blindsided him and now he had come to terms with things he was actually being incredibly supportive. They were going to move into her mom's house and put all their belongings from their apartment in storage. They fully intended on returning to New York as soon as possible, and so it made no sense to sell all their furniture when they would just need to repurchase it all again later. However, they were selling their cars, and had agreed to just buy one in Seattle. If it became impossible to share, they would figure out a second, but it was a pretty practical idea considering they were both going to be at the hospital most of the time.

She'd just spoken to the Chief and secured them a transfer back from Seattle whenever they were finished at Grace. It was actually a lot easier than Derek had thought it would be- Dr. Harvey was keen to keep her since learning of her mother's identity, and Derek was the most promising intern in their class. And so he was enthusiastic about welcoming them back once her mom had passed away, which was not a common thing in the surgical world. He'd called Richard there and then and confirmed their places to start work there in exactly a week's time.

They only had two more days left at Sinai and then they would finish. Their flights to Seattle were in four days which gave them some time to settle in to her mom's old home and get a car sorted. It was going to be a hectic week, but they'd cleared things with their landlord that morning, and had the storage people coming to take their stuff away the day before they flew. And so they'd have to check in to a hotel the night before they flew out, but that didn't bother her. It might actually make things more special, she didn't think her and Derek had ever been to a hotel and not had sex.

The biggest thing they had to do in the next four days was break the news to Alison and the rest of Derek's family. She wasn't sure how they were going to take it- especially Alison. She'd become closer to her mother in law in the last nine years she'd known Derek than she had her own mother her entire life, and the thought of her not being twenty minutes away from them was really sad. Not to mention moving away from Imogen, Lara and Claire, and even further away from Liv. No doubt Imogen and Liv would be supportive but it didn't mean moving so far away from them would be easy.

She also knew leaving Jack was something really hard for Derek. She loved her nephew, she really did. But watching his nephew grow up meant a lot to Derek and so she knew missing so much while Jack was still so young was really rough on him. But hopefully they would be home by the time Lara had another baby, and by then maybe they would even be ready to have their own.

'Hey,' came her husband's voice from around the corner of the corridor as he walked toward her, holding a chart.

'Hey you.' she grinned. 'I just spoke to Harvey and its all cleared.'

'Really?'

'Yeah,' she nodded. 'It was a lot easier than I expected.'

'Oh that's good.' he said with a grin.

'Yeah.' she breathed. 'Look, do you think we should tell your mom tonight? I know we don't finish until eight but I think we should tell her sooner rather than later, don't you think?' she asked, biting her lip slightly in anticipation.

'Yeah.' he sighed, the grin she loved so much immediately fading. 'I'm kind of dreading it.'

'Me too.' she admitted. 'But we have to do it soon and the longer we put it off the worse it will be.'

'I know.' he agreed. 'I'll call her at lunch and see if we could go round on our way home?'

'I think that's a good idea.' she said as they stepped into the elevator.

'I just don't know what we're going to do about the sisters... I mean, we leave so soon and there's no way we're going to see Liv before we go. And there's no guarantee to see the other three in the next few days.'

'I know.' she murmured.

'I'll probably have to call them all tonight after we've told mom.' he sighed sadly, as she reached for his hand and squeezed.

'I'm sorry this is so hard.' she whispered.

'It isn't your fault.' he murmured, attempting to smile at her.

'I really appreciate it. And it's not forever.'

'It's not. But we are.'

'We are.' she smiled softly as the elevator dinged, and she removed her hand from his grasp. 'Tell me what she says when you call.' she said as they stepped out.

'I will.' he nodded. 'I have to go hand this to the lab but I'll see you later okay?'

'Okay.' she smiled as he turned and walked down the corridor and headed to the lab office.

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Her heart was racing as Derek pulled up outside Alison's house. She'd been delighted at them stopping over for dinner, but Derek said she had seemed concerned when he told her their news couldn't wait until family dinner. Truth be told, she was completely dreading telling her. She knew Alison was bound to be supportive, her mother in law had never been anything less. But to tell her that she was taking her son to the other side of the country and not knowing when she'd be bringing him back.

'Is that Lara's car?' she frowned.

'Looks like it.' Derek nodded.

'Well what's she doing here?' she asked a little snappier than she intended.

'I don't know.' he laughed, leaning to kiss her cheek softly. 'Now come on, lets go. I'm hungry.'

'Kay.' she sighed, stepping out of the passenger side of Derek's car.

'It's going to be okay.' he smiled, taking her hand in his and giving it the gentle squeeze that always provided her with comfort. 'Ma?' he called, opening the front door and leading Meredith inside.

'Oh Derek,' Alison smiled as the two of them walked into the living room to see Lara sat on the sofa holding Jack, and Claire sat in the arm chair.

'Hey.' he smiled. 'We weren't expecting you guys to be here.' he smiled at his sisters.

'Oh Lara's just come to pick up Jack and Claire bobbed in after work.' Alison explained. 'Hello Meredith dear.'

'Hey.' Meredith smiled, leaning to kiss her mother in law on the cheek.

'What can I get you both to drink?'

'I'll just have water please.' Said Derek, sitting next to Lara on the couch and taking his nephew off her.

'And for you Meredith dear? A lemonade or would you prefer a glass of wine?'

'A wine would be great if you have some.' Meredith smiled, sitting on the other couch near Claire.

'No problem, dinner is still cooking.'

'Okay.' Meredith smiled. 'Thank you.'

'Girls do you want to stay for dinner too?' asked Alison, causing Meredith to shoot a panicked look at Derek. She was nervous enough as it was, let alone breaking the news to his two eldest sisters as well.

'It's fine.' he mouthed as he rocked Jack in his arms.

'Could I?' Lara's eyes lit up.

'Yes of course sweetheart.' Alison smiled.

'I'll text Joe and tell him to order a take out or something.'

'Does he want to come too?'

'No he'll be more than happy ordering in,' said Lara. 'He's been exhausted with work this week.'

'What about you Claire?'

'I wouldn't say no.' Claire smiled, her eyes hopeful.

'No problem.'

'So how come you guys are here?' asked Lara, putting her phone away.

'Oh...' breathed Meredith, glancing at Derek. 'We um...'

'We needed to speak to mom about something.' he nodded.

'And... are we going to address the elephant in the room?' asked Claire, raising her eyebrows.

'Elephant?' frowned Derek.

'You two.' supplied Lara. 'After dinner on Sunday it seemed like world war three was about to kick off. And now you're not sat on top of each other like you normally are.'

'I'm holding my nephew.' laughed Derek, kissing Jack quickly. 'But we do need some cuddles with Auntie Meredith don't we baba?' he cooed, laughing slightly.

'So you guys are fine now?' clarified Claire as Derek stood up to sit next to Meredith on the other couch.

'Completely and totally.' he nodded, handing Jack over to her and kissing her cheek.

'Yeah.' Meredith agreed, despite being nervous not being able to grin at her husband who leaned in to kiss her softly as Alison came back in with their drinks.

'Well, this is a lovely and unexpected evening.' she smiled, placing Meredith's glass of wine on the side as she held Jack. 'Jack will be happy now, with his favourite Uncle.'

'Don't tell Mark that.' Laughed Lara.

'He already knows.' Derek winked. 'It's obvious.'

'And we all know Meredith's his favourite Aunt even though she's the only one not related by blood.' Claire laughed.

'He can't help who he likes.' Meredith giggled, bouncing Jack in her lap.

'Well I for one am happy to see the two of you back to normal.' Alison smiled.

'Yeah.' said Meredith, glancing up at Derek awkwardly.

'Me too.' he smiled. 'Erm, Mer can I borrow you for a second?' he asked.

'Um... sure.' she frowned.

'Thanks. Sorry guys won't be a second.' he breathed, taking Jack from Meredith's arms. 'Ma?' he asked, nodding to Jack.

'Oh, yes please.' she grinned. 'Come and give grandma a cuddle little man.'

'They're definitely back to normal,' laughed Lara. 'Sneaking off together.'

'We aren't sneaking.' Derek frowned at his sister, reaching for Meredith's hand. 'We just need a second.'

'To make out.' laughed Claire.

'No.' Derek frowned.

'Claire.' Alison shook her head.

'We just weren't expecting you guys to be here, that's all.' he said.

'What's that supposed to mean?' asked Claire.

'We just need a second, okay?'

'Okay dear.' said Alison. 'You two take a minute.'

'Thanks.' Derek smiled as he pulled Meredith outside into the hallway. 'What do you want to do?'

'What do you mean?' she asked, chewing her lip as she looked up at him with big eyes.

'My sisters,' he sighed. 'I... how are we supposed to tell mom with them here?'

'I don't know.' Meredith admitted, squeezing his hand.

'I... I wouldn't mind telling them tonight too but I do think we should tell mom first.'

'I agree.' she nodded. 'But we can't pull her out with us so what are we supposed to do?'

Derek paused in thought for a moment. 'Maybe we could tell her after dinner, when they leave?' he suggested.

'That could work.' Meredith nodded. 'But then we missed an opportunity to tell your sisters, especially because its unlikely we can get all three of them together before we leave anyway.'

'I know.' Derek sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose with his spare hand.

'Erm...' Meredith breathed, trying to think, just as the front door opened behind them.

'Oh hello you two.' said Imogen, coming through the door holding a cardboard box.

'Hi Im.' Meredith breathed, turning around. 'What are you doing here?'

'I had some stuff to give back to mom.' she shrugged. 'I could say the same for you. Looks like you're all loved up again anyway.' she smirked, nodding at their joined hands.

'We're here for dinner.' said Derek. 'Lara and Claire are here too.'

'What?' Imogen frowned. 'And I wasn't invited?'

'I think we were the only ones technically invited.' Derek replied. 'But now they're staying too.'

'There better be enough for me.' she frowned, moving past them and going into the living room.

'Great.' he sighed. 'Just what we need.'

'It might be a good thing...' Meredith said nervously. 'We're going to have to tell them.'

'I know.' he sighed. 'So should we just tell them all together? At the dinner table?'

'It might be best.' she shrugged.

'You're right.' he nodded. 'Man I wish this wasn't so hard.'

'Sorry.' she whispered.

'Not your fault.' he reminded her, pulling her in for a quick hug and kissing her forehead softly. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.' she breathed, grasping on to her husband. 'Okay. Can you lead?' she asked, looking up at him.

'Us back into the room?' he laughed.

'No, the conversation at dinner.' she laughed.

'Of course.' he smiled, kissing her on the cheek quickly before going back into the living room.

'Oh there you are.' said Alison, who was sat on the arm of the arm chair where Imogen was sat. 'Your sister is going to stay for dinner now too, and it will be ready soon so you can all sit at the table and I'll go and finish it.'

'Okay Ma.' smiled Derek.

'Back I see.' Claire smirked.

'Oh yeah I see they're all lovey dovey again.' said Imogen.

'Anyway, you're staying for dinner?' asked Derek, looking at Imogen as the girls stood up to make their way to the dining table.

'Yup.' she nodded. 'No way am I cooking if everyone else is getting Ma's food.'

'Good logic.' Meredith giggled.

'You okay?' asked Imogen as Derek and his other sisters walked ahead into the dining room.

'Yeah.' Meredith nodded, grateful for her friend's concern.

'Have you decided what you guys are gonna do?'

'Uh-huh.' Meredith nodded, unable to say much more without getting upset.

'You're going aren't you?' Imogen asked sadly.

'Yeah.' she whispered.

'Oh Mer...' breathed Imogen. 'I'm gonna miss you so much.'

'Me too.' she nodded.

'But I know it's important for you guys to go.'

'Yeah.' Meredith sighed.

'Have you told mom yet?' asked Imogen.

'What are you two whispering about?' called Lara. 'Get in here!'

'Coming!' yelled Imogen, rolling her eyes at Meredith.

'No.' Breathed Meredith. 'That's why we're here.'

'Shit and now everyone's here.'

'Exactly.'

'Fuck. So... what are you gonna do?'

'Tell people at dinner I guess.' Meredith shrugged. 'There's no other way.'

'Man.'

'So back up would be nice?' she smiled.

'Of course.' Imogen nodded, pulling Meredith into a hug as Alison came into the hallway holding some hot plates.

'Oh girls I'm bringing dinner out now, do go and sit down.'

'We are, Ma.' Imogen nodded, following her mom and Meredith into the dining room.

'Hey,' breathed Derek as Meredith slipped in next to him and kissed him on the cheek.

'Hey.' she smiled.

'You okay?'

'Yeah.' she breathed, smiling at his soft expression. 'Just talking to Im.'

'She knows?' he whispered.

'Yeah.' she nodded. 'She's supportive though.'

'Good.' he breathed, kissing her on the forehead.

'Oi, lovebirds, please detach while I'm eating.' said Claire as Alison finally sat down at the table.

'Thanks Mom.' said Derek, gesturing to his chicken in front of him.

'Oh, you're welcome dear.'

'Thank you Alison.'

'No problem Meredith.'

'So what did you mean about not expecting us to be here?' asked Claire, raising her eyebrows.

'Oh,' breathed Meredith, glancing at Derek, nodding.

'We, actually came to talk to mom about something.' he explained before clearing his throat.

'I am sorry things got a bit out of hand sweetheart.' said Alison. 'It's not urgent is it?'

'Kind of.' Derek winced.

'Oh my god you're pregnant!' Claire exclaimed.

'What?! No!' Derek frowned.

'Oh my god, you are aren't you?' asked Lara.

'No. Definitely not.' Meredith shook her head.

'Oh.' Said Claire, deflated.

'But seeing as you guys are all here, looks like we're gonna have to break the news to you guys too.' he laughed weakly, resting his hand on Meredith's thigh.

'Is this something to do with your guys' fight the other day?' frowned Lara.

'Kinda, yeah.' Meredith sighed.

'Well tell us I'm getting worried.' Said Claire.

'Claire,' frowned Alison. 'In their own time.'

'We're moving to Seattle.' Derek blurted.

Meredith's eyes widened at Derek's bluntness. The whole table went silent, even Imogen didn't know what to say as her sisters didn't breathe a word.

'What?' asked Alison, her eyes suddenly looking glassy.

'I...' Derek glanced at Meredith who reached for his hand which was resting on her leg reassuringly.

'We're moving to Seattle for a couple of years...' she continued for him. 'I... my mom needs me over there. Her Alzheimer is really bad and being a six hour plane ride away isn't exactly ideal. We've sorted out a transfer to the Seattle Grace program, and also are able to transfer back to Mount Sinai whenever we want. We're gonna live in my mom's old house so all we have to really sort out is a car. And we're going to facetime you guys and call all the time. And Derek can come back when he has a couple of days off. And we'll visit whenever we get a vacation or holidays, we-'

'Wait, so you guys are moving to Seattle?' Frowned Lara. 'For your mom? Who you hate.'

'I don't hate her.' Meredith sighed.

'Fine, who hates Derek then.' Lara raised her eyebrow.

'Whether she hates Derek or not, she's dying Lara.' Jumped in Imogen. 'They probably won't be there for that long, and you'd do the same if it was mom.'

'Except mom isn't rude to my husband.'

'Mom is here you know.' Said Alison. 'I can't believe it.' she turned to Derek and Meredith. 'Is there no way you can bring your mother out here, Mereith?'

'We've already looked into that.' Said Derek, shaking his head. 'It's not going to work.'

'Why?' frowned Claire.

'Because it's not.' snapped Derek.

'So you're just going to live across the country from your whole family?'

'Temporarily.' he corrected her. 'I don't get what the big deal is. It's not going to be forever. Mer needs to support her mom and we need to support her. If us not being around for a year or two is what that takes then so be it. Liv doesn't live here.'

'Liv lives an hour away.' Said Lara. 'It's not the same.'

'It's none of our business, let them get on with it.' Imogen rolled her eyes. 'He's our brother and we should be supporting him, not being mad at him.'

'I'm not mad.' said Lara defensively.

'I am.' said Claire.

'Of course you would be.' snapped Imogen.

'Girls please!' said Alison. 'Oh Derek, I'm going to miss you both so much.'

'Me too Ma.'

'But I understand it's what the two of you need to do, and Meredith dear you know all I want is for you to be happy. And if being near your mom will give you that then of course you need to go.'

'Thanks Alison.' she smiled, thankful someone else was on their side.

'And I could maybe fly out soon to visit you? Help you get settled?'

'That would be lovely Mom.' Derek smiled. 'I'd love that.'

'Me too.' grinned Meredith.

'So, tell us about this program. Is it good?' she asked, tucking into her dinner.

'Great,' nodded Meredith. 'It's actually better than the one at Sinai.'

'Really?' Alison grinned.

'Second in the country.' Derek nodded. 'So it should be good.'

'That's so cool.' Smiled Imogen. 'I'm glad you guys got things sorted.'

'Wait- you knew!' said Claire. 'You knew this is what they were fighting about and you didn't say anything? You knew they were moving?'

'I did not know they were moving.' Scoffed Imogen. 'I knew they were fighting about moving.'

'Same thing.' said Lara.

'Not really.' Imogen rolled her eyes, shoving some food in her mouth. 'Be happy for them and get over it.'

'I promise it's not forever guys.' said Derek, squeezing Meredith's hand. 'And if we didn't have to go then we wouldn't. But it's just something we have to do. It will just be like when we were at college.' he shrugged, smiling at Meredith.

'Except you won't be home for summer or the holidays.' Pointed out Claire.

'I know it isn't ideal, but its whats happening.' said Derek firmly. 'We're not asking for your permission, we're just telling you what's going on. Okay?'

'Hmmmm.' Lara sighed.

'Well I think it will be an adventure for the two of you, even if we'll miss you very much.' Alison smiled warmly. 'When are you thinking of going?'

'Oh... that's the other thing...' he murmured. 'We're going in a few days.'

'A few days?!' blurted Imogen. 'Sorry. Sorry. I'm being supportive. Just shocked at the timeline that's all.' she tried to say casually.

'So when were you gonna tell us if you're going so soon?' frowned Lara.

'We didn't know.' Derek sighed. 'But we thought we should have told mom before you guys, and we need to call Liv too.'

'Now Jack has two aunts and uncles living away.' Claire nodded at Lara.

'Shut up.' said Imogen.

'What?' Claire shrugged. 'It's true.'

'Stop trying to guilt trip him. They're going, they'll be back end of.'

'Thanks Im.' Meredith smiled.

'No probs.' she grinned. 'Can I come visit?'

'of course.'

'But we're probably going to be working a lot,' said Derek. 'We already have a lot of hours to catch up on.'

'That's fine.' Imogen shrugged. 'I've always wanted to go to Seattle anyway.'

'And we have a spare room.' Derek nodded.

'More than one.' Meredith smiled. 'If you and Mom wanna come together?'

'Oh that sounds lovely.' Alison nodded.

'That's a plan.' Imogen smiled. 'Maybe you guys could come too if you get your head out of your asses.' she turned to her sisters, to which they scowled.

'Hmmm.' breathed Claire.

'Maybe.' said Lara.

'Anyway, just let us know.' Smiled Derek. 'Everyone is always welcome.'

'Always.' Nodded Meredith, smiling at Derek. 'Thank you.' she mouthed as Alison changed the conversation.

'Love you.' he said quietly, kissing her quickly before eating his dinner.

'Love you too.'

'Should I call Liv when we get home?'

'Yeah,' she nodded. 'Put her on speaker and we'll tell her together.'

'Okay.' he grinned.

'Okay.' she breathed as her smile mirrored his own.

It hadn't gone perfectly, but Meredith figured telling Derek's family had gone pretty well. Alison took it well and it was nice having Imogen there too. Claire and Lara hadn't taken it well but hopefully they would come round in a couple of days. At least it meant they could get on with the rest of the move and be in Seattle in less than a week. It was weird, she was kind of excited for it now. Moving across the country with her husband was scary but at the same time she was looking forward to their new little life just the two of them.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


	16. Chapter 16

_Hi guys! Once again a very delayed update but I'm kinda hoping that you'll forgive me if I give you some sexy Merder. So here you go, I hope you enjoy thank you so much for reading! Please review X_

'Is that the last box?' Meredith asked over her shoulder as her husband carried another box into her mother's house.

'Yeah.' he smiled, placing it on top of another one.

'Good.' she murmured as she carried on taking their clothes out of one of their cases. They'd managed to put most of their stuff in storage in New York, and had fit all of their stuff in a couple of cases and about four boxes. They didn't need any urgent furniture as her mom's stuff had pretty much everything they needed.

'It smells a little funky.' Derek wrinkled up his nose.

'I know.' she sighed, handing him some clothes. 'Can you take these upstairs and put them in the wardrobe please?' she asked.

'Of course.' he nodded, taking them from her. 'Only if you give me a kiss first.' he smirked.

'You're ridiculous.' she laughed, leaning to kiss him softly.

'I love you.'

'I love you too.' she breathed. 'But I'll love you even more once you've taken those up.'

'Right.' he nodded. 'On my way.'

'And then there'll be some more for you when you come back down.'

'You do know that we just had a six hour flight, right?' he laughed as he headed out of the room.

'I know.' she agreed. 'Once we've put the basics away like clothes and stuff we'll have a rest and get take out or something.'

'Sounds good.' he agreed, disappearing up the stairs.

She smiled after him as he headed up. They only had tomorrow off before they started at Seattle Grace, and so it made sense to unpack a bit of stuff today so that they could spend the day together tomorrow. Their schedules would be even more grueling than in New York and so she wouldn't be seeing much of Derek when they started. Although they'd had a rocky road getting there, they were finally in Seattle and about to carry on their internship.

Chief Webber had agreed to take them on as long as they made up extra hours, which would mean practically living at the hospital. Luckily they'd managed to rent a car from the airport for a week while they figured another one out and with them both being at the hospital so much it shouldn't matter that they didn't have one each. Her mother did actually have a car that was sat on the driveway so hopefully Meredith could put them on the insurance or something.

It felt weird being in Seattle with Derek. She loved their life in New York. Their apartment, their jobs, and more importantly his family. That was one thing she was really going to miss. But at the same time, she kind of loved being on her own with Derek. Like it was them against the world. It would be like college where they were alone most of the time and then when they got to visit home it was special.

She placed the other pile of clothes on the couch just as Derek came back in the room.

'These for going up to?' he asked, coming up behind her and kissing her cheek as his hands rested on her hips.

'Yes please.' she murmured, leaning back into him for just a moment. 'Are you tired?'

'Yeah.' he sighed, kissing her cheek again.

'We can just have a lazy day tomorrow.' she promised. 'Before I lose you to the hospital.'

'And I lose you.' he breathed in her ear, sending a slight shiver up her spine.

'Exactly. So we need to unpack.'

'Unpacking.' he nodded.

'So take those clothes upstairs, and then you can take the underwear.'

'Oh great.' he said sarcastically, kissing her on the cheek a third and final time before pulling away from her and picking up the clothes.

'Including my sexy underwear which you might get treated to tomorrow.' she winked at him, pulling stuff out of the other case.

'Interesting.' his eyes immediately widened. 'Then I guess it won't be such a lazy day.'

'Stop it.' she giggled, throwing one of her mothers cushions at him.

'Hey you were the one who brought up your sexy underwear.' he pouted with an arm full of sweaters.

'Well if you're really lucky you'll get some sexy underwear tonight.'

'Really?' he raised his eyebrows.

'If you get everything unpacked.' she giggled.

'Challenge accepted.' he grinned, turning back up the stairs.

She grinned as she took out her toiletry bag from the case and set it down on the couch before reaching back in and pulling out the blanket which was underneath. Most people would probably think it was stupid bringing a blanket with you to the other side of the country, but they'd had this blanket for so long and it just reminded her of him. They always cuddled under it and it smelt of the perfect combination of them both. She smiled as she set it on the couch and reached back in the case.

There wasn't that much stuff to say they'd moved their whole life across the country, but they didn't need that much. Just each other.

'I'm back.' Derek announced as he came back in the room. 'Where's your underwear?'

'Here,' she giggled, handing him the bag. 'And you can take yours too while you're at it.' she said, handing him another bag.

'Thanks.' he grinned, kissing her again. He was very kissy today. Not that she was complaining.

He had been kissy on the plane, and in the airport, and at every red light they had hit on the way home. But she'd take kissy Derek over pissy Derek any day. The move was going relatively well and she just couldn't wait to snuggle up with him tonight in their bed. They'd decided to sleep in her old room until they got a new bed for her mom's room. It just felt the thought of having sex in her mom's bed, compared to her teenage room which they'd had sex in numerous times.

'What next?' he asked, coming back in empty handed.

'Sheets.' she said, handing him some clean ones. 'These need to replace the ones on my bed.'

'Okay.' he nodded.

'You're being very good.' she noted, leaning to kiss him quickly.

'I'm always good.' he shrugged.

'You are.' she grinned. 'And I love you.'

'I love you too.' he breathed. 'Always.'

'Hmmmm.' she smiled, cupping his cheek softly. 'Now go change the sheets.'

'Going.' he nodded.

'Oh wait!' She gasped. 'The blanket.' she said, putting it in his arms.

'The blanket.' he nodded, turning around again.

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDM

Meredith sighed happily as she put her empty pizza box on the floor and leaned across to settle herself against Derek.

'You full?' he asked, kissing the top of her head.

'Very.' She smiled.

'Good.' He breathed. 'It feels weird.'

'Being here?' she murmured, reaching for his hand and playing with it.

'Yeah.' He whispered. 'It doesn't feel like ours.'

'The house?'

'Hmmm.'

'It will do.' She insisted. 'We've only been here a couple of hours.'

'True.' He breathed. 'I guess it will feel more like home the more we're here.'

'It will.' She agreed. 'Once my stuff is lying everywhere.'

'Hopefully we'll be at the hospital long too much for you to make a mess.' He joked, squeezing her.

'Hey,' she pouted. 'My mess will make it more homely.'

'Okay.' He laughed, rolling his eyes.

'Be careful Derek Shepherd.' She warned.

'Okay.' He sighed. 'I do love your endearing mess.'

'Thank you.' She giggled.

'Does it feel like home for you?' he asked after a couple of minutes of silence.

'Kinda. Not really. Kinda…. In another life.'

'Hmmm?'

'I mean, I grew up here.' She shrugged. 'But I haven't lived here properly in what… like seven years?'

'Yeah.' He whispered into her hair.

'A lot of memories… just not recent.'

'We can make our own.' He promised, his lips grazing her neck softly.

'Hmmm.' She sighed happily. 'Lots.'

'Lots.' he agreed.

'You know… we do already have some good memories in this house.'

'We do?' he asked, pulling back from her neck, his breath hot on her ear.

'uh-huh.' She nodded. 'Remember when you came here to surprise me during summer? When we first got together?'

'Oh… I do.' He breathed, a smile spreading across his face. 'I told you I couldn't come.'

'You did.' She smiled, entwining their fingers. 'I was so sad… and then you were here.'

'I was here.' He echoed.

'Do you remember, you fucked me right here on the couch?' she asked softly. 'That was the first time we didn't use protection.'

'Shit yeah it was.' He breathed. 'I wanted you so much that I forgot.'

'Me too.' She sighed. 'We had a lot of sex that weekend.'

'We did.' He smiled fondly. 'It was the only time I saw you over summer, had to make the most of it.'

'Indeed.' She giggled. 'That was good sex.'

'Great sex.'

'We've always had good sex. Right from the beginning.'

'Cause you're sexy.' He murmured, his lips moving back to her neck.

'Derek.' She laughed.

'It's true.' He said, moving his hand from hers to graze her bare stomach underneath her t-shirt.

'I love you.' She whispered.

'I love you too. And I'm horny.' He breathed, his hands still roaming over her bare skin, his hands just on her stomach making her tense. Her breasts aching and nipples tightening.

'Der… I didn't have time… didn't have time to change my underwear.' She stammered, leaning into her husbands strong arms.

'If you're horny too I don't care about underwear. You can save that for me tomorrow.'

'Hmmmm.' She almost moaned as she felt his hands roaming lower, approaching the waistband of her sweatpants. 'I am,' she breathed as she bit at his lip, arching her back as his hands reached her bra covered chest.

'I think I need to get you out of these clothes.' He said huskily.

'Please.' She begged.

'Kay.' He mumbled quietly, moving her off him s that he could kiss her forcefully, his hands going to the hem of her t shirt.

'Oh Derek….' She breathed, her hands on his chest after he tossed her t shirt to the side.

'Let me take these pants off.' He said, lifting her hips so that he could slide her sweatpants down, leaving her in her underwear. Which wasn't particularly sexy, but the way he looked at her made her feel like it was anyway.

'I want you,' she moaned, reaching her hand down to his crotch and feeling his erection through his jeans, shivering as he heard him groan. 'No.. I...I need you.'

'I need you too. Here? On the couch? Recreate some memories?'

'Yes.' She moaned, her fingers going to the buttons of his shirt as her mouth found his.

'Maybe even better than last time.' He breathed.

'Yeah.' She gasped into his mouth. 'Spank me.'

'Fuck….'

'I'm so horny.'

'Apparently.' He agreed, bringing her onto his lap and closing his hands around her ass.

'God yes.' she moaned. 'Please...yes.'

'Really?' he asked breathlessly, slapping her ass gently.

'Derek…' she sighed, kissing him hard. 'Take your pants off. I need you.'

'Okay…' he breathed, moving to take his pants off before getting back on the couch and pulling her back onto his lap, moaning as her body rubbed up against his and he brought his hand down again on her ass again, a little harder this time.

'Fuck.' She whimpered.

'We need your panties off.' he growled, spanking her ass again.

'Yeah.' She breathed, standing up off him and throwing her black panties across the room. 'Baby?' she asked innocently, her hands going behind her back to unclasp her bra.

'Yes baby girl?' he asked, wrapping his arms around her waist as she stood before him.

'Last time we slept on this couch…' she began as he buried his face in her breasts.

'Yeah…' he said, muffled.

'You didn't get to eat me…we were too excited.'

'Fuck.' He moaned, his hands travelling down to her bare ass and squeezing it. 'I need to eat you.'

'Wait wait wait,' she said, stopping him as he began to kneel in front of her.

'I thought maybe you could eat me while I eat you.'

'Oh fuck.' He moaned, liking along her folds. 'Yes.'

'Yeah?' she grinned, her hands fisting in his hair as his mouth on her immediately gave her pleasure.

'Yes.' He said, not moving from his spot in between her legs.

'Then get up so I can suck you.' She purred, rolling her hips into his mouth.

'God Der…' she breathed as she watched him stand up. 'Pants.'

'Pants,' he repeated, pulling down his boxers.

'I want you in my mouth.'

'Fuck' he groaned, as her hand immediately went to his dick.

'You're so huge,' she smiled appreciatively, jerking her hand slightly.

'Ohhh…' he breathed in ecstasy.

'So big,' she purred into his ear, rubbing her pert nipples against his chest.

'You know how to turn me on.'

'I want to suck you, Derek,' she breathed. 'And I want you to lick me dry while you come in my mouth.'

'Come here.' He ordered, pulling her on to the couch and spanking her ass again.

'Derek…' she smiled as she took his pulsing erection into her mouth.

'Fuck.' he groaned, his hands massaging her ass, as she took him deep into her throat, letting him fuck her mouth as hard as he wanted. She always let him relish in as much pleasure as he could, because she knew he would reciprocate it, and possibly give her even more. As if on cue he reciprocated by sucking intensely on her clit, his other hand moving to stroke her ass, something that always turned her on so much. Her body was heating up and all she wanted was to feel him come in her mouth. She needed him to come in her mouth as she came in his, and she could feel hers coming soon. He had that effect on her. He made her so wet. Turned her on so bad. Made her come so hard. He was a freaking genius in bed and she needed him to feel as good as she did.

'Mer…' he groaned and she felt him push a finger into her.

'Oh…Derek.. fuck…' she hummed, sucking even harder at him.

'Yes!' he gasped, sucking her clit into his mouth again, swirling his tongue around it over and over.

'Derek!' she screamed.

His other hand was still gripping her ass and she fought the urge to come right there in his face. He took her breath away and she wasn't sure a blowjob was enough to thank him for the powerful orgasm that was about to overtake her. She tried to push through, sucking him harder and harder, taking him deeper and deeper.

'Fuck!' she cried around his huge twitching dick. 'Fuck!'

'Yes! Deeper please Mer… please… fuck!'

'Derek….' She moaned.

'God, yes!' he gasped, his hips thrusting continually into her tiny warm mouth. 'Baby…'

'Fuck!' she gasped, pressing her hips further into his face as she took him deeper into her throat, desperate for him to come. Just as she sucked at him again, a powerful orgasm took over her entire body. 'Derek!' she screamed as she felt him explode in her mouth and come hard into the back of her throat.

'Fuck Mer!' he growled. 'Mer! Fuck! Fuck!'

They lapped each other, taking every last drop. His dick started to soften but she kept her swirling her tongue as she felt his own mouth still against her clit. He never stopped pleasuring her, his hands still roaming her ass and his tongue still going over her as his flaccid dick remained in her wet mouth.

'Derek…' she whispered.

'Ohhhh….' he moaned, dipping his tongue deeper into her.

'That was amazing.' she whispered as she rested her head on his naked thigh.

'So amazing.' He echoed.

'I love you.' She whispered as she kissed his inner thigh.

'Hmmmm.' he breathed, his hand tracing nonsensical patterns along her thigh and ass. 'I love you too. So much.'

'Love you.' she repeated, stroking his flaccid dick. 'Do you need a minute to recover?'

'Please.' he whispered.

'Kay.' she breathed, sitting up and holding him in her arms, her fingers trailing through his sweaty hair. 'I mean it, I really love you Derek.' she whispered as her other hand trailed along his bicep.

'Me too.' he breathed. 'Did you think I was joking this whole time?' he laughed softly.

'No.' she giggled. 'I just... I love you doesn't seem like enough.'

'It's always enough.'

'No... I just... I love you more than _I love you_.'

'I know.' he murmured.

'You do?' she asked quietly as he kissed the top of her chest where his face was resting.

'Yeah.' he breathed. 'Me too.'

'Hmmmm?'

'I love you more than _I love you_ suggests.'

'Hmmm.' she smiled happily, peppering kisses from his hair to the side of his face. 'I love you more than anything.'

'I know you do.' he whispered.

'Good.'

'You're so special.'

'What?' she giggled breathlessly as she held her naked husband in her arms.

'You. You're so special. I love you.'

'Love you too.' she kissed the top of his head. 'Thank you. I know I've already said it but thank you so much for doing this.'

'I would do anything for you.'

'I know you would.' she whispered.

'Really?' he breathed. 'Cause that's not what I was saying originally.'

'I know.' she agreed. 'But I know how much you love me. And I would do anything for you, even if it threw me off and made me mad at first.'

'I love you.'

'You've already said that.' she giggled.

'I know.' he said simply. 'Just wanted to say it again.'

'Hmmmm.' she smiled, hugging him closer if that was even possible.

'We'll be okay, you and me Mer. We'll be okay out here.'

'Yeah.' she agreed.

'We'll be okay.'

'Hmmmmm.'

'You're making a lot of hmmmm noises tonight.'

'Just happy.'

'Good. Me too.'

'You make me happy.'

'You make me happy too.' he said, pulling away from her chest to look up into her eyes. He had the bluest eyes she had ever seen and she swore in that moment her heart physically swelled with love for him, even though she knew that wasn't literally possible.

'Love you.' she whispered before leaning her head down and kissing him softly.

'Love you too.' he breathed against her lips. 'You feeling okay about your mom?'

'Yeah.' she said quietly. 'We're here if she needs us.'

'We are.' he agreed.

'Think I might go and see her in a few days if I get chance.'

'We could go tomorrow if you want?' he offered, squeezing her hand.

'No.' she shook her head. 'Just want us tomorrow.'

'Just us.' he smiled. 'If you want me to come with you when you go, I will.'

'Thank you.' she smiled as he brushed a piece of hair behind her ear. 'Are you recovered yet?'

'I think so.' he nodded.

'Good.' she whispered. 'I want you to make love to me.'

'I think that can be arranged.' he replied, smiling up at her with his fucking puppy dog eyes that made her weak. He had a gorgeous face. A perfect face. A perfect face for a perfect man who was about to make perfect love to her.

 _Thank you for reading! Please review X_


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